SW my thought is just who your husband is local to, you and family or the crazies at the hall? He says he would have to turn you in, that shows whom he would be more loyal and it seemingly is the apostate governing dictators. Those supposed friends at the hall would not be your friends if you aren't attending, may take awhile but eventually it will happen, then you will find out true friend in the Borg as they won't abandon you.
Is your husband so enamored with being an elder that it's more important to him than family?