Kep

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Posts by Kep

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  34

  The Great Liquor Quiz

  by Beans in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is in response to our district overbeer!

  thanks valis!.

  please list your fav poisen!.

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  Kep

  I guess I'm a bit uncivilised down here, but Southern Comfort straight from the bottle is a bit of me.
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  41

  The Great Beer Quiz

  by Beans in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  there are so many good brews out there and so many countries that produce them.which are your favs?here are a few of mine.. canada: kokanee,canadian,keiths,blue.

  german beer: holsten,becks,diebels,lowenbrau,flensburger pils.

  scotland: belhaven best,tennants.

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  Kep

  Hey Beck,
  Don't forget the classic Steinlager, good Kiwi drop
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  21

  Freaky picture

  by Elsewhere in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  look at the blue thing in the door in this picture... at first you won't be able to make it out, so look closely and very carefully.

  it may take a few minutes, but eventually you will see what it is.. .

  religion stops a thinking mind!.

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  Kep

  That's awesome, you got me good hahahaha
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  30

  Update On Elder Suicide

  by Nat in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  some of you may not have heard about my sister-in-laws brother.

  he was a elder/37/married/no children and my sister-in-law's twin brother.. he took his life a couple of weeks ago.

  no one was sure what was going on or what had happened.

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  Kep

  Nat,
  Please accept my condolences. It is truly a sad thing to lose someone in such a way.
  Although I am unaware of his situation, it seems he was going thru a similar scenario as me.
  It hurts to know this man felt that desperate for an end to his misery that is only the result of borg programming.
  Yeah we make mistakes, sometimes big ones, but as times passes we can pick up and start to put the pieces back together.
  Typical borg response, when you are no good to them you get shafted big time.
  Please be assured that my thoughts go out to you and your sister in law.
• 
  14

  My Story

  by Kep in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my mother and grandmother are dubs, so it was a part of my life from the start.

  both my dad and grandfather weren't, so it was what they call a divided household.. that sucked coz, after the meeting we were hurried off home to please the unbelieving mate.. so i never got to have real friends at the meetings and never had any activities outside of school.. as i got older i began to fit in with the school mates but felt restrained as we always had meetings to go to.. to cut a long story short, i got baptised when i was 18, had trouble keeping on top of meetings and witnessing etc.... i went weak, then inactive, found myself a girlfriend, non-witness, talked her thru the issues and problems i was going thru and so she decided to study.. we got married, she was baptised and things were going good.. as they were always pushing at assemblies to pioneer we felt we had to do that.. so as our circumstances allowed, she began pioneering.. you know, i look back and can say there was so much pressure put on couples who didn't have a family to seek first the kingdom.. as i had a checkered past according to some in the congo, it was a battle to attain privilidges.

  but i worked at it, i would auxillary pioneer each year and use my vacation time to do it, brown nose the co each time he visited, and bend over backwards to do anything the elders wanted done.. and as time passed i became a ministerial servant.. then in order for me to become an elder i had to really work my ass off.. so i did, i sorted things out so i could also become a regular pioneer.. after 18 months of doing that plus continually working hard for the org i was appointed elder.. my family was stoked.. i had a sister whose husband had also been appointed elder, my other sister was a regular pioneer and my brother was living with me and doing as much as he could.

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  Kep

  Thank you for your supportive words and thoughts.
  My journey has been bumpy and hard going, but now I have recovered well enough to tell others about it.
  Some have bounced back so quickly and I wish that was the same for me, but I think the deepoer you get into the Borg, the harder it is to readjust.
  My whole life was there and I firmly believed their ways, even after 6 years of being out I was still one of them inside.
  But I have healed now, but it took something drastic and tragic to happen.
  I feel so much better about life and the things I believe and especially the person I am.
  I guess that's why I felt at ease posting on the board.
  Thank you so much.
  Kep
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  9

  The WTBTS gets disassociated!!! Cool!

  by SYN in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  .

  the earlier in the forenoon you take the sun bath, the greater will be the beneficial effect, because you get more of the ultra-violet rays, which are healing.

  - the golden age

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  Kep

  If only they would feel pain the way they did it to us.
  But it's a step in the right direction.
  Yee Haa
• 
  14

  My Story

  by Kep in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  my mother and grandmother are dubs, so it was a part of my life from the start.

  both my dad and grandfather weren't, so it was what they call a divided household.. that sucked coz, after the meeting we were hurried off home to please the unbelieving mate.. so i never got to have real friends at the meetings and never had any activities outside of school.. as i got older i began to fit in with the school mates but felt restrained as we always had meetings to go to.. to cut a long story short, i got baptised when i was 18, had trouble keeping on top of meetings and witnessing etc.... i went weak, then inactive, found myself a girlfriend, non-witness, talked her thru the issues and problems i was going thru and so she decided to study.. we got married, she was baptised and things were going good.. as they were always pushing at assemblies to pioneer we felt we had to do that.. so as our circumstances allowed, she began pioneering.. you know, i look back and can say there was so much pressure put on couples who didn't have a family to seek first the kingdom.. as i had a checkered past according to some in the congo, it was a battle to attain privilidges.

  but i worked at it, i would auxillary pioneer each year and use my vacation time to do it, brown nose the co each time he visited, and bend over backwards to do anything the elders wanted done.. and as time passed i became a ministerial servant.. then in order for me to become an elder i had to really work my ass off.. so i did, i sorted things out so i could also become a regular pioneer.. after 18 months of doing that plus continually working hard for the org i was appointed elder.. my family was stoked.. i had a sister whose husband had also been appointed elder, my other sister was a regular pioneer and my brother was living with me and doing as much as he could.

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  Kep

  My mother and Grandmother are Dubs, so it was a part of my life from the start. Both my Dad and Grandfather weren't, so it was what they call a divided household.
  That sucked coz, after the meeting we were hurried off home to please the unbelieving mate.
  So I never got to have real friends at the meetings and never had any activities outside of school.
  As I got older I began to fit in with the school mates but felt restrained as we always had meetings to go to.
  To cut a long story short, I got baptised when I was 18, had trouble keeping on top of meetings and witnessing etc...
  I went weak, then inactive, found myself a girlfriend, non-witness, talked her thru the issues and problems I was going thru and so she decided to study.
  We got married, she was baptised and things were going good.
  As they were always pushing at assemblies to pioneer we felt we had to do that.
  So as our circumstances allowed, she began pioneering.
  You know, I look back and can say there was so much pressure put on couples who didn't have a family to seek first the kingdom.
  As I had a checkered past according to some in the congo, it was a battle to attain privilidges. But I worked at it, I would Auxillary pioneer each year and use my vacation time to do it, brown nose the CO each time he visited, and bend over backwards to do anything the elders wanted done.
  And as time passed I became a ministerial servant.
  Then in order for me to become an elder I had to really work my ass off.
  So I did, I sorted things out so I could also become a regular pioneer.
  After 18 months of doing that plus continually working hard for the org I was appointed elder.
  My family was stoked.
  I had a sister whose husband had also been appointed elder, my other sister was a regular pioneer and my brother was living with me and doing as much as he could. But then he was 18 at the time and still finding himself.
  So there we have it, one big happy spiritual family.
  I was busy, working, witnessing and doing all the elder stuff, as well as learning sign language and caring for the hearing impaired in the cong.
  I kept on getting assignments as well and felt loaded and burdened down. Yet I would never say no to anything, to me that was a sign of weakness, that I didn't appreciate the privilidges opened up to me.
  My wife was full on into applying for bethel and gilead, I wasn't into that crap, but went along to keep her happy.
  She was actually very ambitious and wanted to go as high up in the borg as we could.
  So I had pressure from her as well, take on more and more to get on the stage at assemblies etc..
  I think I stressed out.
  I ended up spending time with a young sister, and being with her washed away all the weight of responsiblilty I was carrying.
  In the course of time I ended up sleeping with her.
  I was so stircken with guilt and felt I had let my whole family down.
  The same day I get an assignment for the upcoming assembly, and I just couldn't handle it.
  I sat in my office at work and broke down.
  I told my wife what had happened the next day and that was it, we were off to see the elders.
  So I went along with that, wanting to do the right thing in the Borg's eyes.
  A judicial was held and I told them everything and so I was removed as an elder and pioneer. The following week it was announced that I was on public reproof and that all privilidges had been removed.
  I attended that meeting knowing I had to face the music and accept my medicine.
  After the meeting I had many in the congo come up to me, hug me and assure me of their feelings and support.
  Each week I had to have a meeting with members of the committee and the meeting following the announcement I got slammed bigtime.
  One elder said that a pioneer was announced that night and nobody went to that person, they came to me, and he said it wasn't right.
  I should have left as soon as the meeting finished.
  Well, I was totally shaken by this. I was already beating myself up for making such a big mistake, and then to be told that.
  It spun me out even further.
  The girl had been shipped off out of town to live with her grandfather and so I was stressing about that too. Was she alright?? How did the JC treat her??
  She would write to me and say how sorry she was for ruining my life. I wrote back telling her not to blame herself, it was all my fault etc..
  At another meeting this same elder wanted to know whether I would go and see her again, I said I don't know, I wasn't sure.
  I ended up travelling out of town to see her and spent some time with her, but never did anything, thinking I was safe because I never stepped over the boundry.
  Well, my wife found a letter in my jacket and reported this to the elders.
  Next thing I know I'm up before another JC.
  This time they are at me with accusations that the girls family are putting a non molestation order out on me, that her grandfather was writing a letter to the papers about an elder and a young girl.
  (She was of age by the way)
  I knew none of this and told them so.
  In the end they Df me for conduct unbecoming a christian because as a married man I shouldn't be seeing let alone holding hands with another woman.
  I was told I had a wicked heart and that there was nothing they could do.
  My whole world fell before my eyes.
  I went home and told my wife, she burst into tears and said she didn't want this to happen.
  I never understood what she meant at the time, but I do now.
  After it was announced I contacted this girl and told her I was coming to get her.
  My parents by this time had been divorced for at least 10 years, so I moved in with my Dad and had her with me.
  I spoke to her mother and talked about the things mentioned at my Judicial, and she said it was suggested by my wife to do those things, but was never done.
  So, that was how I got out, but I wasn't free.
  I was still trapped with their teachings, their ways.
  Although I had my Dad and this chick with me, that was it, the rest of my family were gone, all my friends were gone.
  As she was young she couldn't relate to what I was going thru. I felt so alone and lost.
  I ended up going to counsellors & psychologists to get my head straight, I was on anti depressants to slow my mind down.
  For a year I was a walking zombie, drinking as much as I could to stop my head from accusing and toturing me.
  There were so many times I wanted to die, I hated myself, despised what I had done and become. A few times I tried to do the deed, but lost the courage.
  The only one thing in my life that was still functional was my job. I poured was remnants of my life and mind into it because to me that was the only thing I was good at.
  It worked for 18 months and then I lost the plot.
  Well, that's the first and worst part of my life exiting the Borg.
  That was back in 1995, I have only been truly freed over the last 6 months or so.
  I will write about that soon.
  Thanks for letting me get it out.
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  30

  would you take blood?

  by master chief in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  im confused would i take blood if i was about to die and had no other alternative treatment well to me thats allways been a hard one one to answer and people have allways hated witnesses for refusing it or not giving blood to there own kids.you see my mothers due in to hospital on tuesday and having a major operation the problem for her is she is inactive as a jw and has no blood card which is upto date what do you think she should do 1.phone elders 2.trust in jehovah and refuse blood.3if it comes to the worst take blood and live.

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  Kep

  If my life was on the line, I would take it.
  I've got so much discovering to do...
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  36

  Tatto`s

  by Beans in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  how many of you have gotten them since leaving or piercings?

  i got my ear pierced right after i left and when i was living at home my dad said i couldn`t have it on in the house.i got a tatto about six years ago the look on my dads face was priceless at the beach but he never said anything.. beans.

  if you don`t have anything good to say,say it often!

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  Kep

  I've got 2, plus 1 I'm working on.
  This is the last one I had done.
  
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  20

  Another Newbie

  by Kep in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hi there,.

  my name is kep, and i've been looking on and off for a while and hadn't had the courage to say hello.. however, i feel i should should introduce myself as i've posted comments over the past 2 days.. i have enjoyed this site and have been able to see that there are many good ex-jws, just like me.. i have been "out" for almost 7 years now, and in the last 6 months have finally been able to let go of the borg.. free at last....

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  Kep

  Thank you all for your encouraging words of welcome.
  Man, I wish I had this when I got the "D" in '95.
  In the last 6 months something drastic happened in my life.
  My father (non-JW) was diagnosed with cancer and given 6 months to live.
  I met a former Dub that I knew, he gave me his copy of "Crisis", and my eyes were opened.
  The information in that book I could relate to, and understand, and to read the behind the scenes, made me so angry.
  What I had been taught and still clung to despite not being part of the borg, all flew out the window.
  I must post my story, not that it's got anything new.
  I see that a lot of us have been thru the same thing.
  Thanks again.
  Kepa