Fernando

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Posts by Fernando

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  130

  Involved with a JW woman

  by jonza in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  okay so i'm dating a born-in jw woman, she's younger than me and has no kids.

  i'm a christian man whos divorced with 2 kids.

  we're in love and seriously want to be together.

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  Fernando

  As others have said there is a lot to weigh up.

  Humans and relationships are complex.

  Building a secure relationship is a process.

  Given your orientation, the most secure relationship with your GF it seems to me will be built on "unity in Christ" (the gospel) instead of "unity in doctrine" (religion).

  I wonder if your GF would be willing for both of you to patiently explore the liberating (unabridged) gospel (according to Paul) in her own publications?

  DF or not, if she remains a captive of the Watchtower/religion, your relationship will never be secure, and your children will be highly vulnerable.

  PM me if you'd like a 1-page summary of the gospel in their publications.

  Yes, it can be found in their publications, albeit in fragments.

  Tellingly though, the gospel is not in their hearts nor on their lips.

  Blessings

  Fernando

  South East Queensland, Australia
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  14

  What was the "theme" of each decade?

  by ILoveTTATT in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  if you could list the major themes of the watchtowerland per decade, what would they be?.

  for example, 2010-2014: overlapping generation, gb=fds, jw.org, 100 years.

  2000-2009: harder stance on higher ed.. 1990-1999: generation no longer a major doctrine.. 1980-1989: getting over 1975, ray franz, year of peace, end before 20th century ends, generation is 70 years old.

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  Fernando

  What millie210 said.

  Great definition, perspective and synthesis the big picture, gingerbread.
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  40

  Are you a good person?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  something happened this week to make me think about this again.. it feels like all bets are off and i really don't know what a good person is anymore.. when i left the jws i was so sure i knew what it meant to be a good person.. this has been revised many times since.. i tend to favour the utilitarian approach, the greatest happiness for the greatest number of people.. sometimes you have to stick your neck out and say this is not good for me no matter what others may feel they need from me.. no idea where i'm going with this maybe this is a breakthrough in my life or maybe that glass of wine was stronger than i thought!.

  any thoughts?.

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  Fernando

  A good observation I believe, Xanthippe.

  I was however thinking of CBT which it seems distinguishes normal/rational thinking from aberrant/irrational thinking.

  In CBT aberrant/irrational beliefs lead to aberrant/irrational thinking, which leads to aberrant/irrational emotions and feelings, which leads to aberrant/irrational behaviour, and finally destructive/unhelpful outcomes.

  In extreme cases the behaviour would include the likes of road rage, senseless violence, divisive sectarianism and shunning, murder, rape, incest, legalism, moralism, ethnocentrism, racism, sexism, and supremacist Gnosticism.

  ---

  BTW I believe the video is making a very different point. To me it actually seems to be an anti-moralism, anti-legalism, and anti-self-righteousness message. The video it seems portrays religious people being shocked, scandalised and offended by the last guy, the worst offender of all, being accepted, on the basis of grace, despite all the religiously untoward things he must obviously have done with his penis (especially receiving oral sex).
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  40

  Are you a good person?

  by Xanthippe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  something happened this week to make me think about this again.. it feels like all bets are off and i really don't know what a good person is anymore.. when i left the jws i was so sure i knew what it meant to be a good person.. this has been revised many times since.. i tend to favour the utilitarian approach, the greatest happiness for the greatest number of people.. sometimes you have to stick your neck out and say this is not good for me no matter what others may feel they need from me.. no idea where i'm going with this maybe this is a breakthrough in my life or maybe that glass of wine was stronger than i thought!.

  any thoughts?.

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  Fernando

  According to both Psychology and the Bible we are all dysfunctional (fall short of a perfect standard).

  Just to varying degrees.

  The "Good News" especially according to Paul is that a right and clean standing is imputed as a free gift by grace.

  This opens our heart up to the transforming power of love.

  We are gradually regenerated, and naturally become "good" or at least better than before.

  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrLzYw6ULYw
• 
  36

  First post after a year or two of lurking on this site-Sorry for the length!

  by Pattytheperfect1 in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  not sure of the point of telling my story, but just got off the phone with my grandma and i am so angry, stressed and i don't know what else...i guess i just wanted to hear from someone other than my husband that i'm not crazy for my reaction to family interaction.. my condensed story gramatical errors and all :).

  father was a born in jw, mother was a convert.

  i was born the last of 3 siblings and shortly after my birth in 1981 my parents divorced.

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  Fernando

  Welcome Pattytheperfect1!

  Congratulations on standing up and saying this is wrong - calling them out on their hypocrisy.

  I believe what you are now (finally) doing will be very cathartic, empowering and healing for you:

  • openly telling it like it is;
  • insisting they quit abdicating responsibility;
  • insisting they stop rationalising the consequences of their appalling actions;
  • no more voiceless victim.

  They are very wrong.

  You are absolutely right.

  While the Watchtower does not care for scriptures in their own Bible that do not suit them, many here on JWN do:

  (Proverbs 17:15) . . .Anyone pronouncing the wicked one righteous and anyone pronouncing the righteous one wicked—even both of them are something detestable to Jehovah.

  Greetings

  Fernando

  PS - My wife's situation is very similar.
• 
  36

  The Ray Franz Movie

  by RayPublisher in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  been wanting to talk about this for a while... three years ago on this forum my friend cedars brought this up.

  let's do it!.

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sykaxxpyos.

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  Fernando

  What a fabulous idea, and brilliant suggestions.

  As above: do it already!
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  19

  I need some moral advice?

  by trex2strike in

  1. social
  2. relationships

  okay, i like to hang out with these twelve other guys a lot, but recently one of them---i call him josh--(to help protect his identity) as started being a bit of a jerk.

  he just decided that he was the leader of the group, and i'm not 100% comfortable with that.

  and he expects us to treat him like he was god or something.

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  Fernando

  Had me fooled.
• 
  21

  I'm a bit confused actually.

  by quellycatface in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm not i like the "happy clappy" bits and pieces in church (c of e).

  it's just not me.

  the local school choir came in today and did 2 songs and one was a rap song about easter.... that's so not me.. i like serious but not hellfire preaching.. any ideas where to next?

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  Fernando

  How to Explain Simple Organic Church in 2 Minutes on a Napkin

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-147JgJ3ZJs
• 
  21

  I'm a bit confused actually.

  by quellycatface in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i'm not i like the "happy clappy" bits and pieces in church (c of e).

  it's just not me.

  the local school choir came in today and did 2 songs and one was a rap song about easter.... that's so not me.. i like serious but not hellfire preaching.. any ideas where to next?

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  Fernando

  Have you looked into house church or simple church?

  Every member functioning.

  Spiritually active, not passive.

  No hierarchy.

  No denominationalism.

  No sectarianism.

  http://www.site.house2house.com/about-h2h/welcome
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  16

  drunken thread about my niece's JW wedding , my non jw sister and gay nephew impressions,

  by Miss.Fit in

  1. jw
  2. experiences
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  Fernando

  Was your nephew a JW before?