Posts by happyexjw

30

Finally dared to register

by Hoffnung in

finally i registered today.

being a lurker for quite some months, i convinced myself it is time to give my own 2 pence from time to time.

i am living in europe and i am still 'in', although by now i must be counted as an inactive jw.

happyexjw

Welcome, you will find a lot of support from here, I have

106

Flying to Orlando tomorrow, my daughter is in the hospital

by coffee_black in

jw
friends

my daughter is in the hospital with pneumonia, and possibly a blood clot in her lung.

they'll be testing through the night...apparently, her heart is enlarged as well.

she is scared... and if her jw father catches wind of it, he will be there trying to intefere with her treatment... he lives close by to her, so i'll be flying down in the morning....to head him off at the pass.

happyexjw

My thoughts and love go to you and your family. Wishing your daughter a speedy recovery

51

My Dad's passing

by happyexjw in

quite a while ago i wrote about my dad who has been living with prostate cancer for 13 years with secondry bone cancer for the last 2 years.

we all thought he was going to leave us back in april when he had a bad chest infection.

i was talking about wanting to be able to say some words at his funeral.

happyexjw

Thank you all for your words of comfort. Flipper I was that close to giving her a piece of my mind but then realised that that is probably what she was wanted to turn it around on me show my mum how wicked and wordly I was....and that is what stopped me. I was not going to stoop to her level of thinking, like i said earlier she mader herself look the wicked one all by herself and my mum has seen the lack of love and empathy shown....my auntie is the one who has planted a little seed in my mums thoughts.

My brother was told by a JW, "this should now make you want to come back to the religion" my bro said "no way", she said "well dont you think you owe it to your dad". GUILT trip!!! Also my cousin who I have not seen in years but came around to my parents the night my dad passed, sent a card with a messgae to me and my bro & Sis saying that it was lovely to see us and she would like it to be forever, but its up to us, we left them not them leaving us, We need to find inner peace and that can only happen when we come back to the borg. WTF....if they were so concerned about us why leave if years and until my dad passes for them to tell me how they miss me. Unbelieveable, if they just could realise what they are saying....what makes me proud though is how far I have progressed with my thinking and the way I see life today with a lot of credit to this site. This site has been a great support to me with my awakening, even though I was D'fd years ago, my mind was still in it untill about 2 years ago when I started to question things. So I would like to thank JW net and all the members for their contributions to threads.

I would like some advice when it comes to the funeral, I am sure I will get a few people say to me about coming back or not seeing my dad again in paradise blah blah blah. I would like to give them a response thats not nasty but will make them think, a response thats a converstion stopper, then smile sweetly and walk away.

Any ideas?????

xxxxxxxx

51

My Dad's passing

by happyexjw in

quite a while ago i wrote about my dad who has been living with prostate cancer for 13 years with secondry bone cancer for the last 2 years.

we all thought he was going to leave us back in april when he had a bad chest infection.

i was talking about wanting to be able to say some words at his funeral.

happyexjw

Thank you all so much for your kind words my dad was a true character adored by many believers and nonbelievers. Im dreading the funeral but just like mum want it to go peaceful and give him a good send off, I promised him I would do him proud with the funeral arrangements, fulfilling all his wishes.

I will be smiling nicely and talking kindly to all who have come to pay their respects for dad.....if they start on me I will just walk away from them. My aunt and uncle dont need anyone to make them look bad...they do it so nicely themselves!

Again thank you, your words bring me comfort.

xxx

51

My Dad's passing

by happyexjw in

quite a while ago i wrote about my dad who has been living with prostate cancer for 13 years with secondry bone cancer for the last 2 years.

we all thought he was going to leave us back in april when he had a bad chest infection.

i was talking about wanting to be able to say some words at his funeral.

happyexjw

Quite a while ago I wrote about my dad who has been living with prostate cancer for 13 years with secondry bone cancer for the last 2 years. We all thought he was going to leave us back in april when he had a bad chest infection. I was talking about wanting to be able to say some words at his funeral. Well after a brave fight, sadly my dad passed away on Friday 5th November, and im missing him terribly.

My dad came into the JW cult shortly after my mum, they have been in for 45 years. I was born in along with my brother and sister, my sister is disfellowshipped though still believes they hype of the belief, my brother has been inactive for 2 years he has been doing his research and can see it for what it is. I am disfellowshipped, have been for 17 years. I was also abused by an elder when i was 7 years old, this was swept under the carpet. I think thats why I ended up getting disfellowshipped, I never got the proper help that I needed at the time, I lost my way whilst a teenager.

Over the last year I have been in councilling for what happened, I began to ask questions to my parents, wanting some answers. This caused problems within the family, being called apostate by my mums sister. But my parents and I sat down one day and talked and listened to eachother, they understood my viewpoint and acknowlegded that what happened to me was very wrong, that day we all made peace with eachother.

My dad wanted to pass away at home, so my mum was caring for him ( she is the most amazing lady!), we all helped her in this. I knew on friday when I was there he was starting to leave us, that evening with my mum, brother and me were holding his hand and gently talking to him, reassuring him it was ok he could let go now, we would be fine, we telling him how much we loved him. Shortly after he took his final breath. It was so quick but beautiful that he died in with his family there holding him.

My brother and I stayed with mum all night, the following morning an elder comes around to see my mum, now this is the point where the cold harsh reality of the borg kicks in. Obviously we were all so consumed with our grieveing that the thought of and hatred for the borg didnt even enter my head. I opened the door to this elder and welcomed him in, offered him a cup of tea and enjoyed listening to his funny stories with my dad in field service etc. The time came for him to go and I saw him to the door. As he was about to step out he turned to me and said " I think we should come around and see you in a few days and have a chat, you are too much of a nice girl to not be in the truth". WTF...now a little bit of background history with this elder, he was the one my parents went to tell of my child abuse, he was the one who questioned me then told my parents that as it happened a long time ago ( i was 7 when it happened and 11 when i told my parents) there was nothing they could do.

So when he said that I thought you cheeky bastard..I replied with " Thank you terry for that offer, however that organisation nearly destroyed me and I couldnt go back to that way of thinking again" he said "Well it was only one person tried to destroyed you" I confirmed to him that it was the 'organisation!' then said that "not only that, I have done my research on the history of the organisation and have come to realise that it is not what it makes it self out to be" " however terry if you would still like to come round and see me and have a chat, your more than welcome". You should have seen the face on it, I dont think he could have run from the door so quick. GO ME!!!!!.

My mum asked what he said and I told her she thought he had a cheek saying it was just one man that tried to destroy me. I explained to her that I thought he was being insenstive so soon after dad passing that he now wanted to chat with me about the religion. She said that he only wanted me to have the hope of seeing dad again. I reminded her that this was the first time in 17 years that I have seen him, if he was genuinely concerned about my welfare/ wellbeing surely he would have made an effort to see me at some point in the 17 years, she agreed.

To make matters worse my mums sister came that afternoon, she and her husband are JW's he is a MS. They were in the living room whilst I was in the kitchen sorting out the flowers in a vase that I brought mum. I could here my uncle talking about creamations and how they are like cattle markets and how they burn bodies together and you dont get the ashes of your loved one. My dad decided as he was nearing his death that he wanted to be creamated, orginally he said that he wanted to be creamted with a memorial service at the KH after, but after our chats he decided that all he wanted was a service at the crematorium and thats was it, no service at the KH...nothing. So my uncle was being very insensitive talking like this in front of my mum so soon, it was cruel, as he was trying to make my mum feel bad about not having a KH service. So I kindly asked him to change the subject as I thought this was not the time or place. Well all hell broke lose after that, my aunt said to my mum..."see we didnt start anything" my mum started crying and I went to comfort her, my aunt wouldnt let me near her, she looked at me then at my mum and said "dont worry helen, she just doesnt understand" I asked what she meant by that then got a lot of verbal abuse when i said that I have just lost my dad and so i do understand. She called me selfish, how she had known my dad longer than me, how its my fault they are not close to me, how I was a problem child, how i didnt care about my dad. Then my uncle gets up and says to me how terrible i was questioning the religion while my dad was dying, he said that I used to be a lovely person with a heart and now I am cold and nasty. He said that they both decided that they were not going to talk to me when they arrived, but only decided to talk to me after I offered them a cup of tea, which was exactly what they did....WTF!!!!. When I told him how I did love my dad he screamed at me and said BULL.

My dad has not even been gone 24 hours, where was their love and compassion, it was unbelieveable. Sorry but I really needed to sound off, with people that understand the evil thought processes of the JW cult. Its quite funny actually, if I was ever thinking about coming back (which I never would) their so called loving actions would have put me of straight away.

Its such a shame that they are so blinded that they cannot see and dont know how to show genuine love, true compassion because all their natural feelings have been squashed out for their wrong, oppressive thinking.

What is also strange how my dad was so worried that I would take my mum away from the truth with my new thinking, but at the end his last words to my mum was "you can do what ever you want with you life". Maybe when he was in his last moments he saw his mum there waiting to meet him, and in that moment he realised that what he was being taught was wrong, as he was moving into another world.

Thanks for reading.

RIP Dad xxxxxxxxx

32

Elders Wives/kids

by exwhyzee in

how many elders wives or kids have looked at the congregation files without their husband/father knowing about it?

anyone here have any knowledge of this.

how foolish anyone is to go to these people if they keep a written record/file on you.

happyexjw

Exwhyzee - Apologies for diverting from your thread

32

Elders Wives/kids

by exwhyzee in

how many elders wives or kids have looked at the congregation files without their husband/father knowing about it?

anyone here have any knowledge of this.

how foolish anyone is to go to these people if they keep a written record/file on you.

happyexjw

Wannabefree - I respect what you are saying and I dont want to hijack this thread but I would like to respond by saying of course they would feel uncomforatable and of course you would feel awkward as its not natural to ask intimate questions about another persons sex life, because this is personal to the couple. Any NORMAL person would not show such an interest in another persons love life in everyday life by asking was it the left breast you fondled or the right...did you touch/ suck her nipple etc, etc, out of respect for person you are talking to, you just wouldnt do it otherwise you would be regarded as some sort of pervert.

As you said its an Organisational mandate.....the biblical mandate is based on the actual sin itself not whether a person rubbed genitals on the outside of the clothes or not . What is natural is the way our bodies are designed, we are natuarally designed to procreate, we are inbuilt with these bodily reactions to a touch, kiss etc. Intention or premediation does not come into it especially in a loving relationship, unless your being abused or raped then it would be classed a premeditated or intended..but if a couples body's naturally respond to eachothers touch or kiss and our natural response it to procreate then there is no premeditaition involved. You said its to define the serverity of the sin, as sin is a sin which ever way you look at it. What the elders should be more concerned with is did it happen or not and if they are repentant or not, the rest should be your consience between you and Jah.

Like you said you have not been the subject to a JC, so have never been put in that unatural situation, but i am sure there are many on here that can relate to that hummilating degrading questioning, especially when you see them at the KH the next week.

Im sorry but in my personal opinion, they have no rights to ask such intimate details, they certainly dont ask each and individual step a person took to smoking, like the way you touched the cigarette packet, did you pull the cigarette from the middle of the packet or the side of the packet, did you caress the cigerette as this is irrelvent, they just want to know did you smoke or not.

It is wrong, not needed and can affect a person emotionally and psychologically.

Happyexjw

32

Elders Wives/kids

by exwhyzee in

how many elders wives or kids have looked at the congregation files without their husband/father knowing about it?

anyone here have any knowledge of this.

how foolish anyone is to go to these people if they keep a written record/file on you.

happyexjw

What I dont understand is why they need to know all the in's and out's (excuse the pun) in graphic detail....I was in a simular situation to brodan when I was 17, with an elders son. Had a JC round his dads house and the dad sat in on it as well as the 3 elders....can you beleive it....so embarrasing!! They asked far to many intimate questions mostly aimed at me. Why did they need to know... we both admitted it..job done!! but for some reason they wanted to know just as many details as brodan. Wished I had the courage & insight to tell them, yes I did but the intimate details are none of your F'ing business.

I agree with everyone, they definately get of on all the details.....Sick!!!!

Good point magwitch....very simular to pornography.....bet the elders fight it out amongst themselves who is going to sit on the JC to Bro & Sis immorality hearing........compared to dealing with a potential apostate who baffle them with facts, evidence and common sense.

Happyexjw

278

Children of 1975

by d in

what was it like to live in the 1950's 1960's and early 70's as a jehovah witness.when they started to push the 1975 date..

happyexjw

sorry forgot to delete 'when i was in'......note to self always proof read before submitting!!!

278

Children of 1975

by d in

what was it like to live in the 1950's 1960's and early 70's as a jehovah witness.when they started to push the 1975 date..

happyexjw

I was born in 1975 and I remember my mum telling me through out my years growing up when i was in how she was so scared that she would go into labour during armageddon but also how excited she was that I would be brought up in the new system................something which she now deny's ever saying