has anyone here gone nuclear on their spouse and, all of a sudden, came out in the open as a jw opposer?.
by this i mean, sitting them down and saying: i no longer want to be a jw anymore, do not want to go to meetings or preaching anymore!
and, what has happened in the relationship after that?.
Hi Sofia, just checking in....did you decide to 'go nuclear' yet or are you still treading on egg shells...
I feel for you, you're between a rock and a hard place....
my husband is for a change being quite understanding (at the moment) but I have this feeling like underneath it all he is thinking 'shes a demon possessed apostate'.......
Maybe he's trying to 'win me without a word' so maybe I'll finally get some good christian husband behaviour, now why didn't I think of that before?
october 4, 2015. to all congregations.
re: new provisions announced atannual meeting.
dear brothers:.
dont you just love knowing this stuff before your super zealous JW spouse... tee hee hee
now to tantalise him with 'big changes' coming up or not?
has anyone here gone nuclear on their spouse and, all of a sudden, came out in the open as a jw opposer?.
by this i mean, sitting them down and saying: i no longer want to be a jw anymore, do not want to go to meetings or preaching anymore!
and, what has happened in the relationship after that?.
Hi Sofia, I did..., I started by telling him I had serious doubts (6 months ago) i was genuinely upset about it all at the time, really I told him every step of my doubting and discoveries, child abuse, only 0.1% of the population will survive the big A, false predictions, UN membership, AMIII ridiculous talks.. etc etc... Until it got too much for him and he really told me in no uncertain terms that he doesn't want to hear or read anything negative about the org.
Since then I've naturally stopped f.s. and attending most meetings...
i think it helped that he saw the process happening, he tried to help, sat in on a shepherding call with me etc, he could see my doubts were very genuine and I wasn't just being 'rebellious', now he's not pressuring me or anything at all. I still believe in a non-jw way so I don't mind the odd prayer or bible based family study, I just don't go to the Kh most of the time. We do disagree about the kids though (associations) but they are old enough to make their own decisions and are happy that mom is being more relaxed about them going out now!
I have found with him and elders, friends etc that the 'confused and doubting' stance elicits more sympathy and understanding than the 'it's a load of BS' stance!!! Of course they'll try to 'help' you but you just kindly and respectfully ask them to leave it with you and Jehovah. They get busy with other stuff....
Overall I think it's better to be honest though, it's too much emotional and mental strain otherwise x
i was supposed to attend the meeting today, one of my once a month duties for the sake of my family and my fade.
i read the wt and i just can't stomach going.... what this wt does is again and again reiterate that only jws will survive the coming destruction and that they should be happy about this and raise ourselves erect...eg:.
we cannot expect that many people will suddenly convert to true christianity.
Great comments everyone...
Blondie, I agree that the more compassionate jws shut their minds to the reality of what their religion really teaches, I did so for 20 years, I've heard people say things like 'Rahab got her family for her faithfulness', 'Jehovah is the judge' etc. which is all very well but what is the actual official teaching? It is that you have to be associated with the congregation of Jw 'true believers' in order to survive and you have NO chance if your not (tell that to the population of Sudan). And there are quite a few JWs I know who relish that, like fmf said, making derogatory remarks when people don't respond in the ministry. I used to comfort myself with the thought that 'a vast mixed company' left Egypt with the Israelites, well today's wt confirms it 'we will not see a mass conversion....'
It's so hypocritical the way they counsel every now and then about how we should not judge others, that we should see the rafter in our own eye etc etc, but they only ever apply that to fellow jws, what they don't admit is that all witnesses are taught from young kids to judge and look down on non witnesses as 'Worldly', misled by satan and prime for adverse judgement.
For me the stats say it all, compare population growth to witness growth (it's about 700 baptized a day, to population growth (net of death) of 220,000 per day) and see how many extra children they say Jehovah has to destroy for every day that he shows 'patience'.
i was supposed to attend the meeting today, one of my once a month duties for the sake of my family and my fade.
i read the wt and i just can't stomach going.... what this wt does is again and again reiterate that only jws will survive the coming destruction and that they should be happy about this and raise ourselves erect...eg:.
we cannot expect that many people will suddenly convert to true christianity.
i was supposed to attend the meeting today, one of my once a month duties for the sake of my family and my fade.
i read the wt and i just can't stomach going.... what this wt does is again and again reiterate that only jws will survive the coming destruction and that they should be happy about this and raise ourselves erect...eg:.
we cannot expect that many people will suddenly convert to true christianity.
I was supposed to attend the meeting today, one of my once a month duties for the sake of my family and my fade. I read the wt and I just can't stomach going...
what this wt does is again and again reiterate that only Jws will survive the coming destruction and that they should be happy about this and raise ourselves erect...eg:
we cannot expect that many people will suddenly convert to true Christianity. Instead, it will be an opportunity for all true worshippers to prove their love for Jehovah and to support the anointed.
.......God’s people will boldly declare a strong message of judgment that will affect all people.
I literally feel like a panic attack, sickness at the thought of attending a meeting where the worshippers support the 'true hope' that 99.9% of all humanity will soon die, whose carcasses will be picked by birds! I can't believe I used to 'rejoice in the hope' when what it is really is a message of horrible death and destruction of innocent men, women and children.
i can't sit there and listen to people answer up excitedly that they are looking forward to their imminent deliverance when it means that their neighbors and their children can look forward to a horrible death.
does anyone else have a similar emotional reaction to this 'good news'?
well it seems for many on this board the time came to leave the w.t and cross the bridge in to a real world.
speaking for myself l feel i did not enter the cold and lonely world i was lead to believe i was entering.
rather i have discovered it was no great loss leaving a world that had protected me with false, dreams, fantazy and false promises.. but what have i really achieved by my leaving that i value?.
I love having Saturday and Sunday stretch before me and wonder what I should do today?
i love going to the beach instead of a gloomy KH, looking out to sea and thanking a creator with true appreciation instead of forced devotion motivated by fear of man.
i love having the dark cloud of guilt, self-doubt, never good enough finally lifted.
I love seeing people as they really are instead of through the tinted 'worldly' designation, feeling part of humanity again, seeing so much good, selflessness and charity and being able to appreciate it and contribute to it, instead of being told its a waste of time.
i love seeing my kids make natural friendships with normal people, and not have to force friendships with a judgemental select few, for whom they were never good enough.
the only time I feel like crap is when I have to face the decision of whether to attend a meeting for my family and my fade's sake. The guilt and twisted emotions come back. There are some people in the hall I genuinely love, good people whether they're in the org or not, but there are so many ready to judge and point the finger, elders ready to pressure and question...it makes me feel ill.
i used to be jon preston.
now that i've escaped the watchtower i have much to report on.
in just a year i left the cult, started living, reset my kids' brains, had my spouse cheat, move to a new location, and started a new job.
Hi Guy, I'm with you, don't know what quite to believe yet but someone posted this statement in here a few weeks ago and it sums things up for me perfectly;
"I'd rather have questions I can't answer than answers I can't question"
i look forward to asking the questions with an open mind instead of a blinkered one, finding my own truth instead of letting some men find it for me, at the moment i believe in the message of Jesus Christ his compassion, kindness, mercy are lessons for everyone and that he certainly didn't mean us to turn our backs on the rest of mankind and their real life issues (whilst we wander around in circles, knock on empty doors and drink coffee)
first of all; i must admit that i'm not a huge fan of putting people in boxes like this, it is not an exact science.
but i still think the data can be quite interesting and i intend to collect it and share it in a structured way with you guys.
so without future ado here are the details.. link to test: .
so, much against my inclination, i went to the meeting this sunday morning.
just starting to fade, but i needed to do it so that it doesn't look like my hubby turned my head during last week's vacations.
since i'm not just disappearing cold turkey, i went.
Great post, the part of the WT that irritated me was the 1919 claim backed by no scriptural support whatsoever!!
I wouldn't usually want to admit this, but I think those leaving the jws will understand, I was moved to give to a reputable charity today, first time in years. The last time I did it my extreme jw husband criticised me, saying we can only trust our money with the brothers. Yes it's just a drop in the ocean and maybe it's not hands-on help because I can't manage that right now, but what difference could it make if those 8 million people switched their time and donations to such charities! It made me realize as witnesses we are taught to distrust and look down on charitable work when those workers such as medicins sans frontier, Red Cross, oxfam etc should have our admiration for trying to alleviate some suffering now, just as you highlight in your post!
(btw on a side point, I skipped the meeting and went to the pool hahaha)
