Wednesday 29th December 2016 GB meeting.
Losch: "Ve must get ze yaaarbook on zer jborg, it is vot ve do."
Lett: (Gurning) "Brrrp ding whoo! Whoo! I agree!"
Tomo3: "We can't publish the numbers! It's GOT to make me look good (like my sons do!)"
Jackson: "Look guys - if we publish the numbers as they are we will show a 0.5% decrease; we know that some of the shut-ins spoke to somebody in the last six months, why don't we add those in? Can't you come up with something Splaney?"
Xplain: "Evidently we could assume that ... if we assume that just one inactive shut in per congregation spoke to someone that would give us (scratches on paper with pencil) ... 130,000 multiplied by 1 = err, umm ..."
Lett: "Yuk yuk! Bingo! (Eyes bulge and jaw drops as he raises a finger) A hundred and thirty thousand!"
Sanderson: Why not round it up to 144,000!? That's a Theocratic number. Add it on and we'll have about 8.3 million so about .5% increase!
Tomo3: Then we spread it across just the western world to hide their decreases! All in favour say "Aye!"
All: "Aye!" "
Tomo3: "And we'll publish first week in January!"
Lett: (Smiles stupidly and nods vigorously.)