To Anitar: It's funny that you told that story, it's similar to mine in many ways. My family was very musical, and all six kids got excellent grades in school. (I'm the oldest.) By high school, I played 30 instruments, started to write a symphony, taught myself the trombone in 5 minutes by transposing keys, and was student conductor of the orchestra. I went to college to study science, math, and education. I only finished 3 years before running out of money. I went into the working world, and 6 years later, at 27 years old, the JW's found me and I studied and got baptized, and married.
I then wanted to finish my degree because my wife worked so hard as a nurse. Her first husband had never worked and she did, so I didn't want her to do that again. She really had a kind heart and I loved her. The "brothers" told me that if I went back to college, they'd never use me. They said they needed my "skills" as a teacher and organizer. I was a book study conductor after only 2 years and there were elders who weren't, yet I was just a MS. I was given so many responsibilities that everyone said I'd be a CO in no time. But I stepped down to care for my wife, have a child, and try to find work.
I did pretty well until 2001, when my wife left me after I researched the Internet (I'm also a Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer and taught computer networking) and discovered the WT's vile behavior concerning child abuse. My daughter was raped when 9 years old by a known pedophile and the elders and the pedophile's wife knew he was visiting our home to work on my house, yet they never warned us. So after 3 years of my anger and threats to "kill every elder at Bethel", they moved out. I've seen my daughter 3 times in 4 years and haven't heard her voice in over a year. I moved from NJ to FL to start a new life and get a divorce. My wife told me she'd come back "when I was an elder". F*** that.
The point? I WANTED to do the right thing and support my family. The elders sure valued my abilities and intelligence, and made full use of them, but when that same brain discovered all the lies, errors, coverups and other WT garbage, then I became garbage. I was only reproved, but no one will have anything to do with me.
I now am active on Silent Lambs and we are seeking media exposure to bring down the WT once and for all. Some of us are writing books. I obtained a BA in Psychology over a year ago with a 99 GPA. I broke my back to do that so that I could attack the WT based on the psychological damage they do, not on doctrine. There are hundreds of books arguing about the trinity, hell, etc. But a book, if I could get on TV or radio. that highlighted broken families, suicides, etc. would be dynamite.
You are right about having done nothing with your life. If I had gotten that degree at 27 years old when I married, l would have been earning six figures easily. Instead, as a JW, I had Mickey Mouse jobs (some a little better) for most of my JW life. What a waste. I'm in my mid-50's now and have to start over. I liked your example of the music student. I know he could have done more, I could have taught him. I also am self-taught on piano, studied to be a concert pianist, and gave lessons. The concert career was just taking off when I got baptized. Guess what they suggested?? You got it, stop playing and try to become an elder some day. I stupidly followed that advice.
I have not meant any of this to brag. I'm trying to demonstrate that people here, all of us, have gifts and talents that we probably were not "allowed" to make full use of. I read Amazing's story about how he got his family out. I think he's the engineer from Oregon, where 2 of my fleshly brothers live. The WT has stunted the emotional and economic growth of so many people that all they have left is McDonald's, moving in with grown children, or welfare.
I ask one final question. How does this glorify God's name??? If his "chosen people" are viewed as such losers by the world, how can the WT point to any paradise among the JW's? I find it very hypocritical that the WT will make use of college libraries or the few JW's at Bethel who DID go to college to try to defend their writings, but when the other 99% of the world that are NOT JW's and went to college disagree, they mock our "worldly wisdom". I'll put my knowledge of life AND the WT's history up against ANY living JW on the planet. You WT lurkers: "I challenge any of you to a debate on ANY topic you publish." Put your money where your big mouths are.
Thank you all for your patience. And thanks again, Anitar. I hope my story helps tie in with yours.