Yeah, it's hard to date at first when you are newly "out". But what worked for me was to not try to think about JW stuff AT ALL! ZERO. NADA.
Don't think like a JW, try to think like a normal person. Try to stop worrying about what other JWs are doing for example. Stop looking at their Facebook stuff. Stop thinking about all their crap. Once I stopped caring about them and worrying what "they might think" I started doing better with the friends situation as well as the girls situation.
Try to develop friends too, not just chasing romance. These friends can show you how to "act" around people of the opposite sex in a non-JW way, which is what you need to do to get anywhere.
By the way, with these friends, come clean and tell them you feel like an awkward dork and tell them why. Most of these people will take pity on your JW past knowing it wasn't your fault you were in there in the first place. Most will want to try to help you get a date, get laid, whatever you need. Unlike JWs, most non-JWs won't judge you for who you are.
Some will even like you for it.
LivingTheDream
JoinedPosts by LivingTheDream
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23
why am i still single?
by redpilllizard81 ini have the hardest time meeting singles in the "world".
currently inactive.
but my dating situation is sort of in limbo and its driving me mad..
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LivingTheDream
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What Rumors Were Said About You Either While You Were In Or Were Out Of The Organization?
by minimus inwhen i slowly but surely departed, i heard that the love of money was what drew me out.
(yeah, right)..
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LivingTheDream
The rumors were that I was going through a mid life crisis, partying too much, staying out late and chasing young tail, spending money like no tomorrow and driving a new muscle car around town too fast.
Oh wait, that stuff was true...
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Goodbye JWD/JWN (my last post)
by slimboyfat inafter some considerable thought i have decided that i will no longer post on this forum because i want to return to jehovah.
thank you for all the kindness and many interesting discussions over the years.
i wish you all well in the future and the decisions you make.
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LivingTheDream
In my youth I had a "best friend" JW who was getting married and asked me to be his best man which I gladly accepted. A month before the wedding, his fiance leaves him and moves in with two guys, BOTH of which she was having a sexual relationship with. She was DF'd for this and for about 1 year straight all I heard from my friend was that he was better off without that "whore", that "liar", that "unfaithful slut". I didn't hear from him for a few months after that first tragic year that I spent with his head on my shoulder. I comforted him the best I could and then he went his way.
Then, out of the blue, he calls to tell me that she "returned to him" and that they are now dating again and will be married soon. At a loss for words, all I could say was "be careful".
He proceeded to excoriate me for being "judgmental" and "unforgiving". I tried to explain my words, but he hung up on me. I only said "be careful" by the way. That was all. Two simple words. This, after he called her names for 1 straight year every time I saw him. This after fielding his complaints and giving him the "it will be OK" speech over and over again.
Anyway, he got married and didn't even invite me to the wedding. That was my punishment for trying to be a real friend to him and for worrying about him.
I guess when presented with his news, I should have simply said "congratulations!" Of course I really wouldn't mean it, but as it turns out, that would be the only thing he could handle emotionally. Now that I'm older and wiser and presented with something similar, that's what I do.
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Congratulations SlimBoyFat! -
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LivingTheDream
This darn thing is stuck in my head now!
Curse you oppostate.
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In general, the people on this forum have a poor outlook spiritually speaking.
by Stand for Pure Worship inso i waz reading the august 15 wt study article, elisha saw fiery chariots, do you?
and it made me think about this forum.
if you remember, syria was hunting god's prophet, elisha.
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LivingTheDream
Stand For Pure Worship,
I challenge you to put your words to the test and do what I did. Pioneer. Apply for and get accepted to go to "Gods House", go to Bethel. Be used to further kingdom interests right there at the hub of the Organization you so revere.
Put your money where your mouth is and do it. Don't "imaginate" it, don't just talk big talk, do it.
I did it. I felt the same way then as you do now, that is, when I was young, naive and gullable.
When you come back a broken man, then look me up on Facebook and we'll talk. Let's see if you feel the same way then as you do now.
Brock Talon
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D'oh. Just outed myself to a mate unintentionally.. Elephant - meet room.
by Captain Blithering inpicked up by a friend (not an appointed man) in his car, linked my phone to his bluetooth stereo for music, the big screen immediately showed what i'd been listening to previously.
a podcast from healing x outreach on jw's new light.
awkward much?
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LivingTheDream
A few years after I faded, a JW "friend" me came over to my house to see how I was after I had a serious accident and he heard about it through the grapevine. He hadn't visited me in my "new" home even though I'd been there two years, so you can judge how good a friend he was. Still, he at least tried to visit me which was more than I could say for the many other "friends" I had made at the Kingdom Hall who never even visited me once.
Anyway, my live-in girlfriend opened the door on his surprise visit and let him in, not realizing that I might have not wanted him to come in. Oh well. There I was, convalescing on the couch in front of the huge Christmas tree she and her mother had just put up in my living room. My girlfriend offered him Thanksgiving Turkey we had eaten the day before during our huge feast at my house, which still had all the settings and trimmings left over for him to see and partake from.
He ate the turkey dinner, looked at the tree while asking me how I was and spied my girlfriend return from our bedroom having changed into modest sleepwear.
He left looking puzzled. I've never seen nor heard from this "good friend" since, in any way, good or bad.
That's OK, I've made tons of better friends than him in the mean time that accept me just the way I am and who like to celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving with me.
I don't really miss him.
Brock Talon
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I will give my husband the divorce he wants
by losingit innot because i agree with him.
because i do not want the divorce.
but because i love him and i want to respect him.
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LivingTheDream
losingit,
The Bible says a man should love his wife like Christ loved the Church. Christ lived and died for the Church. So, a real man should not only be willing to die for his wife, he should live for his wife as well.
Any man that abuses his wife verbally, emotionally or physically is not deserving of anything but a rightfully earned contempt from his wife, and the rest of society for that matter.
Your husband has that from me.Brock Talon
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New book "Journey to God's House" 3 free signed copies giveaway
by LivingTheDream inhey folks, .
goodreads is having free giveaway of 3 signed copies of my new book: "journey to god's house".
nothing required, just sign up for it!
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LivingTheDream
There is one more day remaining for this free book giveaway. It costs you nothing to sign up for it...
Brock Talon
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How Many Enjoy Celebrating Holidays? Birthdays?
by minimus ini admit that i do enjoy it, especially with my grandkids.
birthdays, too.. i believe we missed out on a lot of fun and normal activities because we were witnesses..
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LivingTheDream
My wife has taught me to live life to the max including holidays: XMAS (including attending pagents at the church) Thanksgivings with all the family, July 4th BBQs with all my friends, Birthdays for everybody all the time, and so on.
I'm a holiday celebrating monster, living a second childhood with no regrets, feeling zero guilt.
It's my damn parents who stole that from me, who no longer even attend meetings themselves now... they're the ones that should feel the guilt.
I'm still waiting for the apology...
Brock
