Last week, I told you I was going to tell my daughter that I was leaving the truth this weekend and you all gave me sound advice. But, I cannot keep a secret this heavy from the person I love most on this earth, my only daughter, who is beautiful inside and out.
Well, I have always had an open and honest relationship with my daughter, and I guess it paid off. This weekend I visited my daughter (who lives in another state) and I told her I was leaving "the truth." I knew she would ask why and she did. I let my true emotions all out and tearfully and emotionally, showed her a binder I had prepared.
In the binder on the first page was a photo of CTRussel's headstone, with the Laodecian Messenger on it. The next page was the pyramid monument, the one with Watchtower B&T S on it. The next page was another view of it. The next page was the old Watchtower from 1906 with the cross and crown and the knights on it. She is a college educated history major and particularly loves world and ancient history. She knew right away something was wrong. The next page was a print out of the Masonic symbols, taken from the freemason's own website, showing the cross and crown. She was visably upset. She had tears in her eyes. The next photo was of the Finished Mystery book with the winged disk on it. She seemed incredibly uncomfortable, the significance was apparent to her immediately. I asked, "How could Jehovah allow these symbols to be used by his earthy visible organization?"
I then turned back to the headstone and said "Isn't it strange, Jehovah waited until the perfect man, Jesus, was 30 years old to annoint him, but Charles Taze Russell was only in his mid twenties when he started this religion. Does that make any sense?" Then I turned the next page to some Watchtower publication quotes about Jehovah living on a star, the Pyramid of Giza being Jehovah's stone witness, how he used the distances inside the pyramid to arrive at the date 1874. I showed her the quote in the Finished Mystery book about how Russell was still directing the organization after his death.
Then we went over the quotes about 1874, 1914, 1925 and 1975. She has heard us talk about 1975 all her life. I had actual Kingdom Ministry articles and Watchtower articles.
Next in the binder was the whole Sodom and Gomorrah thing...asked her if this was really "new light, "or was this total reversal.
Then I went over the Watchtower view of homosexual acts not being grounds for scriptural divorce and I asked her about how she felt about the poor innocent spouses who had to deal with this. Then, of course, we discussed oral sex, which thier District Overseer is obsessed with. I told her how people had gotten divorced, which led to disfellowshipping, kids losing their secure homes, etc, and how was that right. We talked about the blood fractions/blood issue. Asked her if she had a child that could have been saved but had died, then later she learned that the Society was now allowing blood fractions to be used, how would she feel. I asked her if this was God changing his mind or was this men, making decisions for us on their own. I kept asking - is all this new light or total reversal?
At times, she seemed so uncomfortable that it looked like she wanted to take the binder and throw it away. I showed her the magazine cover that showed all the old people on it that read "1914 The Generation that Will Not Pass Away." I had written on the page Q: Where are they now? A: Passed Away.
Beth Sarim was discussed, along with the photos and a copy of the actual JW Messenger newspaper handed out at the 1931 District Convention, showing the house which was built for the ancient worthies, discussing the names on the deed. She shook her head in disbelief. I showed her the quote from the Kingdom Proclaimers book regarding this, which she has.
I finished up with Watchtower quotes about how no one should have to choose between their religion and their family. (her grandma and grampa were both df'd for smoking in 1974 and she never got to see them because we were taught that if we did, we were just as guilty as they were.) I also had quotes about how the Society said they were Jehovah's mouth piece and his prophet and also what Jehovah thought about false prophets. I ended with saying that the Watchtower Society had convinced me that they were not God's earthly visible organization. I at no time said the word "cult" or "apostate." I only used Watchtower publications, nothing else other than the Mason symbols from their website.
I reminded her that I could get df'd for believing this, and that I was terrified that I was going to lose her. I asked her what she wanted me to do. I told her that I hadn't been in Field Service for 2 months and hadn't been to the KH in a whole month. I could not ever step foot inside the Hall again.
She said, "Mother, I could never shun you. I would never ask you to be in a religion you didn't believe in. You don't have to come to the Kingdom Hall with me tomorrow." She was crying and wiping the tears from her eyes.
I told her that I wouldn't bring this subject up again, but she could bring it up anytime she wanted. We went shopping and had a great time all afternoon, not mentioning it. She seemed even more loving and close to me than ever. Later that night, when we returned home, she sat on the couch next to me and said, "Mom, I have a hundred different things going on in my mind right now, but I want you to know that there is nothing you could ever possibly do that would make me not want you in my life." I told her I loved her and felt the same way about her. She said she was not ready to talk about it, but would write me a letter.
The next day, I stayed home with her baby son and she and her husband went to the meeting. She convinced her husband that it would be a good thing, since they could both consentrate on the meeting for the first time since the baby was born.
After the meeting, I asked if they enjoyed the meeting. My son in law said "Not really." He told me how my daughter was tearing up and blowing her nose all during the meeting, telling him she must be having some sort of allergic reaction.
Anyway, I left Sunday afternoon and I asked her if she wanted me to leave the binder for her to look at and review and she said "Yes."
I hope she doesn't change her mind about shunning me. I hope she does some research on her own. I will keep you all posted.
