Whynot

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Posts by Whynot

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  14

  Need advice/opinions about DF Husband who woke up

  by Whynot in

  1. social
  2. family

  my husband was df 3 years ago.

  i still attended meetings but not regularly and for the past 10 months i have not attended any at all.

  my husband wanted to get reinstated until maybe a few months ago when i started to help him to wake up.

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  Whynot

  It would be a mistake for him to get reinstated
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  14

  Need advice/opinions about DF Husband who woke up

  by Whynot in

  1. social
  2. family

  my husband was df 3 years ago.

  i still attended meetings but not regularly and for the past 10 months i have not attended any at all.

  my husband wanted to get reinstated until maybe a few months ago when i started to help him to wake up.

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  Whynot

  My husband told me that he doesn't want to be friends with ANY Jdubs even if he goes back. So, after discussing it with him, he has absolutely no need to be reinstated. He's ready to move on. My friends have cut ties with me which I have come to terms with.

  I really don't have any reason to feel attached to the Borg other than the fact that I invested most of my life in it and that my family is still in. I'm certain I need to see a professional to help me let go. Honestly, I just don't believe in it and haven't for a few years.
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  14

  Need advice/opinions about DF Husband who woke up

  by Whynot in

  1. social
  2. family

  my husband was df 3 years ago.

  i still attended meetings but not regularly and for the past 10 months i have not attended any at all.

  my husband wanted to get reinstated until maybe a few months ago when i started to help him to wake up.

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  Whynot

  I do believe we both are emotionally attached to the Borg. He's currently getting professional help but I'm thinking I should as well. This transition has been hard on us. I have acquaintances but have pretty much cut ties with our JW friends. We're both kind of soul searching right now. Trying to find ourselves outside of the Borg.

  It doesn't make sense to go back just to be DF again do to our new beliefs. It's just that attachment that's difficult to shake off ugh!
• 
  14

  Need advice/opinions about DF Husband who woke up

  by Whynot in

  1. social
  2. family

  my husband was df 3 years ago.

  i still attended meetings but not regularly and for the past 10 months i have not attended any at all.

  my husband wanted to get reinstated until maybe a few months ago when i started to help him to wake up.

  1. 
  2. 
  3. 
• 

  Whynot

  My husband was DF 3 years ago. I still attended meetings but not regularly and for the past 10 months I have not attended any at all. My husband wanted to get reinstated until maybe a few months ago when I started to help him to wake up.

  Now, I think it would be good for him to get reinstated then fade out amd he wanted thus as well. But now he doesn't. The reason I think it would be good for him is because he has depression.

  He doesn't have ANY friends. Not even his co-workers are his friends. I worry about hus mental health but he thinks it's best to just never go back. I guess I'm just not ready to leave it behind 100%.

  I feel really confused and don't know what to think. Help!
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  2

  Shunned: How I Lost My Religion and Found Myself [interview with Linda Curtis]

  by Fay Dehr in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  http://www.tabletmag.com/jewish-life-and-religion/260116/unorthodox-podcast-episode-133-rachel-simmons-linda-curtis-jehovahs-witness.

  fast forward podcast to 42:30 where linda's interview begins.... new york times writer mark oppenheimer interviews linda curtis, whose memoir shunned: how i lost my religion and found myself, chronicles her decision to leave her close-knit jehovah’s witness community, which ultimately led to her being formally shunned by the religion.

  linda tells us about life as a jehovah’s witness, why she left, and why she has no animosity toward the community—and family—that shunned her.

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  Whynot

  I just listened to the interview. I'm so impressed by how successful she has become, wow! She has a book on how to leave a fundamentalist religion. I was hoping she would mention the sex abuse scandal or the failed armageddon predictions but she was too polite imo. But we all have different reasons for leaving.

  She has excellent information on her website about leaving with honor. She oozes positivity.
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  39

  Major Article in Today's Philadelphia Inquirer on JW Child Abuse

  by Room 215 in

  1. watchtower
  2. scandals

  http://www.philly.com/philly/news/jehovahs-witnesses-sexual-abuse-children-beliefs-rules.html.

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  Whynot

  That second to last paragraph made me tear up. (Sigh) Excellent article! I'm saving it
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  23

  Wasted A #@$%&!** Day

  by FedUpJW in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  well i got to waste another day.

  for the sake of still in family i attended the circuit assembly.

  they say a joy shared is doubled, and a burden shared is halved.

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  Whynot

  Did they also mention how they demand insurance checks in exchange for rebuilding ypur house after a natural disaster? Non-jedubs can also get their houses rebuilt as long as they give up their insurance checks.
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  8

  Has anyone seen this?

  by wokeup in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  google: vintage freemason compilation collinsworth family.. several pages into the program has a familiar face..

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  Whynot

  Those pictures are pretty cool. Too bad it's not the WTBT C.T. Russell
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  65

  Withdrawing community support in the congs

  by purrpurr in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i've noticed in the past 10 years that the social support that used to be available in the congs, a shoulder to cry on, elders to help with family/marriage issues these seem to have been purposely withdrawn.

  counsel is even heard from the platform that the elders are not there to help people with their problems.. so first in the 80s-90s they take away the congregation get to getters and social events and now they seem to be going one step further in taking away the emotional support for people too.. this will take away an aspect that i'm sure was keeping alot of people in the borg, the community support.

  if that's not there and its just about meetings and ministry how many will start to get their emotional support elsewhere?.

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  Whynot

  Personal experience, one of the first things I learned as a new witness many, many years ago is that you're on your own emotionally. It didn't really bother me until I got separated from my husband. People avoided me like I was diseased or something. The elders didn't talk to me until a month later. They also didn't care much for me even though I was going through the worst crisis of my life. Going to the meetings just made it worse. So much shaming. It was brutal and made me question everything. My so called friends who were pioneers married to elders avoided me.

  Elders in some congregations specifically tell married couples in trouble that they are not counselors nor therapists. Their focus is helping the "sheep" spiritually not emotionally.

  When I was going through my ordeal in my marriage the only advuce I got was pray, go to meetings, keep going in service and read the organization's literature on marriage and divorce. It was a joke!
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  16

  Retirement Planning

  by Whynot in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  since waking up i can't help but look at the future in a different way.

  while i was working i felt it was ridiculous for me to start a 401k because i thought for sure the end would come before i retired.

  but now, i'm a stay at home mom with very small children and it bothers me that i have done nothing to prepare for the future.

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  Whynot

  I was a bank teller. I think I really have to take some online courses to keep my brain fresh.