Dearest Lost Puppy, My family is also bi-polar, OCD with anxiety disorders. We were also multi-generation JW's. Though the idea's of living a moral life with those who support you as a community sound wonderful. That is not what is actually practiced. There are some sincere ones but, the overwhelming schedules and guilt really play havoc on those who are more limited on what they can handle. Don't go back. Get professional assistance.Read self help books. Eat healthy foods with natural fats ( this is very important for the brain to function). Go to bed early, as early as needed so that you wake up well rested. For some who are affected by the seasons it could be 10 or 11 hours, especially if you have been under stress. Spend time in sunlight and maybe take extra vitamin D in the morning. After you feel a little more stable join a group that shares an interest ( for example: swimming,pottery, cos-play).
notalone
JoinedPosts by notalone
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16
I want to be a JW but they seem to hate me? Help!
by Alostpuppydog injust going to give a little background about myself and then bring anyone who is reading this up to speed with where i am today:.
growing up in a family that was not aware of jehovah's witnesses at all, as none of my family members have had a run-in with them other than my parents, my entire life has been a mess ever since we met them.
the witnesses first came to my door when i was 12 and my dad started bringing me to meetings and we even lived with a witness family for a month when we were both homeless due to my parent's divorce.
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notalone
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Is this a sign then, should I lol?
by Alostpuppydog inso the elder (who was my teacher) has informed the rest of the congregation and has now revolked my enterance into their or any hall.
and so now they are looking into getting a restraining order and have called new york and that's what they have decided to do.
just because i was made to feel so depressed and hated that i was thinking of suicide.
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notalone
I know your heart is breaking and you feel there is nothing left but something extreme.Take a deep breath. This is a beautiful day and you have been shown a deep truth about those around you. Accept it as the gift it is.You now can make choices you mat not have been able to make before. If the deep dark feelings become all consuming go to a hospital. Tell them your thoughts. This may sound scary, but it will help to get support and a perspective that those now around you aren't giving you. They could also get you in touch with social services that my help.As for not being allowed back to the hall, the same threat was given to our family. We were shocked but looking back it removed any temptation to go back. As to the restraining order-YEAH!!! That means you don't have to worry about ones stopping by with guilt trips and threats. Get a Lawyer! You will be given the opportunity to defend yourself before it is extended for the usual maximum of a year. If you have been hospitalized and received treatment this can be used as a good defense..They only last usually a year. after that there would have to be brought forward reasons why the threat is believed to be continuing. The point is this day has it's own beauty, try and see it. Think don't react and rely on professionals and their advice. In five years you will look back on this as your story that brought you to real truth.You have our love.
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Help with fading, please...
by longgone ini just left about six months ago and i'm going through the emotional whirlwind that comes with it.
i would really appreciate some advice on how to keep this fade from turning into my being disfellowshipped.
i'm another born in, third generation.
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notalone
Thank you for sharing so much of what you are facing.You are not alone. There are many of us. Last year I sent an email to all the elders in our congregation stating that due to my family's mental condition, and so to make sure we understand everything, that all future communication be only through letters or email, that there would be no personal interactions. This spring two elders showed up at our door and attempted to enter our home. We immediately contacted our lawyer that sent cease and desist letters through registered mail including a requirement not to discuss us with anyone. We were then told by a friend that they contacted bethel and were told to leave us alone. In your case I would included all persons that have 'stalked' you. They will spread rumors about you, but these were not really your friends anyway. Reach out to people who accept and value the person you are.
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Help with fading, please...
by longgone ini just left about six months ago and i'm going through the emotional whirlwind that comes with it.
i would really appreciate some advice on how to keep this fade from turning into my being disfellowshipped.
i'm another born in, third generation.
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notalone
I am also a born in 4th gen close to 50. Stay away from the meetings, you have been programmed to return. Things will be said that will only heighten your imposed guilt and open you to their control. I understand your concern for your father, but you also mentioned a sister. One of the big traps is there is always someone who will be upset with you for not behaving the way they want you to. You can't please all of the people all of the time. As any witness understands those who don't love truth will fight against you.
You sound like someone who values truth. Does you father value truth and instill that love in you? Honor him by remaining a person of integrity. You don't have to hit them with everything you have learned or every decision you make. This is sadly another programing tool to control us. As they themselves bring out, they do not tell a new study everything at once but they do it when they are ready. So follow this example and only say what will be beneficial for them. This is something I do. There is a site called Borean Pickets they discuss recent meetings and point out inconsistencies. I also follow any new announcements on this site. I then proactively slip this into conversations and use terminology that makes JW's feel safe. Example: "It's just like they said in morning worship the other day... You know what was brought out in the convention this summer... " I made a point that I am having trouble getting out right now but this is giving me the opportunity for 'deepening' my personal study with an interlinear and looking at the Hebrew and Greek. Go on and on about words and definitions. Guess what, most witnesses are not scholars so they will just tune you out. I did in depth research on the words translated as sin.and shared it with everyone, they just smile and nod. But the best advice I can give is keep proving to yourself this is not the truth. Look up everything and keep records so that you can look back and see what you have accomplished. I have several folders and periodically opening them and just scanning them strengthens my resolve.
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Did anyone vote yet?
by NewYork44M ini voted today in nyc.
a well organized process.
very busy and most of the people voting were african american.
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notalone
First in 100 years to vote. We didn't know if we were quite ready to take that step but, we really felt it was a moral obligation.Afterwards we were quite let down. The heavens didn't open up. Locusts didn't pour out from some deep crevice of the earth, and no marks appeared for the angels to see that we were henceforth condemned to eternal destruction. All I got was a sticker.
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JW's know how to guilt trip....
by HereIgo inwhen i left the org, the jw's tried their best to guilt trip me.
some of the questions i was asked and things i was told:.
"how could you possibly be happy outside of jehovah's organization?
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notalone
Here's one:
So how are you?
Well, I'm not dead yet, so your not bloodguilty.
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Anybody else having trouble walking away?
by JW-Matrix inok...so i'm a 19 year old fifth generation jw.
mentality, i've been out of the "truth" since i was 16(woke up after i was baptized ironically), but on the outside i'm a model jw.
my parents are really devoted, my grandparents are super devoted, and so are my ants and uncles.
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notalone
JW Matrix, welcome. I am close to 50 and a fourth gen with my children being fifth.Two years ago we were the uber-witnesses. I had read the IT books, the Proclaimers and everything written by the society since the 50's. I would even call out others during the watchtower citing other publications. I truly and deeply believed it all. Now as of this year three gens have left. All of us. I tell you this to say there is always hope if someone is doing things for the right reason. As a mother I am going to give you a little motherly advice. Have a plan and understand why you are making these choices. While in college build friendships, study hard and get a degree. Save money. Tell everyone you are making plans to move where the need is greater (this is not a lie. There is a great need for you to get away if you want to be the best person you can be). Tell them you would rather interact out in the field if they try to push bethel. When you graduate, find a job that is far enough away that no one could easily drive to and no one knows you. Occasionally, go to a congregation not in the same area, so no one can happen upon your home. Then drop off the radar. Call family occasionally so they know you aren't dead, but don't try to keep a relationship. There are a lot of great people out there, go meet them. You were raised in a cult so be careful that you don't find yourself in co-dependent relationships. Educate yourself on healing and always choose to have people in your life that like the real you and inspire you. If you ever need to talk just message my husband or I.
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Singing
by skimthesurface indespite not wanting to be a jw anymore and not being at meetings for a few months, still have k. songs coming into my head- both from old and new song books - usually whilst working.
anyone else?
how does it make you feel?.
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notalone
I had a particular song that I had sung to my daughter as a lullaby. It was a song that made her feel safe. She did not want us to throw it away, that song that was so much a part of her life. So we changed the lyrics and now we have the memories and freedom.
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Help! I need documents about elderly giving
by notalone inwe are facing an immediate need.the society is trying to set up a guardian over a wealthy.we need documents that show that they will try to influence him to get his money..
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notalone
thank you, thank you wifibandit. That is just what I needed.shirlyw and zeb this person is a family member that due to death threats on his part we have a restraining order against . The court is now trying to determine who should be temporary guardian. The ward preference is considered.He has put froward someone he has only known for a couple of years who was a long time bethalite. We have seen notes that suggest he may be planning to give the org a million dollars, so we expect a fight, but he is severely mentally ill and deemed so by the state. I will keep you updated. Thanks again for the quick replies.
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Help! I need documents about elderly giving
by notalone inwe are facing an immediate need.the society is trying to set up a guardian over a wealthy.we need documents that show that they will try to influence him to get his money..
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notalone
We were at court today,when this person was presented. We need to make quick arguments to not allowing a Jw to have financial control.