You have to learn to laugh at yourself. If you can laugh at yourself, then embarrassing moments aren't so bad. As for regrets about what could have been, I've learned to look at the good things I have in my life. If things had been different in the past, I probably wouldn't have these good things now, and I wouldn't be the strong person I am today. And now I live my life with the motto, "No regrets." When it comes to making a decision, I think, "Will I regret it later if I don't do it?"
Wolfgirl
JoinedPosts by Wolfgirl
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14
How do you deal with regret?
by sonnyboy ini'm wondering if anyone here has devised good techniques for handling regret.. i've been thinking about high school a lot lately, and "what could have been" is eating away at me.
i still had the dub mentality, and i didn't really associate with many people.
i was constantly called a 'snob' because i kept to myself, and i had people asking me to do things after school all the time, people who could have been life-long friends.
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My story - part One.
by diamondblue1974 ini have never posted my story on jwd and it was only recently that it occured to me that i should really make more of an effort to; here is the first part....sorry if its longwinded.... .
i was brought up in the borg from the age of 18 months old and as you can understand i have known little else.
previous to being in the truth my mother was an unwanted child and beaten by her mother, sure enough she fell into an abusive relationship with my father which left her with minus zero confidence and on the verge of a nervous breakdown; apparently my mum was considering throwing us both off a railway bridge she was that depressed and to her there was no point in living.
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Wolfgirl
I nearly felt like I was reading about my own "mother." I'm sorry you had to go through all that. :(
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Questions You Could NEVER Ask Your Elders
by minimus injwd is great for giving us the opportunity to ask questions and get answers to things that you could never ask in a kingdom hall.
what are some questions that are simply taboo amongst the "friends"?
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Wolfgirl
Questions I actually asked:
"Brother Stalker has repeatedly threatened to rape and kill me in front of everyone in the KH, and you do nothing? If he was mentally capable in your eyes to make the decision to dedicate his life to God (WTS) and be baptised, then he is aware enough to know what he is doing is wrong. Therefore, you can take action."
No action was taken, other than me filing police reports and getting chewed out by the elders for it.
"Did you really expect there to be an audience when my husband decided to rape me?" when confronted with that good ol' two-witness rule.
"How can you allow a confessed child molestor to give talks about being a good father? And how can you press him to remain an elder, knowing what he did?"
Question I wish I had asked:
"Do you realise you will be held accountable if any other children are abused by this same man? What if it were your kids?" -
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Walking through the neighborhood - then and now
by alias innot ringing a single bell .
isn't it awesome to take a stroll through the neighborhood with a friend or significant other.
to gaze at the homes you pass and admire the flower gardens, manicured yards, a pop-up in the backyard.
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Wolfgirl
I just got in from a walk through the neighbourhood. So relaxing. And I could put my hands in my jacket pockets coz I wasn't holding onto any stupid bags.
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Wolfgirl
Orrrr not.
Me in a helicopter:
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Who all here was personally helped by JWD
by Ticker ini was and i am ever thankful to this board and all the wonderful members on it that have contributed to my freedom.
thankyou all so much and i think i might be becoming a jwd addict.
i love this board it is so helpful.
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Wolfgirl
I have been. I was DF'd but was considering going back when I found this board. It opened my eyes to a lot of things I didn't think about before. Now I am well and truly free.
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A JW has an interactive 2004 preaching map on his website
by acsot indon't know if it will link directly or if you have to type the url into your browser.
http://www.ilabmedia.com/service_year/
in case you need help with the "ministry school" or if you are the talk coordinator, there are all kinds of helpful hints on his website.
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Wolfgirl
Can someone please send me a theocratic e-card that I can read while listening to my Kingdumb Melodies jukebox? *gag* LOL! Someone has too much time on their hands. They should get busy living a real life!
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witnoid weddings
by katiekitten inwhen i was a kid weddings in the troof were a big deal.
probably because they were the main if not only excuse for a knees up.
if someone was getting married they were not in control of the decisions about the reception.
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Wolfgirl
All the weddings I remember as a teen, I never got to dance. My parents always made sure we left the reception just as the dancing was starting. I think they didn't want me to have fun. Hee-hee! I was so sure that if I could just get such-and-such brother to dance with me, we'd get married. God, how stupid was I?
Then when my sister got married, I was supposed to be her maid-of-honour. But my father did not approve of the person I had just started seeing (as in, we talked on the phone, and went to people's houses in groups together) because he was not yet baptised. So I got kicked out of my sister's wedding, much to my non-JW relatives' anger and dismay. My sister said I ruined her wedding. Not that she could stand up to our father and say she wanted me in the wedding.
No one in my family came when I married my first husband. We got married at the courthouse. No reception. Divorced a year later, coz he was a prick.
My second wedding was in Hong Kong, post-DF. We were living there, and everyone has to get married at the Registrar's office, and then you can have your own ceremony somewhere else and do whatever you want. We just did the Registrar's office with a few friends and my husband's mother, and then we went out for a meal and drinks in Lan Kwai Fong that night. It was great! No stress, no pushy people trying to get THEIR way at OUR wedding. :) -
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Memories of your JW Youth
by Nosferatu inafter reading the responses to amazing1914's recent post, i decided this would be a great thread to start.
please share some of your memories!.
when my mother first became a jw, i was very sporatic with meeting attendance.
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Wolfgirl
I was a gangly, sickly, scrawny kid, so not only did I not have (or be allowed to have) friends in school, but I didn't fit in at the KH either. There was one guy there who was nice to me all through us growing up together, and we were good friends. But everyone else was incredibly rude to me. They'd talk about all the fun things they were doing in front of me, but I never got invited anywhere. I retreated into my own little world in my head for most of the time, and read a lot.
As I got older, I was so lonely, but still got mocked all the time. As a typical teenage girl, there were so many cute boys around. Hee-hee! Then I hit 14, my body filled out to look more like a woman than a kid, and I got contacts. All of a sudden, some of the "worldly" guys started noticing me. But of course, I wasn't allowed to do anything about it. Still no JW interest, and I wouldn't have been allowed to date until I got out of school anyway. You know, the whole 'can't date unless you're ready to get married' thing.
One guy at school asked me out, and I said yes. I was terrified but excited at the same time. It's not like we went anywhere; I was too scared I'd get caught. We just held hands and kissed. That lasted all of a week before some other JW saw us and reported me to my parents. I had to sit in a JC for that. I did that once more a couple of years later, and got in another JC for kissing a "worldly" guy. *sigh*
I was one of the elders' kids who didn't get away with a bloody thing. I was told by another elder, "I'm holding you up as an example for my daughter, so don't mess it up."
It didn't matter how much I did or tried, nothing was ever good enough, and I wasn't accepted into any of the cliques in the KH. I was still the loner.
It wasn't until I got out from under my parents' control that I started to be able to think for myself a bit. That's when I started realising how much I hated going out in field service, and how boring the meetings were. When I lived at home, I had no choice, and the programming was even more intense than at the KH, as was the hitting.
I remember wishing just once, once, could I please have one of those cupcakes that the kids brought in for a birthday. Or what went on in those assemblies I wasn't allowed to go to. Or why all the choral programs (I was in chorus) were on Tuesday or Thursday nights, so I could never be in them. Or what a school dance was like. Or why couldn't I just have a boyfriend? And on and on...
Basically a life of social isolation, sexual repression, and mind-numbing boredom, interspersed with abuse.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad I'm out and free. :) -
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Hey I talked to a Dub at the door today!
by FreeWilly infinally, the dubs pried themselves away from the coffee shop this morning and 'worked' my neighborhood.
i saw them coming so i had to decide what topic to discuss.
well after the intro, i decided to explain, that yes i have read the bible, and i feel the god portrayed in it is very brutal and cruel to his creation.
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Wolfgirl
That's a good one. I'll have to remember that. If they ever come around. Well done!