just curious to see who else left in the same year as me.
and how are things for you now.. it has been 2 1/2 years since i left and damn time has gone fast.
i now have heaps of fun.
My husband and I attended our last meeting in June 2007. We had little or no contact with JWs in the last two years and refused to discuss our reasons for leaving with most who asked. We were df'd July this year for apostasy.
Life is good, and getting better. I will have my first Christmas tree this year in 42 years. Can't wait!
i wanted to say a few things to current and former elders.
it was really a post by alltimejeff on 10/1/2009 that got me thinking about this and i address a few things that he says here.
but i dont want to single him out because i really think that he is typical of many, and he did in fact apologize for his actions at the end of his post.
The post above by "the dude abides" is actually by me, whoknows. My son was logged on and I posted as him by mistake. damn him for using my laptop.
i believe someday it will be as obscure and strange as say the russelites.
the meetings will only be attended by ppl over sixty or so and it will hardly be considered anywhere near as significant a religion as it is today.
i wonder what will begin this process.
I agree that the increased information that people in general have at their fingertips via the internet will eventually be the downfall of the borg. The increasing isolation by the GB of the faithful through discouragement of education, the forbidding of reading anything negative about the organization in any form or speaking with anyone who has been disfellowshipped has to be seen by the average person as the desperate act of a cult trying to preserve their membership. A comment was made above that when a bible study is finally started with an "innocent" - they quickly are informed by friends or family about the true nature of the religion and the study is lost. I'm so glad to hear it. My husband and I were recently disfellowshipped for apostasy. When I tell people at work that we have friends who have known us since we were children no longer speak to us, they are stunned. They think of JWs as being a backward, but benign, religion. When I explain the shunning policy that JWs have that extends to even the parent/child relationship, they are shocked. There has been some recent press about Scientology "disconnecting" family who disagree with the religion. This is ain't gonna fly in an enlightened, educated and informed western culture.
i realize i'm a bit quiet here, and most if not all won't remember my story, so here is a brief synopsis.
i recently decided that i'd rather pursue life rather than a future life promised but not realized.
i was fortunate enough that my husband agreed in that he didn't want any man telling him what he had to do, or how to live, and so left with me.
Heartbreaker,
You and your family have a lot of courage for doing the right thing. You are so right to protect your children and allow them the freedom to be honest with everyone should they be asked about controversial subjects. You said that you have lost all of your lifelong friends. That happened to us in the last 2 years. We are in our 50s and my husband had been an elder for 26 yrs, so we were obviously heavily involved in the religion. We tried to walk away quietly and refused to discuss our reasons with anyone who inquired, but they still dug up enough gossip to have us disfellowshipped for apostacy two months ago. The first year is the hardest. We, too, have our two children out with us and that is huge. We also have siblings who were never associated. Keep yourselves busy with healthy, fun and interesting activities and in time the hurt does fade. I really feel for you, but two years plus out - and I am feeling better all the time. We have reconnected with some people and met some new ones. I get to have my first Xmas tree in 42 years this year and I am so excited. Enjoy the freedom.
hey everyone,.
i've decided for the first time in my life to celebrate christmas this year, just like everyone else around here.
trouble is i have no idea how to begin!
I am getting my first Christmas tree this year since I was 15, which was 42 years ago. I am extremely excited about it. Christmas was always a happy time in our house - even though my parents fought like cats and dogs the rest of the year. I have very warm and fuzzy memories of the whole experience. My favorite part is the tree.
A good tip I was given was that when you string the lights, you zig zag them on the tree, don't wrap them round and round. Apparently it is much easier to take down. For me it has to be a real tree, the smell in the house is half of the experience.
I can't wait!
so i know many of you guys say the best way to show dubs is to be all happy and all when you exit.....but not all of us are doin that well at it....even though i have lost all friends from my dub life....i really dont want to lose my son and folks....this would happen if i end this odd and painful arrangement of a marriage to a really wonderful wife who is hardcore jw.
my desire for freedom and normal social life, and the 800 lb gorilla in the room we live with are not doing so well...........i am tired of having to leave the house and go in the garage to talk on the phone with my non-dub friends.....tired of totally separate social lives.......tired of rules in place that prevent us from speaking about certain taboo topics with each other........my mental/emotional state is not well and has not been for four years.
so i spoke with my dad very openly and honestly about how i have had to wear "masks" through life....one for school since third grade to fit in....another for my parents and jw friends........and that now i still lead a double life when not around my wife........told him outright i feel jws meet every single definition of a cult btw.......he already knew i felt that way but had never said it so directly........i asked him if he felt history repeats itself and could fds not be just like the scribes and pharisees that made so many rules for gods people that they had actually corrupted gods message............he said he has wondered that before too.
I’m so sorry Oompa. You have been so open here on the board, I think we all feel as if we know you and many can totally feel your pain. I know you really gave it the good college try with your wife and family. If they decide to shun you, that is totally on them and their conscience. All you have done is to make the choice to change your mind regarding your religion, a decision you made as an uninformed kid. Last month’s Awake said that this is a basic human right and one should never have to choose between religion and family. The situation you have been enduring sounds intolerable. If you could just chuck it all and get away for awhile it might afford you the healing you need.
I wish you all the best.
so we had our circuit assembly this past weekend, and it was the first one in my life that i told my wife i would not be attending.
we had a brief conversation on why, and she said well just go to this last one with me, and then when we can discuss what we learn and compare it to why you've been expressing your "new" feelings towards the wts.. i love my wife, and as much as i thought i was gonna hate it i decided to go.
now that i no longer want to be a jehovah's witness it really didnt bother me that nobody hardly talked to me despite me living in this same area for 4 1/2 years, everybody views me as spiritually weak because i dont go out in service, rarely attend meetings, dont comment, lesson is never underlined, so the "friends" never interact with me anyway and i'm use to it, actually that's the way i prefer it.
Billy - thank you for that insight into Paul, Barnabas, Timothy and the GB. That was a real "duh" moment for me. Paul basically told the supposed GB to "go screw themselves".
hi guys...oompa here.
was i in rehab for alcohol addiction or jwd addiction!?!?
!......no computers or cellphones allowed so i have been awol awhile..... ya, i finally made my self sick enough on booze to realize i was really sick and tired of being sick and tired....so checked myself into rehab without any planning at all and while wife was out of town on a family retreat...it was a a very desperate moment in my life, and i was extremely physically and emotionally sick....i was so desperate i took zero time to reseach where to go, but called an old school friend who said rehab had saved his life and he made the calls and actually took me and helped me check in to the place he went to 5 years ago.
Oompa-
You are a funny guy, being disfellowshipped from rehab! I guess it was a good thing, because you said you had made some real friends at AA. Whatever works, that's the important thing. Interesting comment you made about how everyone else in rehab was supported with cards, letters,etc. and you merited nothing, after all of your years of association and the friendships (??!) even though the congregation knew of your situation. They should be ashamed.
I wish you strength to stay on the path. You have our very best wishes.
i've been lurking in the shadows of this forum for about 6 months or so.
i'll try to be brief here, but i apologize in advance if this is not "brief enough" for you.
anyways i'm a 27 year old african american young man, i was born and raised a jehovah's witness.
Welcome to the board! This place is a refuge for people in your situation. I can really relate to your parent problem. Even though my husband and I had major issues with some teachings for many years, we remained in a state of cognitive dissonance until after my mom-in-law died at age 91!! She too was a wonderful, loving person, the best mother anyone could want. It was only after her death that we allowed ourselves to really say out loud what we had suppressed for so long. When we finally started talking about it - it was all we talked about for a solid year. I realize that we are lucky to have both been on the same page. Don't give up hope for your wife, there are many here who with patience have been able to get their spouses to eventually "see the light".
Where are you Besty and Sweetpea? This young man needs your advice!
Hang in there, we all feel for you!
happified is a real watchtower word(tm), by the way!.
if you want to give the wts credit for anything, then at least give them credit for their remarkably simple solution to every ill suffered by mankind.. it is a "one size fits all" solution and might be part of the appeal the wts has attracting people who have a hard time with reason and common sense.. they won't specifically tell you what that solution is, though.
if they did, they would even get less converts than they get now, and currently they ain't gettin' many.
Can't wait for your next one Farkel! Keep 'em coming - we all need a laugh.
