millie210

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Posts by millie210

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  83

  Relationship Issues: Boundaries, Freedom of Choice and Codependency

  by 00DAD in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  relationship issues: boundaries, freedom of choice and codependency .

  i just read a very interesting thought in the book, "boundaries" by cloud & townsend.

  the basic problem in human relationship is that of freedom.

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  millie210

  Thanks Oub, this looks like a good thread to read!
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  40

  Crazyguy is going batshit crazy a Rant

  by Crazyguy in

  1. social
  2. family

  yesterday some jw's came over to my house and were even being nice to me, most of the time if they do come by an elder or ms may say something but the others will not, its even hard for them to say just hello (how pathetic).

  ( they also do this behind my back as if i don't know).

  i now realize by not being their i've handed my kids right over to them!.

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  millie210

  I have never heard that St Augustine quote and I absolutely love it.

  Once again, a big thank you Outlaw!!!
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  40

  Crazyguy is going batshit crazy a Rant

  by Crazyguy in

  1. social
  2. family

  yesterday some jw's came over to my house and were even being nice to me, most of the time if they do come by an elder or ms may say something but the others will not, its even hard for them to say just hello (how pathetic).

  ( they also do this behind my back as if i don't know).

  i now realize by not being their i've handed my kids right over to them!.

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• 

  millie210

  Crazyguy,

  I feel so bad for you! The pressure you are feeling is obvious in every word you wrote.

  In addition to understanding where you are coming from entirely, I think you need to be talked down a bit - just for today.

  Someone - ANYONE encouraging your child to call them Dad is crossing the line. Aunt or Uncle? Maybe/maybe not - other factors could be involved...we have an old lady never married no children who teaches piano and has for 40 years. All the kids call her Aunt Sue" and now the grown folks take their kids to "Aunt Sue" for lessons. That is a situation where it seems appropriate for all involved.

  I guess you have to look at the intent behind it huh?

  In your case, I cant think of one single good intention in telling children who have a father in their lives to call someone else Dad.

  That needs to stop IMO. Having said that, I think there is a way to go about it that leaves you in charge and with your dignity intact.

  1) Act dont re-act

  2) Begin with the end in mind.

  Just because you are right doesnt negate the need to be calm and courteous. Wait till you feel in control of your emotions and calm. Use short simple sentences and dont go off in other directions about other issues. Something simple such as " I am their Dad, but they can call you "Br Bob" instead of Br. Jones if you prefer" (assuming the mans name is Bob Jones)

  As far as the other issues you raised about this being war and such, those are long term discussion issues that many people will have thoughts on so I will stay away from that except to say that war means different things to different people. I feel I am fighting a war for my family who is "in" but I am on the surface, calm and agreeable. I will stick with this tactic as long as it works. When it doesnt work anymore I will re- look at what to do next.

  In my personal life experience, head on aggression rarely works so I dont use it. I usually view life as a series of compromises and try to get some of what I want while allowing others the same courtesy.

  When you mention your oldest son is smart and might ask a question such as if you believed you would see the dead person again or weather he was going to be resurrected...

  that looks like a GREAT teaching moment between father and son!

  Why cant you address the second part first and say "son the truth is no one knows if people will be resurrected or not. It is something that many cultures have stories about and many holy books talk about. In our culture the Bible speaks of this and many people feel better and more comforted by the hope of that. That hope - when no one really knows for sure - is called faith."

  As for the first part where he asked what YOU believe, just tell him but keep it as simple and brief as you can and let HIM ask for more detail later.

  I know you dont know me and I am not trying to tell you how to handle your situation but I just feel your pain shows in your words and I can see why you are so frustrated.

  Sometimes just knowing we are NOT crazy for seeing what we are seeing and feeling what it makes us feel, is a comfort in itself.

  Hang in there!
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  31

  A True Story: PORTRAIT OF A GIRL and her dog

  by Terry in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  portrait of a girl and her dog.

  (a true story by terry edwin walstrom).

  her name was cheryl ann draper and she was about 11 years old the day she begged her daddy, who worked at a gas station, to let her go with him to work.

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  millie210

  Terry this was riveting! Truly!

  I hope you print out your most amazing words and then frame them alongside the picture. That way she will always be remembered.

  If I saw that framed picture with the attached story in an antique store (like you mentioned above) I would buy it.

  Actually, you should submit this story and the picture to a photography competition.

  Extremely well written. Bravo!
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  21

  Did You Ever Hear a Non-Witness Opinion After They'd Attended Their first Meeting?

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i was about 12. i took a friend along to a meeting and he said he didn't mind learning stuff but it was a shame it was so boring.. i was about 14. i had my very own bible study and took him along.

  he just kept whispering about the girls there that he fancied.. i was in my early 20's.

  i took along a lady that i knew.

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  millie210

  I took a friend to an assembly for her first exposure to anything "witnessy"...

  During the experiences, she leaned over and asked me why did the people get up and brag?

  How was that Christian?

  Now, I could set her mind at ease by telling her the experiences are made up conglomerations of events but I didnt know that at the time.
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  35

  why did the sacrafice have to be so BRUTAL

  by Tater-T in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  why did the sacrifice have to be so brutal... i mean what value does that add to the equation of justice.couldn't he jesus have came down and just been slaughtered like a regular sacrifice without the brutal torture.why is justice served by brutalityanyone anyone bueller... lolnow you know i don't like to type for hours but this is always bothered me

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  millie210

  I have always been bothered by the sacrifice of Jesus but mine took a different form...

  I could never understand how it was that big of a deal if he know ahead of time all he had to do was XYZ and he would get resurrected in less than 72 hours,

  There are many people who die for causes they believe in with NO promise of reliving in 72 hours or even with any certainty of a future life at all.

  The Bible even refers to that kind of sacrifice as saying "greater love hath no man than that he lay down his life for another."

  So Jesus didnt lay down his life, he surrendered it briefly, Maybe the beatings and the court trail and the horrific things he endured were to distract from that fact?
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  17

  Where's this going? American soldiers call on Jehovah

  by fulltimestudent in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  the song is 'days of elijah,' and the bit i'm referring to is about half way through, as they sing, "there is no god like jehovah":.

  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjz_ilp9c5a.

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  millie210

  Its really too bad isnt it?

  Jehovah is just a name. It can and should be used by anyone who wants to in any song or book.

  BUT...the JWs have given it such a bad connotation that the name is controversial and conjures up bad feelings in people.
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  35

  A Judicial experience.

  by John Aquila in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  when i was an elder in the 80s, a 16 year old baptized jw girl had confessed that at school during lunch a boy kissed her and touched her privates over her dress.

  the circuit overseer was in town and we told him of the situation and he called the society and then told us that mother said we were not allowed to conduct the funeral in the kingdom hall or anywhere else with the threat of removing us and being dealt with judicially if we disobeyed.

  the mother who is about 79 years old comes once a year to talk to my mom about the situation.

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  millie210

  That story breaks my heart John.

  Nevertheless, Im glad you shared it. It helps me to remember exactly why I am fading, being calm with the crazy, (my siblings) and trying to rebuild and regroup.

  This organization didnt deserve you.

  Im glad it no longer has you.
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  39

  2016 SPECIAL TALK---ARE YOU ON THE ROAD TO EVERLASTING LIFE?

  by suavojr in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  are you on the road to everlasting life?.

  note to the speaker: help bible students and interested ones to understand why and how to make further spiritual progress..

  emphasize the many sources of help available, and warmly encourage them to act without delay.

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  millie210

  All the Watchtower and the one Awake quote(s) are from the last 10 years so can we assume that they are still standing behind what theyve put in print in the last ten years?

  How faithful of them!

  How unchanging and permanent!

  Their Holy Spirit is really coming through for them!
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  39

  Let’s Speculate!!!

  by John Aquila in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  you know the organization is slowly going down.

  not as fast as we would wish, but nevertheless it is crumbling.

  five (5) year old child baptisms, smaller magazines, child sexual abuse exposed, smaller annual growth, no one wants to reach out, young ones leaving.

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  millie210

  I think SloppyJoe called it pretty well.

  In addition I think there will be assemblies will be watched from home streamed online or on TV with some provision to make sure people donate.

  (just like the Mormons do it now)

  A university education program of their own (perhaps online) focusing on legal, financial and IT degrees. (tomorrows window washers and janitors)

  Witnessing will be done by those wishing to do so - an elite group kind of like pioneers are now. The rest will be assured their donations are "them being part" just like the Levite tribe did the worship and the rest supported that tribe.