Posts by Joyzabel

28

Hello...ex .jw. intro & background.

by Nigel in

jw
friends

my name is nigel.i am 50,married with five kids,early teens to late 20,s.i live in the bush in australia.i have cruised this site for a couple of months & feel comfortable enough to talk now.those of you who were long term jw,s will understand that.only my direct family know what i am about to tell.i have never told anyone else as they would not understand.i was born a jw in the u.k. and some of my first memories are of going door to door.i was scalded when i was 4 & i remember some brothers coming to see me.my parents emigrated when i was 13 as my dad didn,t get on with the inlaws.my dad drank a bit at home at home & was violent.it was never spoken about outside of the family and at 15 i left home.i was the eldest of four.i continued to go to meetings,lived on my own & learnt a trade.at 20 i married a good jw girl as was expected & became a regular pioneer.i was a good public speaker & as far as the congregation was concerned had a bright future.i believed in what i was doing as it was what i had been taught.when i was 22 we had a baby & was witnessing one sunday morning & was involved in a head on car accident in a 60mph zone.my wife & son were minor injured but i was lucky to survive.i had many bone fractures & head injuries & i did not know who i was,what had happened,nor recognize my wife or child for 3 months.i was in hospital for 6 months.i was unable to do anything for a year.by this time i was in financial difficulty & due to this & my mental state grabbed what i could get in court,which was not much.during this time no one helped...no one.i continued to go to the meetings but my heart was gone & the downhill slide had started.over the next 7 to 8 years i worked a normal job but started to drink & by mid 80s was not attending meetings.my wife was a good jw & did not understand my feelings.although i had much respect for her & still do,by this stage we had 3 kids,& there was a chasm between us.i knew that i was affecting my wife but she would never divorce me.so i figured the best way was to give them all the reason not to want me around.i was called to the meeting & i told the elders how i felt & that even i did not know why.disfellowshiped.fair enough.we divorced late 80s.she married an elder.i married a so say worldly person.about 3 or 4 years later my new wife & i had 2 kids & were getting along fine.i had started talking to dad but i did not want to go back to meetings.my dad was disfellowshiped for smoking & could not give it up.he became ill & very depressed.he overdosed on anti depressants.my mum knew what he had done & left him on the floor for 24 hours before calling an ambo.she rang me when he was dead.i don,t talk to her any more.she remains a jw.no comment.my sisters are jw,s.

nobody talks anymore but.three weeks after dad died my brother had a lot of problems,financial,legal & grief.he was only 29.he shot himself.i buried two in three weeks.and so began a new chapter in my life...violence.and baby wasn,t i good at it.i king hit everyone within arms length for a year.didn,t lose a fight,the anger was immense.did the maximum weekend detention,lost my job,my second wife took the kids & went.

understandable.i held a gun in my mouth so hard i bled for two days.but i couldn,t do it.i love my present wife & kids & i believed that jehovah would understand & forgive me when i die.i did my best with what i was given.from that day i never looked back.i fixed it up with my wife & we get on great.my three oldest kids to my 1st wife are jw,s but i see a bit of them.my wife now hasn,t much time for religion.understandable.she is a nurse.i don,t work any more.i still look outside & appreciate what god has done for us but i don,t need other people to feel that.too much damage done.i don,t slag the witnesses nor the wts.their business what they do.i just don,t agree with the procedure of df,s and the climate of fear & guilt.i have seen much & will contribute where i can.you seem like a decent bunch.good luck to you all.nigel

Joyzabel

Welcome to the board, Nigel.

Glad you find us "a decent bunch". Hope you can stay and heal or joke around with us, too.

Joy

37

Joy and Steve and all others in the way of Ivan

by blindfool in

jw
friends

.

just wanted to let these great people know that i'm thinking of them and hoping they stay safe.. .

bdf

Joyzabel

Are vehicles allowed to drive on the beach there where you live?

With a permit. You know those guys who do the beach chairs, beach patrol (lazy, huh, to drive up and down the beach). But no driving today.

Watch out for Jeanne

12:45 CDT, water only to the fence still with the bigger waves. Raining now.

Joy

37

Joy and Steve and all others in the way of Ivan

by blindfool in

jw
friends

.

just wanted to let these great people know that i'm thinking of them and hoping they stay safe.. .

bdf

Joyzabel

I hear ya, Myself. That's why all the outside furniture and possible projectile missles have been secured indoors.

The waves are so hypnotic. I'll try to keep taking pictures but 2-D just doesn't get the sense of the height and power of the waves.

Right now the waves are so high that you cannot see the horizon behind them. Sitting on the first floor, they are over our heads but crash and level out before the wash up to our picket fence. Yes Mike would be standing in water now.

Nina, the core of our house is cement block. It was built back in '49, so we know where to go to stay out of the wind. But I tell ya, the tidal surge is very scary looking. Opal went through the whole house and out the front doors. (Steve had boarded up and moved furniture, but still everything got wet).

AND we will leave it the storm turns towards us. We are no fools.......well.........that's debatable. lololol

I'm just glad I got my mom to leave her home this morning. She lives on the east side of Moble bay. Talk about direct hit and bad side of the storm.

*back to staring at the waves*

to Sixer. lol

Joy

ps to Steve E.-- NO COOKIES

37

Joy and Steve and all others in the way of Ivan

by blindfool in

jw
friends

.

just wanted to let these great people know that i'm thinking of them and hoping they stay safe.. .

bdf

Joyzabel

lol Marilyn. You are my worry-wort now.

Yes they announced "mandatory evacuation" but the are NOT enforcing it. They, who are responsible for the evacuation announcement, know we will probably only have tropical storm winds and tidal surges when it hits land where we live. The thing has really moved to the west. It's New Orleans (low elevation) and everything east of Mobile Bay that is going to get hit worse.

Now, if it turns our direction tomorrow, don't worry, we'll be over the bridge before the bridge gets closed. (55 mile an hour winds close the bridges around here).

You know we won't take any chances, but we are not invloved in a fear based religion anymore and tend to look at facts and not sensationalism. Notice how the weather station shows the worse winds and hurricane situation when discussing the current storm. Notice the catch phrases "it will still be a devastating storm" when the storm is losing power. Remember, they want you to watch their station, so they have to hold your attention.

But thank you everyone for your concerns.

Joy of the "there is a price to pay for living on the beach" class.

37

Joy and Steve and all others in the way of Ivan

by blindfool in

jw
friends

.

just wanted to let these great people know that i'm thinking of them and hoping they stay safe.. .

bdf

Joyzabel

Thank you (((BDF)))

We are watching it closely. So far the eye looks like its headed towards Mobile Bay. So hang on those over there.

In the meantime we are watching wonderful long rolling waves.

Tomorrow will be another story.

Hugs,

Joy

37

Long-time lurker introduction

by Momof4 in

jw
friends

i wanted to say hello and introduce myself.

i am probably one of the longest lurkers here ever.

i've been lurking for almost three years now, and i enjoy reading a lot of the posts.

Joyzabel

Welcome Momof4!!!!

*secretly waving and you know why*

Glad to see you have finally found your voice. Enjoy the fun.

Hugs,

Joy

5

thanks

by sometimeleft in

jw
friends

i"m taking this time to thank all for welcoming me to the board.

this is more welcome than i got at the kh on most occasion lol .

i have lots to tell but don't know where to start -and don't tell me : " from the beginning " lol.

Joyzabel

Welcome to the board (you and your wife)

Now hang on for the ride.

When I first came here with my doubts, it was great therapy for me in adjusting to life outside of a high control group. Someone said to give myself at least 2 years to adjust. And they were so right.

Read anything you want to. Satisfy whatever your questions are. But give yourself time to rebuild who you are, friends, interest, etc. There is no hurry, there is no deadline. So relax and enjoy your new journey.

Hugs,

Joy

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