Posts by sweetrose74

19

New to this forum and few thoughts.

by sweetrose74 in

well i have not been a part of the jws for over 12 years.

i was born and raised one.

indoctrincated from birth you can say.

sweetrose74

Fade away - yes it does feel good to leave. I have both family in and out thankfully. All my siblings are out so thats good for the next generation. I have 11 nieces and nephews who I encourage in every way to be independant thinkers and to question anything someone tells you you have to believe. Glad you have your wife for support it really helps.

19

New to this forum and few thoughts.

by sweetrose74 in

well i have not been a part of the jws for over 12 years.

i was born and raised one.

indoctrincated from birth you can say.

sweetrose74

Cadellin thanks. Yes I do have strong principles I am trying to raise my son by. Its when I had him that I even more so became determined to carve out a life free of the BS I had been led to believe as a child. When you leave people think you become a heathen with no morals or principles. I think this is a bad misconception escpecially from family who is supposed to know you. I know right from wrong and I think thats finally what made me see the light. How can you expect me to believe something when you won't even let me test it against really investigating other religions?

Thanks Pika_Chu i was led here by a kindred spirit who insisted I needed to see how many of us there were. I finally gave into the "peer pressure" lol. Glad I did it feels good to vent some of this stuff.

28

Lost Legitimate Opportunities For Love

by PublishingCult in

when you were in the organization of jehovah's witnesses, did you shun legitimate courtship attempts from "worldly" men or women who were otherwise very desirable and suitable because they were non-believers?

.

did you fancy them as well, but tried to get them to study and come into the organization in order to justify the relationship?.

sweetrose74

Yes I did shun attempts from so called "worldly" boys. Sad thing was I was even encouraged to shun attempts from JW boys who were so called "bad association." Also had JW good boys who were interested in me told by their parents because I wasn't from a good JW family (you know both parents active witnesses) they shouldn't date me. The whole dating thing as a witness is a joke anyways. You are not really able to get to know a potential mate before marriage if you adhere to the strict dating protocol. How do you really get to know someone when your always chaperaoned? And I'm not even talking about sex I'm just talking about you really can only get to know someone's true feelings if your not allowed to be one on one. I also agree if your over like 22 in the organization and not married good luck finding a "suitable" mate.

Guess you can say this is a sore subject for me.

So lost opportunities yeah. I can think of one I have much regret over thankfully we've salvaged a very good friendship out of it though.

19

New to this forum and few thoughts.

by sweetrose74 in

well i have not been a part of the jws for over 12 years.

i was born and raised one.

indoctrincated from birth you can say.

sweetrose74

Well I have not been a part of the Jws for over 12 years. I was born and raised one. Indoctrincated from birth you can say. Thank goodness I somehow gained the strength and fortitude to exticate myself from their narrow-minded views and life. I have my dad to thank for this. I can't give you an exact date that I started doubting but it began around the age of 15-16 when my parents got divorced. I say how the religion tore apart two people who dearly loved each other and the havoc it reigned down on a family with 4 children. I wish I could say I took my stand at this point but unfortunately it took many more years and a failed JW marriage myself to start myself on the road to freedom.

I have so much more I could say about all of this but it would take up too much space.

I am very grateful for my choice to chose freedom and am a million times happier in the life I have chosen to live. To be free of shame, guilt and judgement is a wonderful thing. I wake up every morning knowing I can make the choices I feel are right for me in my heart and go to sleep each night with a smile on my face. I won't say there haven't been adjustment issues, cause believe me socially children raised by die-hard JWs are stunted and awkward but everyday I work to overcome these. I have family that is still a part of the "organization" that I so want to be close to but know that it really is futile to let myself get to close because all it will mean is pain and rejection. My 87 year-old grandmother, who I used to be her favorite, and I got reaquainted after many years of almost nonexistant communication, being the main one. I had an opportunity to move in with her so she could continue to live in her home of over 50 years but had to turn this down due to knowing if I did I would have to deprive my 10 year old son of holidays. I knew if I lived in her house I would have to respect her feelings. I could not as a responsible parent allow this to happen to my son, I vowed he would never miss out on the things I did as a child or be forced into a narrow minded mold. I hate that my grandmother can't live the rest of her life in her own home. You would think one of the 3 of her JW children would make sure she could do this or one of the elders or friends in the congregation she has gone to for 50+ years could assist her in this matter. Where's the so called brotherly love? What about taking care of your fellow brothers and sisters?

Anyways like I said I do have issues that leaving caused but they never outweigh the relief my choice has given me. I'm glad my longtime friend Jeckle encouraged me to get on here and read some of the posts and join. My hat is off to all who have the courage to tear themselves away from the BS and mind control. I also sympathisize with the issues it creates. We all end up losing loved ones and friends when we walk or run away. The ones I am most sad for are those who have their doubts and never walk away or who do leave but never let go of the life or the beliefs. Thanks for listening. I may not post much but I will jump in when time allows me.

12

i outed myself on facebook

by jeckle in

i've been post things on facebook like washtowel, field circus,etc.

next i told a nonwitness friend i was glad to be out of the cult he invited me to his church.

actually i said cults suck i'm glad i'm not in one anymore.

sweetrose74

"new me when i believed and was patient but since i got enough balls to research and found out it's been a short time comparitively"

I know its a new you. I can tell and yes it has been a relatively short time for you to come full circle with your doubts and your choice to get off the fence. Glad you have. thanks for the welcome.

What a relief to know you weren't outting yourself in the other way. I would have been sad considering we've known each other so long and I hadn't figured it out already and a little weirded out maybe too.

Thanks for the welcome from Broken Promises.

12

i outed myself on facebook

by jeckle in

i've been post things on facebook like washtowel, field circus,etc.

next i told a nonwitness friend i was glad to be out of the cult he invited me to his church.

actually i said cults suck i'm glad i'm not in one anymore.

sweetrose74

They aren't trying to show love. Just trying to maintain their hold on you. If you leave it looks bad on them. All about the mind control and appearance thing that all "good standing" JWs use to keep their faithful flock in line. They even get their not "weak" but loyal followers to assist them in this like your studying but never baptized step cousin.