From everyone's comments I can see that I am not the only one that has had a bumpy ride in the marriage department.
It looks like most here that have commented have decided that religion and spirituality are rubbish so I guess my situation is a bit different there.
I consider myself a Christian and after becoming inactive realized that Jesus IS the thing. He is who we are supposed to "witness" for. HIS is the name above all others.
I go to most meetings with my wife for the sake of peace but it does get hard when I see things that are quite offensive to someone who loves Jesus and it is difficult not to make comments.
I watch sermons online and read different translations of the bible. I keep it secret like I am watching porn or something. LOL
My wife knows I don't believe everything the org spouts out but has such a superficial view of spirituality that going with her to meetings seems to be good enough. At least for her. She leaves it up to Jah to judge me most of the time. Especially since I have been trying to put on the new personality of a Christian and not the one encouraged by the publishing company organization.
I think she actually likes me more now that I am not all high on my male superior attitude that the Dubs encourage. I have been a complete arse in the years passed and though I still have my moments, I do believe the holy spirit is making his changes in me. At least I hope so.
She has asked me to pray with her more so I have been doing that but it sometimes feels awkward because my prayers are so different than those generally made by a JayDub.
One of these days maybe I'll grow the cojones to make a firm stand. Until then, I try to love her as Christ loved the congregation and forgive her as best I can when she says something cultish and cruel. And prey...oh how I pray that she will discover Jesus Christ out Lord Savior AND God.