OverlappingGeneralizations

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Posts by OverlappingGeneralizations

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  27

  Why didn't Jehovah know the flood wouldn't work?

  by OverlappingGeneralizations in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this has been something that is bugging me lately-.

  jehovah is all knowing.

  he knows that to do away with evil, he has to do away with satan.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  This has been something that is bugging me lately-

  Jehovah is all knowing. He knows that to do away with evil, he has to do away with satan. So why did he wipe away all the bad people with the flood and leave satan alive? He had to know that wouldn't make much difference in the grand scheme of things.
  

  Additionally, confining satan to the earth in 1914 supposedly marked the a great increase in wars and overall evil. But, if we already posses inherited sin from Adam and Eve, what more evil could satan really do just by being here?

  Just feeling philosophical again...
  
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  28

  Assembly baptisms/attendance - keep 'em coming!

  by freddo in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  don't forget to post your reported assembly and convention attendance and baptisms and whether they are higher or lower than customary (if you know).. here's some detail passed to me of the last circuit assembly held at surrey (uk) assembly hall.. attendance 922 baptisms 3 (half circuit).

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  Ours was about 950 in attendance, and 1 baptism (child, probably 12-ish).
  
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  20

  Crazy bible logic

  by OverlappingGeneralizations in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  i was thinking the other day (i know, i know, bad dub, no thinking allowed!)...

  did you ever notice the screwy logic that we are led to believe is the truth?

  like ezekiel 33:8:.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  I was thinking the other day (I know, I know, bad dub, no thinking allowed!)... Did you ever notice the screwy logic that we are led to believe is the truth? Like Ezekiel 33:8:

  -"When I say to someone wicked, ‘Wicked one, you will surely die!’ but you do not speak out to warn the wicked one to change his course, he will die as a wicked man because of his own error, but I will ask his blood back from you"

  This was always beat into my head that if I didn't preach, all the dead people would be blamed on me. I didn't kill them, God did. Yet he, of infallible justice, blames imperfect ol' me? I get to be God's scapegoat? (Wait a minute, is that a privilege? Usually crappy jobs in the bOrg are considered privileges...)

  Anyhow, so next time I feel like killing somebody, all I have to do is tell a 3rd party- "I am going to kill a random person at a random time with a totally random method". If they don't stop me, it'll be the 3rd party's fault. I'm off the hook. I'm imitating God.

  Lets hear all those crazy bible logic stories!
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  56

  If Jehovah's Witnesses were a cereal, what would they be?

  by Zoos in

  1. social
  2. humour

  cult flakes?.

  .

  (welcome to the height of intellectual thread topics.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  Well, I am trying to watch my weight (gotta fit into those tight-pants!). So, I prefer the diet cereal, "Russel-Lite"! Remember the commercial?
  

  "Yes friends, when that camel-sized ass of yours won't fit through the kitchen door, let alone the eye of a needle, try new Russel-Lite! Now available in Franz'enBerry! What's that Oliver? You want some "Knorr"? Absolutely! Look for Russel-Lite in your favorite grocer's dumpster. Russel-Lites!* "

  *Russel-Lite cereal is not for everyone. Russel-Lite has been know to cause cancer in the state of California. Russel-Lite may cause brain damage, the sudden urge to knock on strangers' doors at 9:01am, and extremely lethargic, aimless sidewalk travel. Russel-Lite may also lead to the purchase of a mini-van, polyester suits, and in some extreme cases, corduroy. If you should arrive at a kingdom hall in a new minivan, with your body covered in corduroy, discontinue your Russel-Lite regimen and seek psychiatric attention as soon as possible.
  
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  26

  Bygone Days of Old Bethel...

  by freemindfade in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  something occurred to me last night.

  people that made their pilgrimage to jw mecca (bethel) would often be excited about some silly things, i say silly because for those of you who were there or lived near enough to be involved in these things regularly they lost their magic.

  i am talking about on tours one of the most memorable things people talked about or looked forward to... lunch.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  I am a rural hillbilly, and even at the height of my J-dubbieness, I never wanted to go to the "big city" for any reason. Now, with all the videos online of what goes on there, I don't need to go.
  
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  23

  City of Sodom discovered

  by Saved_JW in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-3270999/has-biblical-city-sodom-monstrous-site-jordan-matches-descriptions-area-destroyed-god.html

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  The article failed to mention that they also found a clay vessel inscribed with the words "AstroGlide". While astrologists were initially puzzled to its use, the rest of the world knew they had stumbled upon Sodom...
  
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  36

  Super JW Cart

  by M*A*S*H in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  i have a confession to make.

  a strange urge is building in my brain... each time i see a jw literature cart on the street it builds.

  it is becoming a stronger and stronger thought in my mind.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  If I was manning the cart that day, I'd be like "Hmm, so that's 24 magazines, 4 books, and one cart. What an encouraging day, eh brothers?"
  
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  28

  Prayer Question I Had After Sundays Watchtower...

  by freemindfade in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  while i was sitting through another grueling watchtower, dying from my brain being turned into cult pudding, i had this thought after i heard this read: .

  when we express our most intimate thoughts to god in prayer, he may answer us through a bible passage, an article in a magazine, or an encouraging word from a fellow believer.

  -august 2015 watchtard.

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  I like how it said that we could find the answer in "an article in a magazine". Which magazine? New people might not know. How fulfilled they will be when they look for answers in Cosmo!
  
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  48

  Bethel Layoff Notices arrive under Bethellite doors

  by Quarterback in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just heard from a reliable source that some at the canadian branch have received their lay-off notices under their doors at bethel.

  don't know what the letter looks like.

  probably something like, " the tribe has spoken, bring us your torches"

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  Anyone else see the irony of leaving the message in the door, early in the morning, without knocking? Kinda like something a "half-hearted witness" would do while out in the ministry?
  
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  12

  Some things need no translation...

  by wifibandit in

  1. social
  2. humour

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  OverlappingGeneralizations

  Rumor has it, "Sing to Jehovah- Vocal Renditions" is going to sound a little different this year: