Since the memorial is coming up soon and its about time for me to go shopping for a new memorial ( aka easter) dress, I've realized what the memorial really is for us teenage girls, a beauty pageant! The memorial is the day I spend painting my nails, curling my hair, and carefully applying makeup because my mother says I have to "represent Jehovah" and look my best. In reality its just to impress the newcomers and to compete with the other girls. Have any of you ever experienced this? I don't understand why jws make a such a big deal about appearances, isn't Jehovah supposed to care about what's on the inside? :)
BlackWolf
JoinedPosts by BlackWolf
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The memorial beauty pageant
by BlackWolf insince the memorial is coming up soon and its about time for me to go shopping for a new memorial ( aka easter) dress, i've realized what the memorial really is for us teenage girls, a beauty pageant!
the memorial is the day i spend painting my nails, curling my hair, and carefully applying makeup because my mother says i have to "represent jehovah" and look my best.
in reality its just to impress the newcomers and to compete with the other girls.
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Making friends in the "truth"
by Jordandemm inwhat is it about making friends in the organisation am i the only one who had found it tough?
don't get me wrong there was some good people but unfortunately there was also a lot of egotism, back stabbing, jealousy and gossiping.
i could never really fit in any group, everytime i thought i had found a group it was as if i would be sidelined or ditched.
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BlackWolf
Dude I know how you feel. Im 16 and the only "friend' I really have is a 50 year old sister at my Cong who I go ride horses with sometimes. People don't like her either because she still hangs out with her worldly family and actually does fun stuff instead of going out in service all the time. I've given up on making any new friends at the hall because the other kids are all judgemental, hypocritical idiots! I've never been anything but nice to any of them but they still treat me like an outcast even though I've never done anything wrong! Really Jehovah's witnesses are some if the worst people I've ever been around. -
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I dont know how i can leave my family!
by BlackWolf inmy mom and i were talking today about how next summer i will be 18 and she said that just thinking about it might make her cry.
that made me think about how much more it would hurt her if i quit being a jw.
i really do love my parents, i know they are just being cruelly manipulated by a cult and that they really think they are doing what is best for me.
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BlackWolf
Thanks everybody :) -
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I dont know how i can leave my family!
by BlackWolf inmy mom and i were talking today about how next summer i will be 18 and she said that just thinking about it might make her cry.
that made me think about how much more it would hurt her if i quit being a jw.
i really do love my parents, i know they are just being cruelly manipulated by a cult and that they really think they are doing what is best for me.
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BlackWolf
My mom and I were talking today about how next summer I will be 18 and she said that just thinking about it might make her cry. That made me think about how much more it would hurt her if i quit being a jw. I really do love my parents, I know they are just being cruelly manipulated by a cult and that they really think they are doing what is best for me. That is why I am so afraid to leave. I want my parents to love me and accept me, I don't want them to think I am a bad person or fear that I will die at Armageddon. But at the same time life as a witness seems so unbearable! I have so many dreams beyond knocking on doors and being a good little jw girl! I want to truly be myself and live by my own rules, and have friends who accept me for me, not who the watchtower wants me to be! But that seems like such an impossible dream :( Do you guys have any advice that could help? Thanks :)
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Should I get babtized?
by BlackWolf ini know this sounds like a ridiculous question but i was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again.
she told me that jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether i am babtized or not so i have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything.
my parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness.
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BlackWolf
Thank you everyone. :) -
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Should I get babtized?
by BlackWolf ini know this sounds like a ridiculous question but i was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again.
she told me that jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether i am babtized or not so i have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything.
my parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness.
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BlackWolf
Thanks everybody!! I will not get babtized. Its just hard to feel like the bad sibling in the family because my younger sister got babtized at 11, yep 11!!! So my parents expect me to be mature enough for it too. They also don't care that Jesus was babtized when he was 30 (their excuse is that people lived longer back then lol). But oh well nobody can force me.
P.S. just so this is clear, I am a girl! :)
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Should I get babtized?
by BlackWolf ini know this sounds like a ridiculous question but i was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again.
she told me that jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether i am babtized or not so i have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything.
my parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness.
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BlackWolf
Well im actually a girl lol. I also homeschool so I literally have nobody other than my immediate family to talk to, it's starting to drive me crazy. But yeah you guys are right, getting babtized will only cause me more pain. I feel so lost. :(
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Should I get babtized?
by BlackWolf ini know this sounds like a ridiculous question but i was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again.
she told me that jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether i am babtized or not so i have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything.
my parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness.
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BlackWolf
Yeah thanks your right. Its just really bothers me when they go on and on about it. Oh well. I've lasted this long I just have to last two more years. -
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Should I get babtized?
by BlackWolf ini know this sounds like a ridiculous question but i was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again.
she told me that jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether i am babtized or not so i have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything.
my parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness.
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BlackWolf
I know this sounds like a ridiculous question but I was talking with my mom in the car today and of course we got on the topic of getting babtized again. She told me that Jehovah holds me accountable for my sins regardless of wether I am babtized or not so I have no reason to be holding back because it won't change anything. My parents are the type of super strict jw who will shun you just for not being a witness. That's what they do to my aunt, she was raised a witness but never got babtized so they view her the same as being disfellowshipped. This is what will happen to me once I leave so I figured things might be better if I just get babtized and enjoy being accepted for the rest of my teenage years. Then when I leave I will disasociate myself and things wouldn't be any different than if I hadn't gotten babtized in the first place, I just wouldn't have to endure as much nagging and would be more accepted by the others at the hall for the time being. I hope that if I get babtized maybe the other witnesses will like me more and I can actually make some friends, even if they aren't 'real' friends at least it would be better than nothing. Anyways, what do you guys think I should do? -
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Im sick of my life
by BlackWolf insorry but i really feel like i need to rant right now.
recently my dad was made an elder so my family has been doing a lot more "theocratic" activities lately.
every morning i wake up and put on my itchy dress and stupid makeup and heels and then pretend that i love what i'm doing and that everybody is my friend when in reality i feel horrible and all the other teenage girls at my hall hate me for some reason.
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BlackWolf
Thanks I will try harder to think positive. Especially right now since I just spent the whole day being indoctrinated at an assembly. Every time I go to an assembly/convention it becomes more and more unbearable but I just try to imagine it as a test of patience and strength of will that might benefit me someday. :)