Posts by StephaneLaliberte

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

DJS: I am getting annoyed by your overly condescending tone. Chill a little. All I ask for is a conversation with respect and I get plenty of insults from you.

I have been on this board for 9 years and you know what? I think I can only remember 2 people who successfully sent a lawyer letter. I am not saying that there can't be more. All I am stating is that obviously, this is not a popular route.

Like I said, perhaps lying would not work in her area. However, you cannot dismiss the fact that I have witnessed people around me successfully lie their way through elders and JCs. The large majority of JWs get disfellowshipped because they confess. She doesn't have to confess and should not.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

DJS: Two things I would like to ask you: When were you an elder? 2, 10, 20 years ago? Also, why would it not be advisable to try lying before using the lawyer route?

FYI: If I think of the elders in my area, 30 years ago, they would have asked for the wedding pictures, the certificate, and would have called the witnesses of my wedding. Now, they would just take my word for it.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

Well, looks like elders in my area are not as harsh as in your area. so, in that respect, you may be right. If she has "nazi" elders...you are totally right. Still, that does not mean that what I said would not work in my area (Canada, Ontario/Quebec).

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

Oh, if she doesn't mind being DFs, than, that would be amazing. I dream of the day I can tell them of.

If you and your loved ones accept the DF route, than, that is a better route to take. The lying and lawyer is not that easy... it takes its toll emotionally.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

Guys, we are talking about man who will let go paedophiles due to the 2 witness rule. Its much easier for them to let things go when they hear something they WANT to hear.

"I never told my mom I moved in with my husband. In fact, I didn't want her to know I was married. I was ashamed of marrying so quickly." And than, go on on how he wanted sex before marriage and how you stood your ground and how you prayed and how important your relationship to Jehovah is. And cry. Crying helps alot. Say you wanted to set things straight and want to go back to the meetings. Ask for your card to be sent to the new congregation. Etc.

You know, the type of thing the elders want to be told so they can let go of something that will otherwise, prevent them from spending time with their family.

Now, if all that doesn't work... well, the lawyer route may work to.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

Oh, and yes, I personally know an elder who, at a restaurant, shared the very funny story of how one apostate sent him a lawyer letter and how he basically wiped his ass with it.

Honestly, you may be right, I don't have real data about 50% for the lawyer letter, so, I take this back. But as I can remember the laughter of that elder at the restaurant and a lawyer is actually all barks and no bit.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

My sister, my mom, my cousin, my self, my friend, my dad, we ALL LIED! Some were to avoid the JC, some were in a JC faking their remorse. One way or another, lying worked.

I know that lying sounds childish and even, without values. But when you are working against a system that requires two witnesses, I do believe it is the best route. Also, you may even use lying as the first option. The second being - the letter from your lawyer. You need to try everything.

One thing for sure is that sending the lawyer letter before even trying to lying your way through it could take away some of the very best chances you may have.

And yes, most elders are actually sloppy and don't care when it comes to people who left and don't go back to the hall. Probably that the only reason they are following up on it is because someone reported them. If you feed them something they can feed it back to the anonymous tipster. Than, they will be happy about this and go on living their lives.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

DJS: getting a lawyer is a 50% thing. If you got elders with some balls, they will know that a layer letter is, in fact, all barks and no bite. From my own experience and that of those I personally know, lying your way through it is closer to 75% chance. Oh, and by all means, don't let it go to a JC. JCs generally tend to establish repentance rather than guilt.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

They don't find it in the public records? She can then make up a story where she was scammed by a false "civil servant" who told her she was in fact married and gave her the false record! By the way, I doubt that they would go through the trouble of fact checking things that much. Most elders don't even car that much.

70

Someone anonymously tipped the elders?

by raven in

so here an update on my current situation, in a nutshell i've been trying to quietly fade for the past 5 months.. well, my mom somehow found out that i am currently fading and that i live with my boyfriend (for more info on this check my previous posts) i told her yes i live with him and yes i no longer want to be a jw.

anyways, yesterday she met my boyfriend.. awkward.

and after lunch she pulled me aside to tell me that the po came up to her (he was part of my jc when i was reproved) he said to her "someone came to me and said - i cannot say who so they will remain anonymous- but that your daughter is living with someone" my mom confirmed and apparently he told her that i have one week to confess this, and if i don't my parents are obligated to tell them everything.. what kind of nonsense is that?

StephaneLaliberte

I can't imagine the JWs bringing you to court for fraud over made up wedding papers. And if they do, then, you obviously were under duress. So, I wouldn't worry about that.