Three years ago I was totally in. I read everything- watchtower, science, history, philosophy,health. I am insatiable when it comes to learning and I loved a good debate. My sibling is a nuclear physicist who had been raised in the org but never became baptized. We had deep conversations using both the Bible and secular knowledge- not the org's literature.I recognized that most of those I knew within the org did not have this same love of learning. I always credited it to living in small towns in the deep south. I always tried to broaden their horizons by adding references outside the given articles. I was always outspoken on issues I felt were not accurate. Well, it was around this time, three years ago, I found myself screaming at articles and blackening out what was not accurate or was misleading. I would add notes next to these areas that counteracted the thought. After about three articles that had sizable redactions, I put them to the side- something was wrong. They were wanting complete obedience without questioning, something I would never give. This coincided with a profound personal situation that made it clear that the moral standards I believed in did not exist within this org. So I did what I do, but now we have the internet and access to more information then I had ever had before. I woke up and my whole family came with me. There were a few others like me , they also have left. I don't know, but it seems that those who really think have left, are leaving or are being pushed out.
notalone
JoinedPosts by notalone
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16
"Intelligent" Witnesses
by megaboy inafter reading some experiences, i have found that this organization has had quite a big change in its operations within the last decade.
back when i was talking to the ocassional witnesses at a local hotspot i remember some of them having respectable intelligence.
what i want to know though is those who have been aquainted with who they felt were more educated and independent in thinking, how they handled the rapid changes.
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notalone
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Elder/MS requirement for marriage talk? (Wedding not in KH)
by respectful_observer inokay team,.
some family friends who are engaged are getting some flack around the particulars of their wedding ceremony (surprise!
"strain out the gnat, gulp down the camel", and all that).
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notalone
When we got married, we were both pioneers, we were told that I had not been in the cong long enough for a kingdom hall wedding. So we married with the Justice of the peace and had a relative give a talk at a small ceremony afterwards.Some who heard we were not getting married in the hall were not going to attend assuming we had done something wrong. Nearly thirty years later and I couldn't be happier with that choice. No one told me what music was appropriate. No one had a say as to if the dress was modest enough. No one was involved in any decisions and most important when I look back my wedding it had nothing to do with the org- happy memory.
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Anyone else watching the Leah Remini series "Leah Remini: Scientology and the Aftermath" on A&E?
by NikL inmy wife and i started to watch this last night and have covered only 2 episodes so far but it is really interesting.. there are so many similarities between scientology and wt.
not in beliefs of course but in their shunning, of their version of apostates etc.. it was amusing for me to see my active jw wife watch and get all indignant.
at one point a statement was made that a religion "shouldn't separate families" and she muttered to herself "absolutely not".. i am kind of hoping that jws will watch and see what is being carried on by a high control cult and eventually recognize it in their own lives.
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notalone
I am encouraging my JW friends to watch it.Telling them it is ' a very tricky religion', and this would be very beneficial to know out in service. I only hope some seeds of realization are planted.
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New member
by NinaCee ini did not see a newbs thread to introduce myself, so my apologies if i'm in the wrong place.
i was a 3rd generation born in witness for 30 years until i was disfellowshipped back in 2007 for making a mistake.
my entire life up until that point was based on and circled around the society, and even though at first i really enjoyed my freedom (i still do), the fact is that i'm still struggling with cognitive dissonance, resentment, and loneliness.. i miss my family all the time.
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notalone
Dearest Ninacee,welcome and love sent your way. As a multi gen-er the ideas, the psychology of the org can become part of your DNA. As a women the way you see yourself, value yourself and interact with others has been scripted by the org. The measuring line to be a 'good' person has been set by a distant group that's main objective was to make you completely reliant on them. First, from my heart I want to say- they are liars! Don't value anything they taught.See it for the twisted manipulation it was. I was a 4th gen around 50. I had raised my children deep in the middle of it all. Then one day after I had physically left, this nice woman I know started to talk about 'grace'. Her heart was so moved as she spoke and yet mine was empty because I had no idea what 'grace' was. I had read the 'bible' cover to cover countless times. I had read the Aid book, the IT books twice and everything the society printed that I could get my hands on - and here I was standing there with no idea what 'grace' was. I am not 'undeserving of kindness'. I will never allow anyone else to ever tell me that again. It hit my heart that they offered no 'truth'. I boxed up all my publications, especially their bible and started my own path. Hear what others have to say but follow no one. Learn, heal and be open to the wonders that surround you, no matter how small.Witnesses put a wall between themselves and everyone else. We feel scared and guilty whenever we cross over that wall. If we have negative experiences when we do it only reinforces their narrative and makes us feel ' we got what we deserved'- NO! We are deserving of kindness. We deserve 'grace'. We deserve dignity. So to you I offer this- Breathe...Heal...Learn...Love...You deserve it.
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God's word-the publications?
by notalone inokay, so i have a friend that still interacts with my family.
she is going through some difficult times, so i suggested she just read some of psalms.
she became a little agitated and said she would just listen to the mags.
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notalone
Okay, so I have a friend that still interacts with my family. She is going through some difficult times, so I suggested she just read some of Psalms. She became a little agitated and said she would just listen to the mags. I couldn't understand the aversion to the Bible.Then she told me that at the recent CO's visit he explained that in the Bible when God's word is referred to in small letters that this refers to all of his words as expressed through 'god's organization'. They are now claiming that 2000+ years ago man was instructed to listen to 'words' from God that would not even exist for 2000 years, and if that's the case- What 'words' in the interim would also count as God's 'word'. Would the Catholic church or the Eastern Orthodox church be able to claim that their teachings were on par with the Bible? Could Mohammad qualify as uttering God's 'word'? I know they are under mind control, but come on. Has anyone else heard about this?
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1st christmas ever
by notalone inso, i am around 50,4th gen born in- christmas.
strange thing this christmas thing.
i've been watching people this year, really watching them.
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notalone
By the way, when we got the cards. I had to hide them under everything. I kept finding myself looking around, making sure no one could see them- strange thing . Okay, maybe the gas passing penguin is in bad taste, but hiding them- oh well.
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1st christmas ever
by notalone inso, i am around 50,4th gen born in- christmas.
strange thing this christmas thing.
i've been watching people this year, really watching them.
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notalone
So, I am around 50,4th gen born in- Christmas. Strange thing this Christmas thing. I've been watching people this year, really watching them. I was always told people don't really like Christmas. That it is stressful. That it makes people selfish. That suicide rates go up. Strange- that is not what I am seeing. My family joined a group that will be having a Christmas party. There will be some sort of gift exchange game. So today, for the first time in my life we went Christmas shopping. It was fun. We were thinking about the others and how to make them happy. We then went to pick out some cards. We thought of each person, of what they were going through in their lives. We thought of what would make them laugh. Then it hit FEAR!!! Not the fear I am doing something wrong, not the fear I could get in trouble, it was fear that if those who really love us and have continued to interact with us and yet still believe everything in the cult found out we had bought Christmas cards would be heart broken. I know how they feel.There is this idea that even if you don't agree with some things or you don't come to meetings that God can still reach you.There is this belief that if a person has any good in them and they understand the 'origins' of Christmas,they can not participate in it. If someone leaves and celebrates holidays or puts out political signs all is lost. There is no longer any good left in them. Armageddon is all that awaits them, and for those who loved them-endless pain. They have affronted God himself. So today, I had fear for the pain that others could feel. Then I got angry, what horrible cruel lies they ensnare sincere ones with. Then I asked- How? How did they convince so many to go along with this? My family knew nothing else, but how do they convince someone who experienced nice holidays to give them up? I came up with that they convince us that there are all these secret hidden traps ready to get us and that if we are special 'God" will show us these traps. We become paranoid- always expecting the traps. All we eventually need is for someone to say, " It's a trap." and we run in panic. We don't even stop to see if it really is a trap. We don't even stop to see f the person saying ' it;s a trap' is an honest or kind person. We are just jumping through the hoops trying to avoid these 'traps'. I guess all I needed to do was to stop, and see what is really happening. Guess what I found- Christmas is really beautiful, kind and full of laughter.
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2017 JWN Christmas Card Exchange
by blondie inin years gone by i have organized and coordinated this.
pm me if you want to be added to the list giving me your snail mail address and/or your e-mail for those with tech skills and a safe e-mail.. do this by december 14, and i will pm the list to each person on it.
latecomers will be added but you may not get it by christmas.
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notalone
I really like the idea, but due to cult induced paranoia I feel compelled to ask- How do we know that our information won't fall into undeserving hands?
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Need input: elders showed up at our door today
by de-opresso-liber inso as i announced last week, my wife and i started our fade and i sent in a letter to our body that i was stepping down and cited the arc as the reason and insisted that we not be bothered.
my wife told a few relatives in person that we weren't going to attend meetings any longer (immediate shunning occurred, the new videos must be effective) and that what we found with the arc shocked us etc etc.
i have an inside track on how this is all going down by an awake elder on the body, co told them to handle the matter quickly.
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notalone
I guess the question is are you ready to be completely shut off or do you think by being quiet you may actually benefit someone.If you want everyone to get this information do this quickly before they get cautious.The reaction will be quick and complete shunning. You will be gossiped about for some time and friends and family will be repeatedly questioned about you. People will also become suspicious of anyone trying to defend you. If you keep up with the slow fade you will still have those that won't talk to you but you may be able to slowly reason with some.If you have older ones that you don't want to upset at this time go for the slow. I bit of advice about going slow- be proud! You have nothing to be ashamed about. You don't have to make a full accounting to them just because they ask..If you see someone in the store walk right up and ask them about service, a meeting or a recent assembly. Get them talking- they like that. If they ask where you are going simply say you are going through something and you don't want to share that information with them at that time.
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10
Depression, Anger and Anxiety
by Sorry infor the last few months, i feel like i've been going through the 5 stages of grief.
lately, it's been happening simultaneously.
in my other posts, i've expressed anger at my family and congregation for their thoughtless ways.
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notalone
I know this may sound hokey, and I don't want to sound weird, but if you are of limited funds, I have a few things that have worked for my family. First, find some support group or maybe a interfaith group.Secondly, for anxiety try 400 mg inositol.It is great for calming down without making you sleepy. You can put the powder directly into water for a quick reaction. The bach flower remedies rock rose ( for panic and nightmares) and cherry plum ( for suicidal thoughts) can take the edge off. I am not by any means suggesting that you not get professional help, in fact I highly recommend it.Most communities have some way you can get help if you are low income, but the wait can be quite long.Take this time to educate yourself on mental health and the effects that mind control and co-dependency have on our reactions.