oh well im guess im just catching up...lol.....
Just got it as an email...
Helen
an atheist was walking through the woods.
'what majestic trees'!
'what powerful rivers'!
oh well im guess im just catching up...lol.....
Just got it as an email...
Helen
what do you expect from such simple creatures?
your last name stays put.
the garage is all yours.. wedding plans take care of themselves.
What do you expect from such simple creatures?
your last name stays put.
The garage is all yours.
Wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
You can be President.
You can never be pregnant.
You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car mechanics tell you the truth.
The world is your urinal.
You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
Same work, more pay.
Wrinkles add character.
Wedding dress~$5000. Tux rental~$100.
People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
You can open all your own jars.
You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
You almost never have strap problems in public.
You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
Everything on your face stays its original colour.
The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life.
Your belly usually hides your big hips.
One wallet and one pair of shoes one colour for all seasons.
You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife.
You have freedom of choice concerning growing a moustache.
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
an atheist was walking through the woods.
'what majestic trees'!
'what powerful rivers'!
An atheist was walking through the woods.
'What majestic trees'!
'What powerful rivers'!
'What beautiful animals'!
He said to himself.
As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.
He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him. He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.
At that instant the Atheist cried out, 'Oh my God!'
Time Stopped.
The bear froze.
The forest was silent.
As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. 'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.' 'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer'?
The atheist looked directly into the light, 'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian'?
'Very Well,' said the voice.
The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:
'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'
has someone started a christmas card exchange list yet for this year?
we did this in the past and it was such fun to get all the great cards.. .
I am now officially out of christmas cards.
But i have sent one to everyone on the list.
Will have to get more next week.
Check your boxes next week......
Helen
has someone started a christmas card exchange list yet for this year?
we did this in the past and it was such fun to get all the great cards.. .
I have about 10 more to do and thats not the ones i have to do for over here i think i will leave them till closer to late december.
I was thinking while i was doing them how nice it is to get something in the mail.
its not often you get a nice card or even a letter in the mail these days,
We tend to do everything online. Well i know i do.
Helen
has someone started a christmas card exchange list yet for this year?
we did this in the past and it was such fun to get all the great cards.. .
yeah well i wanted to be organised at least i can do that part i was going to take my list into work yesterday and do some but i forgot.
Where i live there are very few shops and i have bought most things on line just to make sure i had them on time and i wanted to make sure that everyone gets their card before christmas.
My hand is getting sore from all the cards
But its great fun!!!
Helen
has someone started a christmas card exchange list yet for this year?
we did this in the past and it was such fun to get all the great cards.. .
Thanks BEM
I know its kinda early but i live the other side of the world and not sure of the length of time for postage.
Also i am one busy person so this year i have had to be very organised.
Heck i've even done all my chrismas shopping. Yep you read right its all DONE!!!!!!!!!
Helen.
Watch out for your letter boxes as i will be sending more today!!!!!
well christimas will soon be here !!.
for those that are new we have done this for the last few years, what it involves is that those who want to join in will post to this thread and then pm me their name and address.
i will then collate the names and addresses and assign everyone a person to buy a gift for.
btt
has someone started a christmas card exchange list yet for this year?
we did this in the past and it was such fun to get all the great cards.. .
btt
now that i can see right through the crap that is the jw religion, i sometimes ask myself - how come you blindly believed all that rubbish for 30 years??!!
i am so annoyed with myself for that - i have a degree, yet i was totally duped for such a large part of my life.
and now that i can see how so full of holes it all is, i kick myself for not seeing it before.
so many here have said that.
Even me.
Just glad you are now out.
And you know better, and different
Helen