HappyGal

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Posts by HappyGal

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  106

  So what caused you to have doubts in the first place?

  by nicolaou in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i had no doubts at all about the 'truth' untill a friend of mine in the cong' began falling away.

  in trying to help him i had to ask questions and do research and that of course cracked the doors of my mind open for the first time in over thirty years.. years ago, when jwd allowed members to have signatures, i used the following quote from voltaire as mine.

  i still love it.. doubt is uncomfortable, certainty is ridiculous..

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  HappyGal

  It had been a few years since I'd done my fade, still believing I left the "truth" and Armageddon was coming any day now. Late one night I turned the TV on and there was a 30-minute show put on by another religion. The person was discussing topics and scriptures with a JW. Think of it as a Theocratic Ministry Show in reverse. The person was making such a logical argument that for the first time I questioned whether "the truth" was really the truth. Fast forward a few years to the internet and I was fully awake.
  
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  36

  What I miss about going out in service.

  by compound complex in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, very little, to be honest.

  the structure and commitment of the ministry provided discipline necessary to my life.

  therefore, i did it, as required, and felt some sense of fulfillment at the bible study stage.. i do like talking to people.

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  HappyGal

  Looking back, all I see is a monumental waste of time !

  I don't miss much. The coffee breaks were nice. I wish I had that time back!
  
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  47

  I am a Living Time Machine

  by TerryWalstrom in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  which world is this?_________________when the doctor pulled my screaming body out of mom all those 7 decades ago, i landed in a post-wwii world.it was--compared to today's world--an alien planet.. the world i live in today has nothing in common with the world in which i grew up.. there were no cell phones back then--there were black telephones with a dial-tone and an operator who placed your call.

  everywhere you found telephone booths!

  a call was a nickle.where did all those telephone booths go?i dunno.where did my whole world go?i dunno.. tv sets were huge boxes with tubes and small screens.

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  HappyGal

  What a fun post! I'm in the next time machine for those in their 60's. I remember alot of what you mentioned.

  That time machine would have an interesting ride looking just at the things we learned and did as a JW over the years.
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  40

  Wife is Awake

  by freemindfade in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  following the news of stuckinarut2, over the past few months my wife has completely mentally woken up.

  i've been meaning to post but haven't had the time.

  i saw stuckins post and i figured i'd add my news too.

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  HappyGal

  So happy for you both!
  
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  58

  baptised nearly 51 years

  by Phoebe in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  been reading this site for awhile now.

  i have had a long and often tragic life as a jw.

  my story is so long because i'm pretty old :) i feel sad i've been locked in fear and guilt for my entire life.

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  HappyGal

  Phoebe, thank you for sharing your experience. I'm sorry for all the hardships you had to go through and the lack of support you received from your family or the JWs. It is very sad indeed.

  To Life is Short - Your comment "if I dropped dead in the K.H no one would notice" really resonated with me.
  

  I remember the last few months I was going to the meetings. I came to the realization that the only time people would call me was to get a ride to the meeting. I was no more than their free taxi!

  I was part of a congregation and yet felt very alone. I was only good for what I could do to them.

  No more! Life is much happier now.

  Phoebe - Wishing you all the best now. Decide what you'd like to do to make YOU happy!
  
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  40

  All About The Words We Used

  by dubstepped in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  in the time since i've left the borg behind i've had a few things hit me as to how words were used.

  i'm wondering if anyone else has some similar examples, but here are some things that have made me think:.

  watchtower - my whole life i saw this as a thing of protection from outside evil forces, and then when i left someone pointed out "isn't that what they used to keep people in prison".

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  HappyGal

  AWAKE!

  For a JW---- Awake is a magazine to be read and distributed.

  For a former JW---- Awake is someone who knows about TTATT.
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  63

  Life is changing for me: no pioneering, got a job!

  by Skepsis in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a month ago i decided to register in this board.

  i had decided to step down pioneering but was frightened about the consequences.

  i had finished my university degree some months before (despite disaproval from brothers in my congregation) and i had to choose: continue pioneering and working in jobs with no future or starting a career, working full-time.. i was thinking to postpone the decisiton but... i was fed up with preaching.

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  HappyGal

  Congratulations Skepsis on both getting your degree and new job.

  I am going to repeat that - CONGRATULATIONS. That is something you will not hear at the kingdom hall or from a JW. You worked for it and you earned it!

  Lots of good advice here. (wish I had this forum back in the day)
  

  Ask the Body of Elders to help with your finances and see what kind of response you get. lol Tell them you can remain a pioneer and continue with your responsibilities IF they help support you.

  Also ask, will they help with finances if you get sick? What about a retirement plan if you give up your career and pioneer? Mention those bethelites who are getting layed off after giving years of service.
  

  I was told I wouldn't need college as Armageddon would come before I even graduated. That was in the 70's. I put it off way too long and finally got my degree at age 35.

  So well done Skepsis!
  
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  37

  The day after Armageddon

  by Pronger1 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  jws are scattered across the globe.

  a few million people left, pretty isolated from each other.. telephone lines and power goes down since the people who supported the infrastructure are dead.

  communication across town, state, country, etc is cut off.

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  HappyGal

  surely jehofah will save MacDonalds for us in the new world---wont he ?

  Well the Israelites had manna 365 days a year for 40 years.

  What's for breakfast? manna

  What's for lunch? manna

  What's for dinner? manna

  Think I'll skip dinner.
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  13

  New flip flop document - updated from last year

  by Splash in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  about this time last year i uploaded a document as part of my going away post.. as stated at the time i had to lie low, and am still doing so.

  sort of.

  mostly.i pop up rarely to chip in when my 'ardour comes up into my nose' about something lol, but still read the leaks and back-and-forth between the members here.

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  HappyGal

  Thank you Splash for sharing this compilation of flip flops. 176 pages! Wow!!! Appreciate your hard work on it!
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  33

  Leaving the jws is a "lifestyle choice" according to a counsellor

  by purrpurr in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  so i had my first appointment with a counsellor, of course i explained about being a born in jw, mentally leaving, the penalty of doing so and therefore the mental strain of pretending to be someone i'm not.

  her response was that she couldn't help me with that because leaving a cult was a "lifestyle choice".

  i tried to say to her that its a cult not a religion and how it brain washed me but no.

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  HappyGal

  It is much more than a lifestyle choice. It is not as simple as just walking away.
  

  I hope you find someone with the knowledge and experience in dealing with cults.
  

  In the meantime, there are some helpful books out there.

  I like the ones written by Bonnie Zieman. (former JW turned psychotherapist)
  

  1) Fading out of the JW Cult: A Memoir

  2) Exiting the JW Cult A healing handbook for current and former JW's.

  Of course this forum is a great resource as well. Many with experience in leaving a cult!