Hello everybody, thank you for your input. It is great to know that there are so many people out there that can understand what I am talking about.
My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 Years!! and when I met him he was DF he just got back to the jw's in Nobember of last year because his only sister who is a JW was getting married and it was very important for him to be there. My boyfriend has told me in confidence that sometimes he wishes he was never baptized with the JW's, then he starts regreting his own feelings and his words and begins asking God for forgiveness.... He is so tortured by his emotions and his inner thoughts. But he changes his mind, one day he feels that his heart is not with the jw's and another day he wants to be a strict witness and wants to follow all the rules.... I love him with all my heart but things seem to be getting more tangled up now that he is back. Whenever he gets into his i'm in the truth trips he starts throwing the submissive wife term alot at me and that scares me....but then he tells me that he loves me so much that he knows that I am the best thing that has ever happened to him. He also tells me that I am a good woman and that I have a good heart and that I am too good to him eventhough he is so screwed up.
P.S we still celebrate my birthday and his birthday together just me and him but we celebrate!! So I don't know what to think ??? Does this sound like other JW's out there?