Posts by Khepri

28

The psychological effects of faking dubism

by LtCmd.Lore in

jw
friends

well, i've known the truth about the witnesses for over two years.

and i've been pretending to be one ever since.

i'm sure most of us did that for a period of time, some longer than others.. i think it has changed my personality, especially since i've been a teenager the whole time.. .

Khepri

Hi LtCmdr

47

Bill Cosby, seems to be right.

by free2beme in

jw
friends

i work for a telecommunications company and in so doing, i deal with a lot of fraud.

now, what i am about to say could come across as racist and i hope people read the whole thing to get what i am saying and know i am not racist (... to add though, i really am past caring what people think).

in the state of north carolina, you can run up your phone bill to $1000's and $1000's and by law you only have to pay basic local service to keep services on.

Khepri

Hi all, just putting my five cents' worth in. You'd think that ex-JWs as much as anyone would be able to see through the racist stereotypes. Plenty of us once feared and looked down on 'worldly people' because we thought they were 'different' from us. Then we left, and realised that the idea of 'worldly people' is actually just imaginary and there is really just a huge diversity of people some of whom are like us in some ways, others not. It's a very human trait to put people we see as different into a group and label them with all the characteristics we think we DON'T have, but its just too simplistic and destructive to be maintained in this globalising world.

Wuzadummy, Indigenous Australians are not given welfare benefits just because they're indigenous. They get welfare because they are systematically disadvantaged compared to the broader population. They get welfare because their average lifespan is 20 YEARS less than white Australians, because their children go to schools where lack of funding means indigenous languages are not taught, and they have to try and learn in what is for them a foreign language (English), because living conditions are so poor that a huge percentage of children have perforated eardrums and partial deafness as a result, increasing their learning difficulties. Because of poor education they get poor jobs (if any), and many turn to alcohol and drugs to fill in their time. Suicide rates are through the roof. Intelligence has NOTHING to do with it. If you ever went out bush with an Aboriginal person who was familiar with traditional ways, you would find that his or her skills and knowledge of the natural world are PHENOMENAL: they can find their way over thousands of kilometres of apparently blank landscape with no map or compass, they have an encyclopaedic knowledge of native plants and animals and their uses and habits, and they can remember stories which go on for hours. Tragically for them many of these skills are no longer passed on to successive generations, and there is not much use for them anyway in the rapidly encroaching modern world.

Please don't suggest that they only get welfare because they're black. It does them a terrible injustice.

7

Canberra Australia

by kelpie in

.

hi all,.

would love to talk to any exjw's in the canberra region

Khepri

Hi Kelpie, don't know if you're still in Canberra as I see your post was a VERY long time ago, but if you are I'd be happy to get in touch. I was disfellowshipped about 5 years ago and used to be in Civic congregation. Send me a message if you're still around : )

39

Suicide

by Nicolas in

jw
friends

i know it's a touchy subject, but anyone here has ever thought of suicide while they were still in the organization?

it seem to me that jehovah's witnesses have a much higher rate of suicide than the rest of the population.

i contemplated suicide myself when i was struggling to get piece of my life back together after being raised as a "perfect little jw" when i was young.

Khepri

Yes Nicolas, I think yours is a very common experience. I was depressed while still a jw (and was also brought up a perfect little jw like you) but didn't really realise it, just thought I wasn't studying enough (ha! what a joke). After I was disfellowshipped it got worse and I once attempted suicide but I didn't really want to die. But of course if you lost pretty much your entire social circle like many jws who are disfellowshipped, of COURSE you going to be miserable for a while! But it gets better, really. Every now and again I'm sad about losing touch with my family, but I realise now that that's a life I've left behind and I have no intention of returning. I think the most important thing is to make friends outside the organisation - do whatever it takes: join clubs, do organised social stuff, it might feel weird but until you make those friends it's hard to understand what a bizarre, distorted view of the world the jws have.

Best of luck, don't take life or yourself too seriously, and have fun whenever you can : )

46

I need some serious informational help from EVERYONE!

by Thedirtysecret in

i am new here and i joined honestly to collect information to understand something a little better.

my boyfriend, well-now kinda boyfriend (were at a weird place) is a jehovah's witness and i am not.

he waited a little "far" into our relationship to tell me he was, which created a mess, honestly an emotional dyfunctional mess.

Khepri

Hi there,

Firstly, everyone's situation is a bit different, but in my experience it's not possible for a JW/nonJW relationship to be really happy, at least not without some serious compromises from you. How can it be when it is a religion that believes all non jws will die at armageddon if they don't convert before then? My mum is a jw and my dad is not, and while he's always been very much in love with her and would never think of leaving her (and she would never think of leaving the organisation) I feel that he his life has been quite miserable in a lot of ways because of it. He has very few friends apart from jws who he doesn't really enjoy being with because they are always trying to preach to him. He doesn't do much with his life because he knows my mum thinks that any 'worldly' pursuits are pretty worthless. I feel very sad for him sometimes, because he is a genuinely lovely person, but also I'm angry at him for not making a stand about some things.

On the other hand, I know from personal experience that for a lot of people it is EXTREMELY hard to leave the organisation because of the social pressure and guilt. They are so insular that venturing out into the world can seem very daunting. It sounds to me from what little I know about your boyfriend that maybe he would like to leave the jws but is too afraid. You see, it's not the kind of religion that you can 'half-do' - you're pretty much either in or out. Yes he probably would be disfellowshipped if he moved in with you without marrying you, but if he married you and proved to them that he really wanted to stay in the religion he might not be. If you married him and he stayed a jw I'm afraid you'd be setting yourself up for a lot of unhappiness, because they have to put their religion first, even before their families.

I really hope it works out for you, but whatever they say their religion DOES break up families, I know that because I'm in one. My mum still talks to me occasionally, but my extended family (and there are a lot of them!) who are nearly all jws haven't spoken to me in years, when we used to be very close.

Best of luck, maybe your situation will be different but please be very careful what you commit to.

PS religious scripture can be used to justify all sorts of things, but jehovah's witnesses know the bible inside out and will only accept their interpretation of it, because they believe they have god's spirit. If you take them on on that level, you have no chance, trust me!

14

its a new day, its a new life and im feeling good!!

by student1 in

i have finally moved out of my home with pioneering jdub, its been a rollercoaster few days.. hence my delay getting back to jwd... .

i got glassed in town on a night out on saturday!!

(wrong place, wrong time... have stitches but am ok)... i started uni on monday.. exciting stuff!

Khepri

Good luck mate! I started uni not long after I was d'd, but really couldn't get into it for the first year - was too screwed up in the head. Now it's all good, but it was one hell of a ride. Although being disfellowshipped (rather than just kind of fading away) was incredibly traumatic at the time, now I'm happy that it was a clean break and I don't have to make excuses not to talk to any of my former friends if I happen to see them (although my Mum still insists on giving one of the local elders my phone number and I don't have the heart to tell her that I don't want to talk to him because I never want to go back - that's my issue I still have to work out). So don't be too afraid, I'm sure you can cope with whatever happens. It's a terrible cliche but time really does heal everything.

It's a huge exciting world out there (especially if you were brought up a JW as I was) and there is so much to learn and try. You don't have those ridiculous worries now that you'll die at armageddon if you do something! But a word of advice: don't go too crazy as I did for a while and do things which hurt your health or happiness. They are the most important things, and the health and happiness of the people you value most. BTW this doesn't mean ever compromising your integrity - ie going along with something you don't believe in to please others.

Ha ha preach preach - I became a mum at the beginning of this year (which has been wonderful) so now I feel like I have the 'god-given' prerogative to offer good advice to people!

Happy new day and new life and I hope you keep feelin' good ; )