since i left.... so there i was, a disabled single dad bereft of all he had known or believed for 30 years.. i had moved a good 45 minutes away from the area where the events in my introductory post went down, but was now living in an area where i had resided some ten years earlier and still had a few stale connections with the organization.. i was lonely, depressed, pissed off, and really disgusted with the god i had been shown in my years of unfruitful association.. in my mind, he had made me the way i am, which apparently entailed being unable to meet his 'righteous requirements', and was going to kill me for it.
he had endowed all of us with a natural human nature (apart from our fallen sinful nature,) and now expected us to conquer our every natural impulse or desire, even the healthy ones, to survive the big a.. hold off on marriage or kids, no college, no success, no normalcy... the big a'll get ya if ya don't watch out!.
so i railed against him, defied him to just take me, do anything to show he even existed or had any power at all.. i went around saying 'god is an a$$h*le' and the like, but then i realized something that shook my world..... i was just as much a witness outside the organization as i had been inside!.
I have to say I find it hard to believe that anyone would treat you as you had somekind of mental challenge. The JW's in your old KH were stupid. You are very articulate when you write. I like the way you express yourself, thanks for sharing. Looking forward to more of your story.
Leslie
1.your physical attractiveness.. 2.your intelligence.. 3.your personality.. with 5 being average.. i don't think many will answer these tough questions.
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Hortensia I love your profile. I give you 10 for personality, as I give 10 for most here. I have to say Bubble had the best reply. Shouldn't we all be 666
Physical attractiveness - 8
Intellect - 9
personality - 7
Leslie
the following quote appears in a may 1 watchtower study article.
does anyone have any information on the greek educational system?
when did education begin?
You know what they say about those that assume. The WT is a donkey's behind.
Leslie
at circuit and especially district assemblies so many witnesses take.
notes of what was being said at such a feverish pace that i would ask.
myself: "what are they hearing that i am not hearing that is so important.
I was exactly like found-my-way. I took notes so that I would pay attention, and was very sincere that I had the truth and was doing all in my power to follow.
Now looking back I can see how I began the great disconnect. I stopped taking notes at the assemblies and started looking around. Was kind of amazed how everyone looked to me. Like glazed eyes, parents struggling to keep their kids quiet, important ones always standing around etc. Took a few years, but finally said this is all BS.
Leslie
hey i just joined here i have finally got up the courage to start doing research for myself since i've left the "truth" just wanted to introduce myself and say hi.
my name is anna and i got out of the org.
almost a year ago.
Welcome Anna, hope you stay with us for awhile.
Leslie
i have lurked here for quite some time but felt the need to register, probably because i feel almost ready to leave.
a little background.
i am raised in the truth, am for all intents and purposes a good witness.
Welcome and thanks for sharing. The good news is that you have an education, and will be able to support yourself. Thank the Lord for that. Keep coming back, and vent away it is healthy.
Leslie
i was raised among the witnesses and left in my early 30's due to a mixture of doctrinal disputes and social isolation.
my mother and both of my sisters remain within the organization.
i also have two brothers, one df'd, one who never quite caught the watchtower bug.. my road within the organization was a rocky one that eventually lead to a place where i found myself socially isolated within the congregation as a person simply unfit for fellowship with proper, upright, theocratic people who must cut off all 'worldy' association, suffer the ensueing isolation, and eat humble pie until such a time as they determined i was 'spiritual minded' enough for them to associate with.. baptism was held up as my expected goal, but despite trying, i was never quite good enough for them.
First welcome Roller, glad you are here with us. Thanks for sharing your story. Thank goodness you never were baptized. It certainly was a blessing that the elders were so stupid, that they never knew you.
Leslie
my brother called me yesterday from california and told me his dear wife had finally passed away at 9:40 pst.
she fought long and hard and didnt go easily into the night.
if god wanted her home she wasnt going to go without a fight!
Sorry to hear of you loss.
Leslie
it's been a while since this topic has been brought up.
use it as a chance to see if there is someone you might know from years past.
1973-1976 --- lakeside, ca??
Jourles I was in Ramona in 1980-82. Sorry about the multiple posts my enter bottom was stuck, geee how silly. I was in Jamestown in the 90's.
Leslie
got up early and getting ready for work.
couldn't breathe and lots of chest pain.
had jake take me to er.
Wow thank goodness you are still here with us!!!! All I have to say is you must be one tough guy to be home already. How is your poor wife doing? She must have been scared out of her mind as well. Take care of yourself, get some rest, and STOP SMOKING!!!
Leslie
