Posts by sadfox

21

Being Shunned

by sadfox in

jw
friends

i knew this day was coming but i thought somehow there might be a loophole.. i had my "last supper" with my daughter on monday.

i am disfellowshipped, her father and i are divorced, he is a witness, she lives with him and will be 18 on sunday the 5th.

therefore as a baptized witness, she can no longer visit me and must keep communication to the bare minimum.

sadfox

Thank you all for the words of wisdom and comfort.

I can tell you without a doubt, as I told my daughter, that I will not go back into that organization just because they won't talk to me. I will not live a lie, I already did that for 34 years. I would never consider being part of an organization that teaches that God has no mercy. That is why I left, they made me feel like I was so bad that God's forgiveness towards me had reached its limit.

I have a deep faith in God, it's just not their faith. I am doing my best to turn this over everyday, to find ways to keep myself busy and in the moments I get to speak to my daughter, I will tell her I love her and that I am here for her. This is a crucial time of her life, her senior year in high school. There is a lot going on. I am taking advantage of the one-on-one time with my 16 year old, something we have had very little of. We do not talk religion, but I imagine that will come up soon enough.

My ex-husband, in the beginning da'd himself. He badgered the kids, who went to meetings with my parents, to give it up and celebrate christmas with him. I was already df'd but did not celebrate anything with them. The girls gave in and we had christmas at my house, then, on christmas day at his house, he announced he was going back to the organization and since they lived with him, they must go back too. Talk about a rollercoaster!! But I have to admit that my oldest daughter was relieved, she was uncomfortable celebrating her birthday and holidays. In some ways I can only blame myself, I started out raising her to be a witness. Guess I did a good job, huh?

I don't know how things will play out. I am trying to keep my faith in God and in whatever his plan is.

Thanks again for all your kind words and helpful advice. I will keep it all in mind and things go along.

21

Being Shunned

by sadfox in

jw
friends

i knew this day was coming but i thought somehow there might be a loophole.. i had my "last supper" with my daughter on monday.

i am disfellowshipped, her father and i are divorced, he is a witness, she lives with him and will be 18 on sunday the 5th.

therefore as a baptized witness, she can no longer visit me and must keep communication to the bare minimum.

sadfox

I have been very careful not to even discuss religion much less to try to reason with them. I don't want to burn any bridges. I want them to come to me if they ever need to leave. I grew up as a witness, stayed one until I was 38. I have learned so much about what I was taught and how much of it was lies and cover-ups. It is scary to think they are heading down the same road.

21

Being Shunned

by sadfox in

jw
friends

i knew this day was coming but i thought somehow there might be a loophole.. i had my "last supper" with my daughter on monday.

i am disfellowshipped, her father and i are divorced, he is a witness, she lives with him and will be 18 on sunday the 5th.

therefore as a baptized witness, she can no longer visit me and must keep communication to the bare minimum.

sadfox

I really need some help. I knew this day was coming but I thought somehow there might be a loophole.

I had my "last supper" with my daughter on Monday. I am disfellowshipped, her father and I are divorced, he is a witness, she lives with him and will be 18 on Sunday the 5th. Therefore as a baptized witness, she can no longer visit me and must keep communication to the bare minimum. She is very strong in the organization and although I know it hurts her cause she loves me, our goodbye was so emotionless. My other daughter also lives with her dad but is not baptized yet and is just turning 16 this month. Being divorced 18 is the magic number, I have rights until they are 18.

I have friends that are trying to help me through this but they are not familiar with the Witnesses and it is hard for them to fathom that anyone would believe that God would be so mean as to expect them to cut off their mother.

Any helpful advice on how to get through this??

Thanks

20

So, What Do They Cut Next?

by metatron in

jw
friends

as to future cutbacks in jehovah's progressive organization, i see these:.

once again, dump the awake completely.

's have observed that this doom and gloom scandal sheet needs defending.

sadfox

I heard they are combining the bookstudy and school/service meeting so that there will only be on weeknight meeting and that they are shortening the public talk to 30 minutes all starting in January

6

Explosion at KH

by TweetieBird in

jw
friends

i don't know if anyone posted this yet.. http://www.myfoxkc.com/myfox/myfox/pages/sidebar_video.jsp?contentid=7071944&version=1&locale=en-us.

.

sadfox

My daughter called me last night to tell me of a friend working to repair the damage at this Kingdom Hall and he verified that the man was a brother, though not sure if he was in a position of authority or not, and that he did spread gasoline all over the building, set the fire and killed himself. I would think since this person is there cleaning up and doing repairs that it is pretty reliable.

27

Join Me In Welcoming SadFox

by snowbird in

come on, now.. she needs our tlc.. sylvia.

sadfox

Thank you all for the welcome. However, I don't know where my being from Alabama came from, I am in the mid-west. Sorry if I misled anyone.

The hardest part about posting here is the guilt I feel towards my family. But then they will never even look for a forum like this-that would be welcoming in the devil.

I may complain here or I may vent my sadness, but I do not want to bash anyone. Everyone has to make their own choices. But I am tired of feeling that I am the bad one who is in this situation because I made the wrong choice. I know I didn't.

So, thanks again and bear with me at times.

31

What Draws Out The Lurker/Newbies

by Not Feeling It in

jw
friends

i'm sure this has been discussed.

i was wondering what attracts a lurker/n00b to post for the first time.

i made my first post in someone else's thread eschewing the "hi, i'm new" thing.. for anyone, particularly the lurkers/noobies:.

sadfox

I was looking for information on the Kingdom Hall explosion in Missouri and happened upon this forum. I posted the same day.

I am in a situation where I left, had no friends out side the organization and all of my family is involved with the witnesses. Like some one else posted, it is hard for anyone that has never been inside the organization to understand what leaving means. So I thought I might find some to talk to that have been there, done that. I am very much alone and that is difficult.

I do lurk, but post when I feel I need to or am looking for feedback.

22

Faded away about 4 years ago

by SurfsUp in

jw
friends

hi i wanted to say hello, this is my first day on this forum.

i am 40 years old and was a jw from birth.

i am living in georgia and have lived in florida too.

sadfox

Hello,

I was a witness from age 2 to 36. My parents are still witnesses, dad was an elder until recent heart problems forced him to step down. I am now 43, divorced and my 17 year old is a baptized witness and my 15 year old plans to be. Because of the faith difference they chose to live with their dad. Two years ago I joined a different faith, simply because it made me feel closer to God, closer that I ever have.

So, I hear from my parents once a year. My oldest girl will stop coming over in two months when she is 18. I have had trouble the past few year making friends. So I am alone 95% of the time when I am not at work. I have been through depression, 5 years ago considered suicide. But know that is not the answer. So I am working through it with a couple of really good friends.

I do not want to really bash the witnesses. All of my family are witnesses and no matter what I love them. Not too mention the guilt factor, I am still struggling with that.

Anyway, it's nice to meet you all. Would appreciate any encouragement.

157

suicide and explosion at Kingdom Hall on Sat. July 27

by kool aid man06 in

jw
friends

a bizarre explosion at a church east of kansas city killed one man on saturday afternoon.

atf agents said the explosion at the jehovah's witness' kingdom hall on foggy bottom drive was intentionally set, and that the person who died appears to have committed suicide.

witnesses described large amounts of smoke pouring out of the building, which they said was just recently completed.

sadfox

beksbks: thanks for the welcome. I still feel guilty talking about this. I mean I love my parents deeply and obviously I would give my life for my girls, so that is where the guilt comes in when discussing the hurt, confusion and well basically the lie I feel I led all those years.

mcsemike: I have not been thru the horror you have been thru. My father was an elder until just recently his health caused him to step down. I have had discussions on the subject of pedophiles and the like with him and how they are instructed to handle it. I have asked do they report it to authorities. He told me it depends on state laws. I asked what that meant, why wouldn't you want to put a stop to something like that. I don't believe he ever gave me an answer. Yet the Witnesses are the first to blast catholic priests for this crime. But you and I both know that it goes on in their organization as well. I bet there is not a religion out of the 1200+ religions in this country that don't experience these problems, and I would bet the cover up goes on in each situation.

How do I get by without my kids? I can go to their weddings, but not the reception, I can go to graduation, but not have a party for them. I can be there for the birth of my grandkids, but they may or may not let them spend time with me. I am so trying to trust in God and the one or two very special friends (I consider them angels since the saved my life by God's will) to get me through this. If God is love, where is it in their organization? Where is mercy and forgiveness? Jesus sought out the sinners and the sick when he was on earth, he did NOT shun them in any way.

Pretty sad. I am now 43 and am wondering if I will always be out here alone, afraid I will die alone. All because, in the name of God, my family thinks this is the way to show love.

157

suicide and explosion at Kingdom Hall on Sat. July 27

by kool aid man06 in

jw
friends

a bizarre explosion at a church east of kansas city killed one man on saturday afternoon.

atf agents said the explosion at the jehovah's witness' kingdom hall on foggy bottom drive was intentionally set, and that the person who died appears to have committed suicide.

witnesses described large amounts of smoke pouring out of the building, which they said was just recently completed.

sadfox

Yeah, right. "All they have to do is walk away...go and live a different life". I am here to tell you how it is no where near that easy. I left the church at 34 (my parents converted when I was 2). I had no friends outside of the church, weren't allowed to. I got divorced, my ex left too for a while, we have two children. Over the past 10 years my ex went back, took the girls with him (now 17 and 15). My parents call me once a year to see if I am okay, I have not talked to my only brother his wife or seen his kids in almost 2 years, and that was only when my father had open heart surgery, before that it was 3 years. My oldest daughter will be 18 soon, is a baptized witness and will not come to my house for dinner once she is 18, my fifteen year old will do the same when she is 18. As I stated, no friends out side the church and now 10 years later very few friends. It is difficult to leave a life you have know your entire life and just "go and live a different" one. Suicide was a consideration about 5 years ago. However I have since found a religion I am affiliated with and have a better relationship with God now than I did in all my years as a witness. So, when I am down thinking about what is coming up for me and my girls I try to focus on God, he must have a plan. But please, don't ever think that leaving that organization is easy cause it is not.