Posts by GLTirebiter

20

How do you go on when married to a JW who doesn't want to be a JW

by marriedtoajw in

i've posted on here a few times under the screen name of sahara but had to change it, long story... anyway i've posted some of my story being married to a jw for twenty years with four children, none of whom are jw's or are studying to be one.

i've stated on my other posts that i've done lots of research on jw's and watchtower history, i don't think there is anything about the history and tactics of jws that i haven't personally come across or studied, though i could be wrong.

people who are not intimately familiar with jw beliefs and practices seem to view them as strange simply because they don't celebrate holidays or salute the flag etc, but those of us who are more familiar with them know that there is far more than meets the eyes of casual observers.

GLTirebiter

I struggle still to give them a pass on this but, well I do...

Yes, it is hard hard to stay sympathetic to the victims when the organization they follow is so contemptible. If you've managed to keep it together as the UBM for 20 years, give yourself a pass too--you've earned it!

Being married to a JW for as long as I have, there have been many land mines I've had to manuver through in just keeping my family in tact while trying to hedge all the JW stuff ... Fighting that monster has become more than a 12 round slug fest taking body blows and hooks from different directions while never really throwing many of my own. Biting my lip and strapping my tounge to the roof of my mouth to keep the peace has been more than draining.

Walking on eggshells every day is draining. I thought that was the worst part, taking all the verbal shots while knowing that any response in kind would only makes things worse. One thing we UBMs have in common with the DF'd and DA'd is the experience of being considered the enemy, an outsider in our own family. It brings a clear understanding of what it means to forgive "seven times seventy" times.

Why would she do these things if in fact she wants to be a JW?

That's hard to say, it could be many different things. She might feel that by making accomodations to you and the children that she is holding the family together. It may be a little act of rebellion for her, tasting the forbidden fruit. Or it may be a taste of normalcy that helps her cope with the Watchtower pressure. Perhaps she is mentally "out", but can't quite let go because she fears the reaction from other JWs. If you ask her about it, there's a good chance she can't tell you why; she may not really know herself. Switching between a Watchtower personality at the Kingdom Hall and a genuine personality elsewhere causes that confusion.

You can't force her to change; she has to want it herself. So the best you can do is love her no matter what, and show her that you do.

Good luck to you and all your family!

260

Are you sure leaving the JW religion has made your life better?. Lurkers think twice

by mankkeli in

on this forum, i have carefully read most of the experiences of those who left the jw religion, i have even read experiences that have dated back to 2001, i have read the different circumstances surrounding their exits and what ensued upon leaving.

for the majority, i observed they are better remainning in the religion than leaving.

what benefit is there to strain family relationship because you want to be free?, please tell me, of what value is that freedom?,.

GLTirebiter

My message can be consummated with a proverb that goes this way "The devil we know is better than the God we don't know".

So, are you admitting that you follow the devil instead of God?

Are you saying it is better to cower in fear of the unknown than to explore, to examine, to verify "whether these things are so"?

I think it's sad that anybody would be so scared that they would prefer to stay in the darkness than to seek the light. It is more so when you recognize that the darkness where you hide is a lair of evil. Becoming familiar with it breeds contempt for its dangers, complacency for the price it carries. As Alexander Pope wrote:

Vice is a monster of so frightful mien,

As to be hated needs but to be seen;

Yet seen too oft, familiar with her face,

we first endure, then pity, then embrace

When you recognize that you are in the wrong place, your most important goal is to GET AWAY!

37

Is this an anti-JW website?

by keyser soze in

jw
friends

when i registered here over 4 years ago i thought it would be a good place to interact with like-minded christians who loved jehovah as much as i do.

but after reading some of the posts on here i'm beginning to believe that the sentiment on here is largely anti-witness.

i justed wanted to tell you all what vile and hateful people you are..

GLTirebiter

No, this is Faithful and Discrete Slave's specially approved web site, where special pioneers go for advanced training in defense against false religion. Where else could they go, to learn how to resist ear-tickling opposers when they are out in field service six days a week? Until you can survive at JWN, you aren't ready for work in unassigned territory. Posting on JWN is as good as a college degree in Apostate tactics!

43

Hello - new

by freshstart in

jw
friends

hi, just wanted to introduce myself.

born-in, as was my husband.

we were both baptized as teens, married when we were teens (he was early 20s) and we were both the "perfect" witnesses.

GLTirebiter

Freshstart: what an appropriate screen name! Welcome, and congratulations to you and your husband for not bringing your child up as a slave to the Watchtower. It sounds like you both realize the truth about THE TRUTH, and now can look forward to a rewarding life together. I hope you enjoy the forum, and will be around here for a long time to come.

86

This site is a bad site! I am ashamed that i have joined!

by MsPassach in

i am so ashamed that i joined this site!

i thought that i would meet people here that honour jehovah here.

insread most of the people here are not here for the service of god.

GLTirebiter

i thought that i would meet people here that honour Jehovah here.

I honor the Lord, the Christian God. His name is not "JEHOVA"; that is a translation error made centuries ago by a Catholic monk. The Hebrew name, represented by the English letters "YHWH", would be pronounced approximately as "Yahweh" in English. But we are not equals on a first-name basis with God and are commanded not to use the Lord's name in vain, so it is traditional (going back to Old Testament Hebrews) to use the title "Lord" instead as a sign of subservience and respect. In fact, assuming the vowels for "Adonai" (Lord) went with the consonants of the tetragram (YHWH) led to the corrupt translation "Jehovah".

insread most of the people here are not here for the service of God. they don't know what it means to honour Jehovah. most of them show by their actions trhat they are in the service of man and not the service of Jehovah. For them the service of man is more important than being loyal to the Creator of mankind...

Consider this carefully: whom do you serve, the Lord or a publishing corporation in Brooklyn, New York? Do you take directions from the commandments and the sermon on the mount, or from Watchtower magazines?

This site should feel so ashamed to carry the name of JEHOVA because this is definitely not a witness to Jehovah.

This originally was a pro-Watchtower site. That changed with time and exposure to other points of view. Hang around if you wish, if you dare--there is much to learn that is not printed by the Watchtower Society!

14

Is There A Sin That Is Justifiably, For Excommunication Or Shunning?

by AvocadoJake in

i know this question is a "slippery slope.

" but i am wondering if you belive there is a sin, that merits excommunication?

i vote child molesters and rapist and murding (a unjustifiable murder, serial killers, outright evil by community standards.

GLTirebiter

It reasonable to "boot" somebody from the organization, provided it is done in a fair, evenhanded way. But WT disfellowshipping goes far beyond mere removal. It includes encouraging members to cause emotional pain to those in the organization's bad graces, and effectively slandering them with a public announcement at a meeting where the accused is likely to be present. The literal wording of the announcement is innocuous ("Tirebiter is no longer one of Jehovah's Witnesses"--not that I ever was!). But the sinister connotation those words have to those hearing them ("Apostate! Fornicator! Bad Association!") conveys a different meaning--a case of loaded language.

The WT policy on disfellowshipping has not always been so extreme. Aussie Oz has documented the history of how this policy has changed through the years, which you can read at freeminds.

14

Is There A Sin That Is Justifiably, For Excommunication Or Shunning?

by AvocadoJake in

i know this question is a "slippery slope.

" but i am wondering if you belive there is a sin, that merits excommunication?

i vote child molesters and rapist and murding (a unjustifiable murder, serial killers, outright evil by community standards.

GLTirebiter

There is an important distinction between disfellowshipping and shunning, as practiced by the Watchtower and other high-control groups, compared to excommunication as practiced by most major religions.

On one hand: treating somebody as if they did not exist, limiting contact to "necessary family business", "hating with a true hate" and humiliating a person by publicly announcing their status as a grave sinner (thus seeding the local gossip grapevine with unfounded speculation about what the accused might have done). On the other: excommunication means limited participation in some religious rites, no restrictions on dealing with the person in everyday life, maintaining normal family and social contact, and limiting disclosure to those with a genuine, legal "need to know"--not making the situation a matter of public speculation.

The watchtower presumes the authority to dole out public punishment and humiliation; others seek to correct while leaving public punishment to the law of the land. What sins deserve a Watchtower-style shunning? I can't name one. Which deserve the more traditional excommunication? Offenses against the community of believers: acts of sacrilege, heresy, and the like. For offenses punishable by the law of the land, neither is appropriate: "Render unto Caesar" is the proper response.

17

Who is Homeschooling - what works and does not?

by skeeter1 in

jw
friends

my in-laws really wished they had taken control and homeschooled their one granchild.

today, i witnessed a middle school bus stop bully and another group of teenaged girls smoking something illegal.

my 5th grader is headed to middle school next year.

GLTirebiter

Unless you can teach well and have the time to do it.....don't homeschool your children!

I agree with that--and would add commitment to the list (see my previous post on this thread). Home-school parents have no monopoly on ineffective, uncaring teaching. Unfortunately, some teachers in traditional schools are merely marking time, going through the motions but accomplishing little in the way of education. You've had them, I've had them, and our kids have some of them too. You know who they are: they use the same lesson plans, assignments and tests for at least a decade, and are famous among the students for being easy graders. They are equivalent to home-school parents who toss their kids some workbooks and say the job is done. Both are do a disservice to the children entrusted to them.

(and he IS an opinionated curmudgeon)

There's nothing wrong with that! (RIP, Andy Rooney: America's best-known curmudgeon)

100

MOTOWN HITS ,,,, we need another music thread!!

by talesin in

personal favorites?

post the youtube .... .

i've been chatting with a friend, and lilstening to this tune ... i grew up listening to all the great mo'town hits, and this is one of my favorite songs ever.

GLTirebiter

Martha and the Vandellas

17

Who is Homeschooling - what works and does not?

by skeeter1 in

jw
friends

my in-laws really wished they had taken control and homeschooled their one granchild.

today, i witnessed a middle school bus stop bully and another group of teenaged girls smoking something illegal.

my 5th grader is headed to middle school next year.

GLTirebiter

Look for a local support network that can arrange some field trips, curriculum help, state achievement tests, and compliance with the laws in your area. We have used both an independent home-based school and a "virtual academy" operating as a charter school in a nearby school district. Both of these worked well, but be sure to check into the quality of the academics and support system before you sign up. There are good ones and there are some that do as little as possible.

Several math programs are available, but also many awful ones. I agree with PaintedToenail's recommendation for Saxon math texts. See the reviews at mathematically correct to compare math programs.

The most important part of home schooling is your involvement. It is a lot of work for the parents; the patience and discipline to do that work every day is important for your child's educational progress.

I wish you the best if you choose home schooling. It is a lot of work, but it can bring tremendous rewards too!