Eventually, you just have to come to terms with the fact that you'll never have a "normal relationship" if you have one at all. I still choose to talk to her, but I only get as close as I feel comfortable with. I don't need the negativity in my life.......it would only bring me down. I respect the fact that she is my parent and really tried to do what she thought was in my best interests, I just don't see things from her point of view. I used to be so angry about things that happened, but I felt so much better to let it all go. Now I truly feel sorry for her and the fact that she must be so miserable trying to live up to someone else's expectations and sacrificed the relationship with her children to do so.
Roo,
This is a very powerful statement, and also reflects how I feel. Many on the thread have commented that although they were good kids and pioneered on summers etc, it wasn't enough to get any approval. You're never 'finished'--always working harder on doing more to please parents that seem to have no capacity for positive reinforcement or validation.
That relationship exactly mirrors what the WBTS teaches their followers. There is never a stopping point, you are pushed beyond exhaustion and there is never any positive feedback. They always quote the scripture, "Well done good and faithful slave, you were doing what you ought to have done."
My own mother used to say this all the time and it left me with an empty feeling kind of like, why can't you just say "Well done" and leave it at that?
So they are merely parroting what they themselves are subjected to.
Great thread.
Lisa