Dear Eden - It must be horrible to go through that. My son-in-law just went thru it and it left him scarred. My wife keeps hounding me to go get my shot, so after your reminder, I think I will. Thanks. Hope you're doing better now. But then to be IGNORED in your hour of need is unexplainable. I think we picked the wrong religion, man. But at least you had SOMEONE who showed concern. Many of us don't.
In the movie St. Vincent (2014) - after bill murray lost his wife, his friend came over and said, "sorry for your loss". bill murray replied, "I never understood why people said that?" His friend said, "they don't know what else to say". Bill said, "how'bout - what was she like... do you miss her... or what are you gonna do now?" ...the friend had no reply, but after a long pause, Bill told his friend: "do yourself a favor - Get a Life, and stop living mine." Good advice for all exJubs i think. We can't expect anything from them and we already know that.
I too feel isolated most of the time from my JW family - like I'm not really even welcome . And I spent the best decades of my life doing hard manual labor to provide for them, raise them, listen to them, read to them, play with them, nurse them back to health when sick, put up with their sassy attitudes as teenagers, & on and on....
I remember when my wife and I lost our full-term son a week before due-date (a knot in the cord), I felt I should tell someone. So I called one of our elders from the hospital to inform him (and the cong). The first thing out of his mouth was: "He probably won't be resurrected" (and then went on to explain the WT understanding on that). I coudn't BELIEVE it. I trusted that brother with my heart in my hour of need - and he let me down. I told another elder about it sometime later and he just dismissively said: He probably didn't know what else to say ( like the old "they're only imperfect men" excuse). So - there you go. Make of it what you will. But we both know the WT is NOT making followers of JC. Too many accumulated experiences like yours and mine to just pass it off.
Normal humans show compassion. Jesus did. I told the CO when I left the cong that I'd been here since 1973 and had RARELY felt Jehovahs' spirit. He snapped back: "THAT'S A SERIOUS ACCUSATION" in a very threatening manner. I just looked straight at him calmly and shook my head yes w/out saying a word. He looked sheepish. He KNEW i was right.
Take care of yourself, Eden. We suffer together.
