Posts by 3rdgen

12

What to say? Death of an adult child.

by jwundubbed in

my father married b when both her children and his children were grown adults.

b had two children, a son d and a daughter m. my sister db, my brother rh, and myself got along well with m but not at all with d, who was a very christian person but not a jw.

my siblings and i do not have much to do with our stepmother though we are civil and we don't have any hard feelings between us.

3rdgen

jhine, You have my deepest empathy. (((HUGS)))) How are you doing these days?

Hubby and I were active believing JWs at the time my son died. While I realized JWs are particularly ignorant about boundaries, still I was surprised at the stupidity of some of the comments and actions of "the friends".

The award for the most insensitive comment goes to:

Hubbys Aunt, who said in her card "You will need to get back into field service right away so that you make sure you will be there to see him again in paradise"

The award for most intrusive action EVER goes to:

My son's friend and his quasi JW father. Instead of leaving it up to ME to inform my son's DFed father THEY called him up and told him about the accident and implied we were keeping the death from him.

All hell broke loose and so that awful night I had to suffer the verbal abuse of my ex on top of my unbearable grief.

At least, this and much more helped hubby and me wake up.

12

What to say? Death of an adult child.

by jwundubbed in

my father married b when both her children and his children were grown adults.

b had two children, a son d and a daughter m. my sister db, my brother rh, and myself got along well with m but not at all with d, who was a very christian person but not a jw.

my siblings and i do not have much to do with our stepmother though we are civil and we don't have any hard feelings between us.

3rdgen

Jwundubbed,

Unfortunatunately, my firstborn and only son died from an accident when he was 21 years old. This was in 2004.

What NOT to say:

I know how you feel.

Is there anything I can do? Too general and sounds insincere.

It's much better to ask a specific. Like "Would you like a visit? Would you like a shoulder to cry on? Can I bring you dinner? Would you like some help with the housework?

DO NOT point out his "Resurrection Hope" or he's in heaven now etc. The survivors are in excruciating PAIN. Possibly ANGER They have THEIR OWN thoughts about where their loved one is. Don't insult them by offering platitudes.

DON'T say "At least he's not suffering." Well DUH (Not helpful.)

Don't say I'll pray for you. Who cares? It's bullshit to the person in grief.

DO NOT compare their loss with one of yours. It's not a misery competition.

DO:

Remember and mention things you liked about the deceased especially if you were close. If not, don't pretend.

Keep in touch and offer your e-mail and or phone # if they would like to reach you.

Say "I'm so sorry for your loss" I want to help in any way I can.

Share pictures if you have any.

Share stories about the person. Don't be afraid of embarrassing or funny stories

Write or share a brief poem.

These come to mind now. I'll share more if I think of any.

10

Senior Judge to Revisit Case-Law on Authorizing Medical Treatment Against Wishes of Mature Minor

by Corney in

jw
friends

https://www.bailii.org/ew/cases/ewhc/fam/2020/3003.html.

nearly two weeks ago, sir james munby, a privy council member, formerly a law commission chairman, high court's family division president, and a lord justice of appeal, issued a short emergency order in a blood transfusion case closely resembling mcewan's the children act.. here are some excerpts:.

2. the case involves the deeply troubling question of whether a blood transfusion should be administered to a young woman who is almost, not quite, 16, against her profound religious beliefs.

3rdgen

I know of a case in California (USA) where a baptized girl who was almost 17 at the time, (over 20 years ago) developed Leukemia. She was the daughter of a career Pioneer and the Presiding Elder, very bright and articulate and was able to convince the judge to allow her to decide not to receive a blood transfusion. She soon died.

I had once been in their congregation and knew the entire family well. Even though I was a true believer at the time, I was devastated that this beautiful person was suddenly gone because of a rather flimsy doctrine.

69

2020-10-Publications Approved For Discard! (as of 2020-10-29)

by Atlantis in

jw
friends

2020-10--publications approved for discard.. .

reply below and i'll meet you back at the pm breakroom for coffee and a link.. .

petra!.

3rdgen

Petra, Thanks to you and your family for taking the time to inform us. May I please have a hot cup of coffee and a piece of chocolate?

4

Funnies : Mr. Deity

by Diogenesister in

hi this guy is a classic.

if you have a few mins he's well worth checking out, highly recommended!.

another guy i love on youtube is pinecreek....he has a wonderful, gentle manner as he gets into discussions with christians about god, atheism etc.

3rdgen

IMO not only JWs view prayer this way.

5

We got a letter addressed to Barbara Anderson and my husband!

by 3rdgen in

no kidding!

the return address is the po box for the local kh.

the letter was addressed: .

3rdgen

S&R

In our last conversation where I told her I was no longer a JW she exclaimed, "All my friends have left the organization!!" I knew who she was referring to and smiled inside.

She can't leave because both of her children are PIMI. One is an elder. She will need the care of them as well as the cong. so I don't think she wants any TTATT.

Aclue

IMO there are at least several "Nuts" in every hall. It seems they are the ones who never miss field circus. I can only imagine what the householders must think.

5

We got a letter addressed to Barbara Anderson and my husband!

by 3rdgen in

no kidding!

the return address is the po box for the local kh.

the letter was addressed: .

3rdgen

Jeffro, I was thinking the same thing but wanted to know what others make of this.

5

We got a letter addressed to Barbara Anderson and my husband!

by 3rdgen in

no kidding!

the return address is the po box for the local kh.

the letter was addressed: .

3rdgen

No kidding! The return address is the PO box for the local KH. The letter was addressed:

Barbara Anderson

Husband's full Name

Current correct Address

The handwriting looked familiar. I opened the envelope and found a letter that read as follows:

Dear Neighbor,

Hello! My name is Rose (name changed)

I would much rather chat with you face to face but just not able to at this time.

I want to encourage you to go online + check out our website -JW.org it has VERY interesting information to read.

Did you know the Bible told us about our current crisis as part of the "Last Day" ?(no s)

Go online and read all about it!

I wish you well and healthy!

Sincerely

Rose

I was once a very good friend of this single sister until.....over 20 years ago I found out that my then- husband had given her at least two $500.00 cash gifts. (At the same time, I found out that he had been serial cheating on me with many other women. She was single because her husband divorced her because She had cheated.) She wrote us thank-you notes for these gifts, which is how I found out about the money and her handwriting. I divorced that SOB.

Meanwhile, I remarry, and a few years ago I hear that Rose was in a terrible car accident, nearly died, and was left with a Traumatic Brain Injury. Several years ago we ran into each other where I was working. She now was a shell of her former self and definitely kookie as can be. Trying to get rid of her, I told her I was no longer a JW. She responded, Then, you are an apostate?!!! "No", I said. "I'm just not a believer anymore". She left PRONTO LOL Then sent me an email saying she wants no contact with me because I'm an apostate. Fine. Let the cong. deal with her!

But why the Barbara Anderson reference? Does she have a clue who she is? Well, the whole thing made me laugh and I thought I would share.

21

What`s wrong With American Politics ?

by smiddy3 in

what`s wrong with american politics ?.

96% of american people who got off there arse to vote, chose hillary clinton to be president of the united states of america over donald trump.. and the electoral college overode the will of the majority of the people who bothered to vote , and gave the office of president to donald trump who was the 2nd choice, an also ran , of the will of the people.. it`s a furphy to say that some larger blue/red states can dictate to smaller red/blue states or vice versa to rig the elections ,simply because people can, and do change there preferences in any one state whether it be traditionally red or blue.. both democrats and republicans are both guilty and responsible for the gerrymander that is the electoral college.. there i`ve said it ,.

nobody else seems to be able to say it how it is ,.

3rdgen

What's wrong with American politics?

Extremists are doing most of the talking.

4

Jail Employees Face Charges After Using ‘Baby Shark’ Song to Punish Inmates

by MeanMrMustard in

.

https://www.nytimes.com/2020/10/06/us/jail-baby-shark-charges.html.

3rdgen

Hahaha!

Well, I guess I will have to call Child Protective Services on my daughter 'cuz I think she plays the song to my 2yo grandson.

(mostly without the handcuffs I think)