Hi Magwitch
Sorry for your loss.
I have noticed their is a lot of phychology involved with recruiting and keeping people in once recruited. I remember my first meeting and the love bombing . I now recognise all the manipuation that went in to my recruitment and as the saying goes with friends like that who needs enemys.
I was trying to understand the behaviour of the elder(Who telephoned you). I remember at a service meeting once the congregation was encouraged to place the "What happens when you die" booklet to people mourning loved ones at graveyards. The elder who phoned you in my mind saw this terrible event as an opportunity to reach you at your lowest ebb. The fact that he never rang you back to apologise is something he will only confront should he leave the organisation for consciouse reasons.
Acolytes