because it is such a fragile situation, a dance where the two people don't trust each other enough to just speak freely like they are afraid of being turned into the KGB. And really for good reason.
DesirousOfChange said this should set off alarm bells to anyone. And I think all of us here on this site know what 'distrust and suspicion' feels like at a KH. A feeling that something is just not right with this "brotherhood".
At Woodstock in 1969 a reporter was questioning Michael Lang and Artie Kornfeld, wondering why they seem so happy. Kornfeld said, in part:
"...to really realize what’s really important…The fact that if we can’t all live together and be happy, if you have to be afraid to walk out in the street, if you have to be afraid to smile at somebody, right, well, what kind of a way is that to go through this life?”
I can't put it better than that.