@Konceptual and @confused
It is so much easier when you resign from being an elder. But you have to resist the urge to help your ex elders especially if there are few elders. You can feel guilty.
Step one is to get your wife to accept you are the way you are without running to the elders. Hammer home points you think will make her give you a free pass at home. E.g. Child abuse/generation/parents getting old, sick and dying even though they truly believed they would be in paradise by now.
Do they really want the same for their kids? Kids are paramount to most women.