Thank you, Sabastious!! That feels real good. You know I won't be getting much more kudos from others in my life.....so it feels GOOD!
My response to the letter was:
The very fact that they are talking to you--which damages my reputation--shows that they do not love me.
If they loved me, they would show it. They would do what loving people do. They would offer to help. They would state their concern. They wouldn't silently pull away from me and talk about me behind my back.
How does involving yet another person--you--help ME??
But, I can tell you, it does HURT me.
Benevolent intentions means nothing. "The pathway to hell is paved with good intentions."
Hitler had "good intentions" too. You have to look at the behavior. Is it helpful or not? Well, their talking , to YOU, is not helping ME, is it. Actually, it defames my character, a civil crime. Why is it a crime? Because it can cause material damage in my social circle, can't it. People can choose to withdraw from me as a result of these shared conversations. I could lose my support system, my family and friends. That is social murder--ostracism. I could be effectively disfellowshipped, without ever being so, simply based on hearsay!
Instead of socially murdering me, they need to come to me and offer their words and actions of love and concern. Wouldn't that be more productive? And it also protects my reputation. "They seem to think I am falling away from the truth and they want to help but don't know how." This is very funny Danitia. Please. We are talking about a very long process of neglect, over several years, even recently. They do nothing but heap more pain on me.
But when the candle is about to break, they say, "oh, what can we do? It is almost going to break. We don't know how to be loving, because we haven't been up to this point, and caused this whole mess. Now it is at urgent level, and we don't know how to fix it. Maybe we can destroy that last little flaxen? Will that work? (Actually it will.) By destroying that last little flaxen, they effectively remove responsibility to solve the problem they caused. If the problem is now gone (I leave the truth) then they don't have to be loving. They win.
It solves a very difficult problem for them, nicely. They never wanted to be loving in the first place, which is what caused this whole problem. But, the only way to solve it, is to show love. They still don't want to do that, so what to do? Now they look bad, especially since they claim to be Christ's follower, yet they are not doing the most important sign to indicate they are his follower: love(John 13: 34-35).
So, how to get out of this incriminating situation? Well, they could just show love, but that is too much work for them. Rather, boo-hooing about their "concern," while knowing that flaxen will finally break off in neglect, is the perfect solution. The flaxen breaks off, so they no longer have to do anything about it (problem solved) and they look like "good guys" to the ones they boo-hooed too (you.) Notice the difference between the Pharisees actions and Jesus. (Mathew 23:1-7)
"Then Jesus spoke to the crowds and to His disciples,
2saying: "(B)The scribes and the Pharisees have seated themselves in the chair of Moses;
3therefore all that they tell you, do and observe, but do not do according to their deeds; for they say things and do not do them.
4"(C)They tie up heavy burdens and lay them on men's shoulders, but they themselves are unwilling to move them with so much as a finger.
5"But they do all their deeds (D)to be noticed by men; for they (E)broaden their [a]phylacteries and lengthen (F)the tassels of their garments.
6"They (G)love the place of honor at banquets and the chief seats in the synagogues,
7and respectful greetings in the market places, and being called (H)Rabbi by men."
Jesus:
28“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11: 28-29)
Thus says the LORD:
Here is my servant whom I uphold,
my chosen one with whom I am pleased,
upon whom I have put my spirit;
he shall bring forth justice to the nations,
not crying out, not shouting,
not making his voice heard in the street.
a bruised reed he shall not break,
and a smoldering wick he shall not quench,
until he establishes justice on the earth;
the coastlands will wait for his teaching. (Isaiah 42: 1-4, 6-7) So, some people like to pile burdens upon people, and when the people are struggling and crying out against the unjust, intolerable weight, they refuse to adjust the burden, even in the slightest way--with their pinky! Much less, using their arms, back and legs to help carry the burden, or even remove it entirely. Meanwhile, they like the broaden their broaden their phylacery (the little book of the law they wore on their forehead to show how pious they were) and lengthen the fringe on their skirt (another sign of being set apart as holy, but they have to LENGTHEN it, to emphasize how holy they are). And, they want the honour and respect and have the chief seets in the synogogues. All this means, they want to look good in front of others, and go a long way to get there, yet they won't actually DO GOOD, by reducing the burdens of the people. They are all for SHOW, and empty. That is why Jesus said to not copy their ways.
Then, there's him, our examplar. He actually REDUCED the load of the people, refreshing them. And knowing some were as tired out and broken down as a smoking candlestick wick, he wouldn't even put it out. He'd TAKE CARE to protect and preserve it.
You can see the correlation. One is all about looking good while neglecting the needs of the people and adding to their anguish, and the other is about protecting and preserving the people.
I know who my real friends are, and my my real Christian brothers. These others? Their actions speak for themselves.
Imperfection doesn't come into it. That is a "get out of jail free" card, for those who don't want to put in the work to actually be loving as Christ instructed.
Being imperfect is no excuse. If it was, then there'd be no recognizable sign, of who Jesus followers were. Remember, he said, "By this all will know you are my disciples?" He was talking about his imperfect followers, being able to perform that sign. So, if they cannot perform it, they are not his true followers. Whether they claim "imperfection!" or not. Wait a minute. Do they claim they "want to, they just don't know how?"
Wow, you've got to be kidding. For people who've been following Jesus for how long? And they don't know HOW? They don't know how to SHOW LOVE??
Well, if you can't show love, whether its from inability--as they claim--or simple unwillingness, they're still disqualified. If you don't show love, you're not Jesus follower. Simple as that.
And, going to someone YOUNGER then them to learn how to be more loving, someone with less years of experience practicing love, and following Jesus, is a real laugh!
Why go to YOU?? Shouldn't they go to God in prayer, and go to Jesus in the bible? Shouldn't they ask for help to be more loving, reading about Jesus ways in the bible, seeking to copy his example? Won't he have the best ideas? And how about asking God for holy spirit? Love is one of the fruitages.
This going to you is a sidestepping of solving the problem. While simultaneoulsy "looking good."