I have found that these things must multiply in the dark every time I think I have found the last leaflet, brochure and book I clear out a cupboard and find more of the things.
It is an amazing feeling clearing out the clutter.
Posts by nugget
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16Hooray! Bound volumes in the trash!
by stillin inmy wife has held onto them like they were family heirlooms.
we are cleaning and clearing out accumulated stuff and i pointed out that there is the cd-rom library now and that the society has made revisions and really doesn't want us to be reading the old stuff.
she said that even though there have been changes to the teachings, the wrong understanding served its' purpose at the time.
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16
Christmas Eve Best Wishes To ALL of you .
by smiddy3 init`s christmas eve here in australia today and i wish all of you a very merry xmas simply because i can without being zapped , or hauled into a jc committee.. it doesn`t matter whether you are religious or not , i`m not now , however i can appreciate and respect those who do.. so whatever your views on the matter have a great day and enjoy the holidays in whatever grabs your fancy.. and if jw`s do come knocking on your door as they do this festive season wish them a merry xmas and anti-witness to them ..
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nugget
Happy Christmas to one and all.
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38
How do I handle this?
by Phoebe ina little advice please.. it's now 7 months since i stopped going to meetings.
we still get regular calls by elders - at least every 2 weeks.
i can handle them.
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nugget
I wouldn't respond. A fade is at risk if you interact with members of the congregation. You have doubts about the faith and witnesses are very sensitive to people who are not totally committed. You could potentially set off all sorts of warning bells especially if this person's relatives are already doubting your spirituality.
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Dealing with Elderly Parents Who Still Believe the jw Religion is the truth
by lancelink ini left the religion back in 2008 right after my mother died,( the total lack of natural love/ affection was the final straw for me).. but my dad has become more and more focused on doing the wt bidding.. it just amazes me how he gushes on and on about the last days, his new bible studies, and meeting parts .
but yet he makes no effort to have any type of relationship with his grandkids, there are 5 of them , non are witnesses.
they are the children from several different sisters of mine, and myself.. so how do you deal with the witness stuff always being presented in conversations?.
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nugget
My mum is 80 and doesn't attend meetings as she is housebound. She believes the organisation is the truth but because she hasn't been to meetings she believes what she was taught when she joined the organisation. She hasn't kept up with current thoughts or changes and doesn't believe me when I tell her about the changes.
Generally we avoid talking religion she is totally in denial anyway. She is sorry that I inherited diabetes not sorry she introduced me into a cult and messed with my life for 40 years. What can you do?
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41
What woke you up?
by MrRoboto infor me, i think it was just the right time as i was starting to wake up on other fronts as well (anyone who had went through these will know what i mean).
but it started when i was looking for what info goes on a publisher card, which led to me reading one person's story (ex bethelite) which was pretty crazy to an all-in jw but who trusts those apostates...?.
then i started watching videos on cults, as if my subconscious was trying to tell my concord mind something... when i saw a particular one about a young man in lds getting ready to start their 2 year preaching campaign, including a school, social activities etc, i realized that i couldn't tell the difference between the folks of this mormon cult and the jws (save for some religious differences) .
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nugget
It was a gradual process and started after I had children. I started to look more closely at the materials especially as my son has Aspergers and found some of the material distressing. I looked at what I was expected to teach my children and was unhappy with the idea that they should not celebrate any achievements as this would be boasting. That they should always trust the elders, have no ambition or hope other than that taught by the organisation and have no friends outside the organisation.
As it happened I could see that my son was seen as odd by other witness children they were not kind to him or were his friends. The meetings were torture for him as he couldn't sit still and would be taken out frequently for discipline by his father. In the end I took him out myself to the backroom looking stern and then let him fidget to his hearts content. He struggled in field service and would be vocal and speak up if he was uncomfortable or bored and other witnesses couldn't understand why he couldn't be made to be compliant. I could also see how the witness life was affecting my daughters self esteem negatively. At assemblies other witnesses were selfish and unkind when my son reacted to the loud noise of the feedback from the speakers and told us we were ruining their enjoyment and they would have to move. I told them not to bother we were going home. There were countless small acts of pettiness and casual cruelty that went against the idea of a spiritual paradise. I couldn't allow my children to experience the same humiliations and restrictions that I had as a child. They deserved to have happy and fufiling lives. My son would never fit into the witness mold and the elders agreed.
While this was happening my husband was having his own doubts and got me to read "Combatting cult mind control" and "crisis of conscience". Both these excellent books put the final nail in the coffin and we left as a family.
Although we had different reasons for leaving we were both convinced that we made the right decision. We had to weigh up what we would lose as a family and we have lost some family and friends against whether we could live a lie for the sake of keeping the same family and friends. In the end the children were more important and in order to allow them to grow as people we had to give up something from ours. We have been lucky, we have made new friends and connected with old ones, we have become closer to family members who have also left and some who were never witnesses. It takes work and effort to rebuild a new life but it is worth it.
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45
Britain Branch to Cease Printing Sooner Than Expected
by The Searcher ini've received the following news from a reliable and trusted source: .
the demise of printing literature in the u.k. is being brought forward by one year - to march 2018. graphic design and printing support will go too.
large numbers of "disposable" bethelites will now have to make their own way in the world, when their "mother" abandons them.
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nugget
If printing is going why do they need to build such a big facility outside London? Seems like an unnecessary expense.
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44
The Latest Trend in NW England: Homeschooling Your Children
by pale.emperor ini dont know if this is becoming a national thing or even globally.
but im hearing more and more people i knew from my jw days have taken their kids out of school to home school them instead.
in my sisters case she's taken her 8yo and 6yo children out already and her 3yo wont ever start a school.
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nugget
I work at 2 schools so know how much effort goes into educating children. It is not something that should be half arsed.
Damage can be done to a child's long term prospects if they are not taught properly. It may also cause them harm if they try to reenter mainstream later as they may have gaps in their knowledge which will impact on how they absorb new information as there may be an assumption that they know something they don't. Some lessons build sequentially so missed steps can mean they struggle to take on more complex ideas.
Unless the parents are motivated and committed and well educated these children will struggle to get any education at all.
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37
Just curious - is apostasy grounds for divorce?
by LifesNotOver ini know only adultery is supposed to be grounds for "scriptural" divorce.
i'm a wicked apostate in their eyes, but my believing husband and i still can't get a divorce that would allow him to remarry.
we currently are separated - i have left him.
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nugget
you can get a divorce and do as you please. It is your ex who is happy to follow their rules and your ex who may feel he cannot remarry.
Part of the benefits of leaving is that your private life is now your own and is entirely your own business. I can understand that if you have affection for your ex you may wish to assist him on moving his life forward but don't be in a hurry to make such a decision. It is unreasonable and demeaning to keep your Ex and the elders posted about your sex life and would not be expected of any normal divorce arrangement.
Part of starting afresh is thinking afresh.
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25
The J.W fishpond of marriage mates! How many of us married a idiot!! No choice.
by Witness 007 inwhat a horror.
instead of there being "more fish in the sea" our marriage mates came from the small and crapy witness pond.
anyone got burned by going with mr or mrs you will have to do?
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nugget
Saw it happen many times. I didn't marry in haste and was lucky. Of course if cantleave posts that he married an idiot I will take it all back.
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Update: Got my Judicial Committee cancelled
by Sanchy inoriginal thread here.
update: so, after the meeting i had with elders a few weeks ago as outlined in my original thread, they met as a body and once again called to tell me that after considering my case they still thought a judicial committee should be held against me and asked to be there "thursday at 7:30".
all of this, i remind you, because of posting coc on facebook.
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nugget
I am glad you were successful. However be careful what personal information you post as this is a public forum and I am sure that this thread would be seen as a breach.