Posts by Marilyn

15

Help!! How can you make a witness tell the truth?

by Bridgette in

jw
friends

i'm talking the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about their organization---up front, not subtly creeping it in.

two of them caught me by surprise this morning at my door (nobody here knows me from adam) offering the awake magazine on battered women.

i was incredulous, having had experience with being a battered woman and a witness all at the same time.

Marilyn

I have had some visits recently and I know the kind of frustration you are dealing with. I got much further with them than you - watching them be sooooooooooooooo sweet, when all the while I know what they are really like. It's galling!!! You are caught between a rock and a hard place. If you show them that they lie, they don't deal with the lie, they deal with how you know about their lies. They are then absolved from any further dealings with you because you are "apostate" and not to be trusted. Only an apostate raises the subject of their lies and they know they have the truth, so apostates are evil for trying to make the truth look false. You can't win.

Marilyn

12

Why is it stressful to be a Witness?

by Mindchild in

jw
friends

i would honestly appreciate any feedback of why, in simple terms, you feel there are stresses to being a witness.

the source of stress you have in mind doesn't have to be gigantic.

i'm looking to catalog a list of all the things causing stress to witnesses.. here is a list of ten things i could think of, and there are probably many more.

Marilyn

Scorpion, but I forgot the most obvious one. The fart problem!!!! Boy did I let out a big one when I got home from 10 yrs at the hall!!!!

Marilyn
ps interesting that we picked the same things eh?? Clearly we suffered from the same WT inadequacies!!!

11

Aussie Ex-Dubs - Will You Be Voting Today?

by Stephanus in

jw
friends

i realise some still retain a bit of a superstitious fear in certain areas where watchtower dogma has been drummed into you such as birthdays and christmas.

how do you feel about voting today?

especially in light of the fact that here in oz voting is compulsory and that doing so would demonstrate "subjection to the superior authorities" (rom.

Marilyn

I went to the tolling booth and got my name marked off. Then I submitted the papers in the same virginal state that they were handed me in. Please Explain??? (in house joke there) When I was first "out" I enjoyed politics. Now it bores me rigid. All the lies and point scoring. The best part about this election is I've been out of the country for 3 weeks - got back on Thursday. What a joy to miss out all the tv advertising and obvious ABC bias!!! Actually I think being able to send in the "we vote for God's Kingdom bla bla" on the why didn't you vote form is the only thing I miss about the Witnesses. Sometimes being crazy has its advantages.

You?

49

DA'd myself today

by Pierced Angel in

jw
friends

well, i did it.. it's official and i'm relieved.. the elders wanted to try talking to me once again, but after awhile it was obvious that they were only interested in changing my thoughts not answering any questions.

so, i just calmly asked if i could disassociate myself.

they acted stunned and they got tears in their eyes, but i told them that i had already grieved and was ready to move on with life.

Marilyn

:::::::::::::::I just hate being in this living "limbo"...but don't just have myself to consider, with all my relatives being JW's. My mom is 81...my husband's parents are 90 and 87

Dear HadEnuf, I can imagine what it must be like for you. When you see thru it there is no turning back. I heard it described as "you can't unring a bell". I wasn't particularly noble about leaving, because I honestly didn't know I'd be disfellowshipped for it. This was back in 1979 and disfellowshipping wasn't in vogue then. As far as I understood it, I could leave without punishment. My husband didn't have any family in it, but all of my family are JWs, all my relatives etc. I've paid the ultimate price for my naivity. If I had my time over again, I would not have been so honest. I'm not very judgemental about what others choose to do when they realise the truth about the *truth*. It's just such an individual thing. I suggest you take very good care of yourself, because I believe what you are coping with is much more stressful than dealing with the back-wash of leaving. Be especially kind to yourself on a regular basis.

kind regards
Marilyn

12

Why is it stressful to be a Witness?

by Mindchild in

jw
friends

i would honestly appreciate any feedback of why, in simple terms, you feel there are stresses to being a witness.

the source of stress you have in mind doesn't have to be gigantic.

i'm looking to catalog a list of all the things causing stress to witnesses.. here is a list of ten things i could think of, and there are probably many more.

Marilyn

The treatmill of trying to live up to their expectations of you.

Living with in a community where everyone knows your business. Or peer group pressure.

The endless juggling of time to fit in meetings, study, service, work, home maintanance, and recreation.

The tedium of meetings. Or coping with the same old, same old.

Constant disappointment at the un christian behavior of other witnesses.

16

JWs in China?

by crochunter in

jw
friends

does anyone have any info about jw in china?

i've never heard about this topic?

since everyone is supposed to be witnessed to, china is obviously important.. thanks.. croc.

Marilyn

My husband once did the Math on this problem. You have to divide 1.2billion Chinese by 5 million JWs. Then work out how many Chinese there are to every publisher in the world. Then you can gestimate what fraction of these are actually preaching in China and it works out something like 1 witness to 5 million Chinese. It would take each witness in China 300 years to get around their alloted territory (assuming they are all pioneering of course!!!!). MY figures are made up - but the real figures are equally ridiculous.

China is not the only relatively untouched territory. The figures for countries like India, Indonesia, North Korea, Pakistan do not allow for Math 24.14 to be fulfilled.

Marilyn

1

Richie exposes motive for shunning

by Marilyn in

jw
friends

::::::::::::::::i heard this incident about this elder in europe, i felt a degree of fear and jealousy inside of me.

why did i feel that way?

because indirectly i wished that i had the strength and courage to do the same thing by resigning and walk away from the "truth" and become free from the shackles of religious bondage.

Marilyn

::::::::::::::::I heard this incident about this elder in Europe, I felt a degree of fear and jealousy inside of me. Why did I feel that way? Because indirectly I wished that I had the strength and courage to do the same thing by resigning and walk away from the "truth" and become free from the shackles of religious bondage. But no, at the time I was still serving as an elder but deeply unhappy about my "priviledge" in the congregation. I wanted out at the time and yet had no courage.

Richie, I believe that there are many who feel like this. I think quite a number of disfellowshippings are more about resentment and punishment for your ability to make a stand for freedom. I identified this problem 20 yrs ago when we were disfellowshipped. My brother instigated our judicial committee hearing - when all we'd done was walk away. I am certain that he was deeply disturbed by our ability to extricate ourselves from our heavily involved JW lives. I've read a lot of cases of disfellowshippings on the net, and so many of them don't fit the Biblical criteria. However I think envy is a powerful motivator with the need to punish those who leave. Disfellowshipping with it's spiteful companion shunning works to even up the score a bit. If they have to stay in and be miserable, they can at least take some of the shine off your freedom!!!!!

Marilyn

49

DA'd myself today

by Pierced Angel in

jw
friends

well, i did it.. it's official and i'm relieved.. the elders wanted to try talking to me once again, but after awhile it was obvious that they were only interested in changing my thoughts not answering any questions.

so, i just calmly asked if i could disassociate myself.

they acted stunned and they got tears in their eyes, but i told them that i had already grieved and was ready to move on with life.

Marilyn

HadEnuf, I just wanted to tell you that we took about 3 yrs before we had the courage to leave. Even then it might not have happened had it not been for the birth of our second child, who cried day and nite and placed a tremendous strain on us - carrying on the WT charade became despensible. We also knew that we were responsible for 2 small children and we couldn't inflict the WT life on them when we no longer believed it. It's funny what you will put up with for yourself, but when there are children involved you are forced to re think. (this is the reason that so many have to stay in - and I completely understand why they do). My encouragment to you is to take your time. I am a great believer in waiting until the time and opportunity presents itself to make a difficult decision - rather than forcing the issue before it feels comfortable for you.

I wish you well....

Marilyn

49

DA'd myself today

by Pierced Angel in

jw
friends

well, i did it.. it's official and i'm relieved.. the elders wanted to try talking to me once again, but after awhile it was obvious that they were only interested in changing my thoughts not answering any questions.

so, i just calmly asked if i could disassociate myself.

they acted stunned and they got tears in their eyes, but i told them that i had already grieved and was ready to move on with life.

Marilyn

bboyneko comments remind me of what the CO said to me when we told them we were leaving. "Your husband will have no rules in place to keep him faithful to you now". What an insult to me I thought!!!! What a twisted view of life they have. Anyway, 20 yrs later and still very happily married - some how we've struggled on without all their rules and regulations and some how we've managed to be very happy, and successful by simply using a commonsense approach to life. Remember: The best form of revenge is to live well!!!!

Marilyn

22

Zero Tolerance Versus Namby Pambying.

by Englishman in

jw
friends

i don't humour jehovah's witnesses anymore.

i don't care if they label me 'apostate' or whatever, it's just great to be completely open and honest whenever i come across one.. "what do you think of this business with the wtbts being part of the un, eh?

" causes some consternation.. "that whole generation thing being tied into 1914 turned into a real farce, didn't it?

Marilyn

Englishman - I think it's horses for course. Depends what your situation is. I've tried all methods - nothing works. I'm still on the outer, disfed and dispised after walking away 20 yrs ago. I was real well behaved for about 14 yrs, (mamby pamby says it all) then I had an outburst of huge proportions, somewhat enhanced by the hormone treatment I was on at the time. Apparently I mad all manner of crazy threats and it resulted in them backing off and accepting my presence in my JW parent's lives. So yeah I'm all for telling them some home truths when your sick to your stomach of taking their crap.

Marilyn