will i be stupid enough
Posts by flower
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13happy memories of my father
by refiners fire insomething that happened with an ex dub friend of mine prompted this post.he finally wrote a letter to his elder father telling him how he really felt.i read the assorted corespondences.. in the letter to his father my friend mentioned that he could only remember 1 instance where father and son spent quality time together.. they spent an afternoon (1 afternoon)flying a kite down at the park.. that was the only pleasure incident he could remember with his dad.. i wept and wept reading that.
for it reminded me of my own dad.. i could barely remember any pleasure incidents either.. my father and i went on 3 camping trips, when i was a teenager.. we did that together.
all the rest of my memories were of him compelling me to do things i didnt want to do.. this causes me to wonder if this is a phenomena unique to the dubs.. no memory of quality time spent with your dad.
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9
Not Saluting The Flag Singing The Nat' Anthem, H
by Celtic innot saluting the national flag or standing up to sing the national anthem of your particular country, how did this make you feel at school and what were the reactions of your class mates?.
in your jw upbringings, any other funny, weird or mad school time experiences to share, where there seemed great conflicts of interest, and again, how did these make you feel?
with these experiences in mind, how did it shape you into an individual, and finally which specific emotions did you notice within yourselves as you were growing up?.
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flower
razor,
wow at least you got to go to a prom. thats cool. and hickeys, valentines and flowers? see i never had the nerve to 'do' anything. my father i think took things a lot farther than other elders. i mean we were literally scared to even try anything. at least i was, when my younger brothers came along they did a LOT more than me and I realized that they didnt get in nearly as much trouble as I thought I would have. now when i think back i wish i hadnt been so terrified of getting in trouble and just did things. of course now i can say that. i never had a boyfriend or a date or anything like that. well actually this other witness boy and i started hanging out a little my senior year of high school. but it was like a week before school got out so it was only for a week or so that we hung out but i think he considered us boyfriend and girlfriend. of course after graduation he was too scared of my dad to pursue it so it was over and the last i heard the poor kid had gone to jail for murder or something like that.
yes going door to door was very hard for me as well. i always hated going to territories where i knew kids i went to school with lived. it was pretty bad all around. just being there at the door knowing that they want you to go away and leave them alone. it was so demoralizing having to have people hide and pretend not to be home so they dont have to see or talk to you.
one of the problems i had with the org when i first started to question things was the fact that my parents never 'replaced' any of the things they took away from us. like you said your parents gave yall a 'christmas'. our folks never did anything to make us feel special. we didnt get presents unless we were graduating from high school. we never went on vacation to make up for the 'family time' that others had a xmas. we didnt spend summers at the beach or do anything that would bring us closer as a family and i think a lot of other witness familys did it was just my dad. if you take all that away you have to replace it with something and i think ive read that in the societys literature at some point but of course my dad the hypocrite took what he wanted from the literature and left the rest. the only fun activities we had as kids was when the congregation organized a picnic or something and that wasnt often enough. we werent allowed to watch tv much either growing up so i know how you felt all those countless hours in your room lying in the dark...i was right there with ya.
flower
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23
hello all--new to board; my story
by razorMind inhello everyone...hope all are having a great holiday season.. ***warning--kind of long***.
i am 31 and have been "out" for an undetermined # of years...probably starting as soon as i moved out of the house at age 23. i just "drifted away".. i was born into the jw faith.
my parents remain devout and "zealous" to this day.
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flower
oh my goodness, i'm here in shock because i could have written nearly every word of this and it still is so wierd to me to know that other people when through the same things i did growing up. i'm new here too and its all still amazing to me to find a place like this and to finally have someone understand.
i agree completely about the higher ed issue. its so unfair that i have to struggle for the rest of my life to provide for my son when i was intelligent enough to go to school probably on full scholarship. i was just like you..just drifted through school because i had to but had no ambition or motivation to make anything more than passing grades. its amazing that they dont see how they are ruining their kids possibilities of having a decent living by not educating them. after i started to drift away from the org i ended up spending almost 5 years working in a department store for nearly minimum wage. and even now at 29 i am not making enough to support myself and son so i am living with my JW family and miserable because of it. They have set me back so far in my career choices. I now have to figure out a way to finance an education and do it while being a single mother and working full time. Its truly unbelievable that they consider that to be in our best interests.
i love you for posting this i am so happy i found this place
flower
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9
XJW On Death Row Due To Kingdom Hall Trauma[:)==\=
by MadApostate insteven maurice evans,.
appellant, .
vs.. state of florida,.
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flower
this is interesting. i've never heard of any witnesses doing what his step father did though (public apology). that is sick, if it really happened.
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9
Not Saluting The Flag Singing The Nat' Anthem, H
by Celtic innot saluting the national flag or standing up to sing the national anthem of your particular country, how did this make you feel at school and what were the reactions of your class mates?.
in your jw upbringings, any other funny, weird or mad school time experiences to share, where there seemed great conflicts of interest, and again, how did these make you feel?
with these experiences in mind, how did it shape you into an individual, and finally which specific emotions did you notice within yourselves as you were growing up?.
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flower
there really is no way to describe the way it feels as a child to be singled out as different. its hard enough growing up in school where kids can be ruthless but being a witness in school is about as horrifying an experience one can have. the not saluting the flag thing was actually minor in my experience. i mostly just pretended to sing or half salute. the major emotional trauma comes when you have to go to the library or a different classroom because the class is having a holiday party. or when you are a 5 year old but you arent allowed to make the arts and crafts for the holidays like everyone else, you have to just sit in the corner and color a picture or something. when you are in grade school its mostly holiday stuff that causes you most of the anxiety. its the most exciting time of the year for the other kids..new toys, clothes ect. but you arent a part of anything and that is the worst. not being part of anything. then when you get a little older it gets even worse because then there are dances that everyone is talking about and football games and skating parties. at that point you are suffering severe social anxiety and not able to even make friends if you want to. then there is the severe depression that comes when you are feeling so guilty from lying to kids and making up stories about what you did on the weekend or saying you have heard the latest song or seen the latest movie just so you fit it. knowing that you arent allowed to listen to kids music or see movies. there are so many little things that people dont even realize. and of course its straight home after school when all the other kids are playing sports, or working on the yearbook, playing jumprope out on the side walk. you asked about the reaction of classmates. well for me personally i mostly just stayed out of the light. i hid in the back of the class and kept my mouth shut mostly so no one would talk to me. the few times i did make a friend it was short lived. people mostly thought i was snobby because i didnt talk to them or get involved in anything. i was so lonely in school you would not believe it. you also asked what emotion we noticed within ourselves growing up and for me i would have to say self-hate...if that is an emotion. mostly i hated myself and i didnt have any idea that it was the org that was wrong and not me. i had such guilt. i thought I was just different and all the other witnesses were happy. i thought it was because i lied sometimes. i thought that because i ate someones birthday cake or pretended that i celebrated christmas in highschool that is why i was being punished. i honestly thought just i was different because none of my siblings seemed to be going through it. i tried to kill myself for the first time when i was 16 because of that guilt.
flower
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13
happy memories of my father
by refiners fire insomething that happened with an ex dub friend of mine prompted this post.he finally wrote a letter to his elder father telling him how he really felt.i read the assorted corespondences.. in the letter to his father my friend mentioned that he could only remember 1 instance where father and son spent quality time together.. they spent an afternoon (1 afternoon)flying a kite down at the park.. that was the only pleasure incident he could remember with his dad.. i wept and wept reading that.
for it reminded me of my own dad.. i could barely remember any pleasure incidents either.. my father and i went on 3 camping trips, when i was a teenager.. we did that together.
all the rest of my memories were of him compelling me to do things i didnt want to do.. this causes me to wonder if this is a phenomena unique to the dubs.. no memory of quality time spent with your dad.
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flower
never again.
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10
What does HYPOCRITE mean?
by flower inhaving every excuse why its ok for certain witnesses to dismiss whichever rules they choose.. y-.
yelling, arguing, fighting, abuse, and all the other 'unchristianlike' conduct that goes on behind closed doors.
power hungry elders.
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flower
H-
Having every excuse why its ok for certain Witnesses to dismiss whichever rules they choose.Y-
Yelling, arguing, fighting, abuse, and all the other 'unchristianlike' conduct that goes on behind closed doorsP-
Power hungry eldersO-
"Only the meek shall inherit the earth"...(yea right and they are meek?)C-
Christians=Christ-like. nuff saidR-
Repeating scriptures to their kids about 'being obedient to parents in everything' but conveniently forgetting the ones which apply to parents 'not causing their children to become downhearted'I-
Insisting that 'worldly' people are the evil when most people I know are kinder, more caring, and more loving than any witnesses I ever knewT-
Taking everything that makes a childs life enjoyable (friends, love, school activities) and telling them its for the best.E-
Elders who have the nerve to counsel someone for not living up to their rules. -
47
Why are witnessess persecuted?
by YoYoMama inwhy are witnessess persecuted?
most religions out there have this thing against witnesses.
many will do anything to get them banned or to shut their mouths.
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flower
Erich,
actually that may be true, but these witnesses who are doing their own thing and not following the 'mainstream' as you call it, are not real witnesses at all. i was a witness for almost thirty years and have been to dozens of different congregations and there is no way that your way of thinking and what you are doing is acceptable to them. if your circuit overseer knew that you were spending your time here you would be disfellowshiped in a heartbeat and you know it. so dont be trying to pass yourself off as a real witness.
flower
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47
Why are witnessess persecuted?
by YoYoMama inwhy are witnessess persecuted?
most religions out there have this thing against witnesses.
many will do anything to get them banned or to shut their mouths.
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flower
My original question/comment would go to you as well then Erich, and that is, What are you doing here? How is it that after working, preparing for the meetings, doing your personal study, going in field service, and having your family study you still have time left to have discussions with non-believers?
flower
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47
Why are witnessess persecuted?
by YoYoMama inwhy are witnessess persecuted?
most religions out there have this thing against witnesses.
many will do anything to get them banned or to shut their mouths.
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flower
I'm new here, I havent posted an introduction yet or anything as I'm just kinda trying to get to know the place and everyone. But I have a question that I have observed and I dont understand.
You, (YOYOMAMA) are supposedly a JW right? I was born and raised a JW and just recently (within the past two years was disfellowshiped) a few years before that I stopped going and only went to the Memorial and Assemblies. In my almost 30 years of being a witness and knowing hundreds if not thousands of witnesses in my life I have never met a witness that would even come to a site like this, let alone post and argue with Apostates. I know for a fact that no witness would do something like this. It just goes against everything that they are taught. Of all their rules and commands that they have to follow, talking to apostates is THE most important and one that they would never break. So I have been asking myself if the people who post to this and other sites I have seen claiming to be witnesses are actually just non witness that are there to stir things up a little bit. Like on other sites on the web there are people who are there just to keep the conversation going when things get slow and I wonder if thats the case.
Anyway, to answer your question, my opinion is that JW's are no more persecuted than any other radically different religious group. You hear Scientologists and Mormons as well. I know Tom Cruise is a Scientologist and the coach of my favorite football team is a Mormon. I only know that because to most people those are 'different' religions and therefore it is noteworthy..just like Prince being a Jehovah's Witness is noteworthy to them. In most parts of the world, people who belong to 'different' religious groups no longer persecuted but pretty much left alone. There are still places in the world where they are physically harmed for their beliefs and while I am no longer a member I dont agree with that either. I was not happy as a member and it wasnt for me, but there are Witnesses who are happy and if that is what makes them happy they arent hurting anyone so they should be left alone...as long as they let each person decide for themselves.
flower