I can relate to many of the things you said.. I'm also 3rd generation. Being the study-minded 'the-original-greek-says-brother' does not really help when you finally find out... although it does help you to find out in the first place. I remember making some comment about the etymology of 'diabolos' and being praised by the DO.. if only he'd known my thoughts :) As for keeping underground, I also played that game for a while.. like Morpheus, indeed. But there are no Neo's left in my cong, so I'm pulling out my cards.. to be honest I've really had enough of it... my family will absolutely not be influenced by me, my friends are out now, so I'm beginning to fade away, like a shadow. The only way to win the game is to stop playing very slowly, in my opinion. You have a right to live your own life as well.
How long do you want to play the game? Do you have any plans for the future? What will happen if you just say 'I don't believe it anymore' to your family? Please provide feedback, or you can PM me.
Regards,
Deus Mauzzim