he is my stepson and my wife has legal authority in virtually all of the decisions that involve him
And that's why you should stay out of it unless you discuss it with her first. If someone tried that behind my back backstabbing bullshit that you're talking about with one of my child, I'd kick your ass to the curb. You'd be out of my life that's a fact.
I'm an atheist and believe we are constantly evolving, so that's not the point.
It's not about the subject matter, it's about crossing boundaries. It's none of your business unless the mother says so.
I apologize if this sounds harsh.