First SD, glad to hear from my friend :-)
I dont think they will go the endagerment route. It would be extremly difficult for them to call you a danger when you drive your wife and little one to and from the meetings. Dont lose sleep over that.
But you are spot on about the maner of abusers being to tear down and offer a small carrot of warmth. Learn to insulate yourself emotionally and call it what it is: abuse.