Just noticed this too. Glad you're still with us. It's good to get ideas as to planning the exit strategy. Lots of good suggestions here already, especially playing up the stressed, depressed, etc mode, elders are tired of dealing with that.
The ball is in your court, you have the power now that you know the manipulation behind the curtain. Remember that when someone tries to play the heavy hand. Do whatever you can to safeguard your cherished relationships. You will have to be cunniing. Play by your rules now.
That elder who told you that you weren't following procedure by texting him your time and you gave him a smart answer. Well, if he calls you on it, just say something like you know Br Jerk stress can cause a person to react in different ways.