Posts by Heartsafire

28

I need some advise

by Lost his mind in

following is a letter i am going to send to the entire family both jw and non.

i would like to get your advice on whether i should do it.

my husband has told me before to voice my complaints but i have yet.

You go girl! I think you should send the letter. But, I agree with Dissonant15. Leave the asking for a divorce twice out of it. You are asking for space to heal the marriage, and by saying you have asked for a divorce it sounds as though you have given up.

You are "one flesh" with your husband, and if they are bossing him about behind your back then they are disrespecting both of you. I cannot see any reason why the eldubs would bother you about it, and they may even reluctantly agree with you. Just in case, keep a copy of your letter for your own personal records.

In the past I have had to send letters to JW family while still "in". These people have no concept of boundaries at all. Set some.

19

Identity Theft

by Jerryh in

jw
friends

this forum offers the stories of folks with as many variations as there are folks and a “great crowd” of lurkers whose stories may never be offered.

i am an outsider with a broken heart for some insiders that i love more than they know.

after reading nearly every “apostate” book ever written, lurking, being worn out searching the wt cd, i have come to an idea that i present for your appraisal..

Heartsafire

One problem with the org is that it is extremely controlling and promotes fear instead of real love as its agenda. It is true that some can ignore the "bad" teachings of the org while excepting the "good", but what happens when that individual must then make the choice between obeying the org's commands to abstain from blood or letting their child accept a life saving blood transfusion? If they disobey and choose to blood, they face disfellowshipping and shunning by their friends, family, and congregation. Or, perhaps, the JW is given a promotion at work that would interfere with their attendance at an assembly or convention. The org expects them to attend the convention at all costs. There are many other scenarios that play out here where JW's aren't just guided by scripture but rather controlled by a corporation. Even disagreeing with WT interpretation is a no-no within the group, and it leads to expulsion and shunning. Those who are choosing to stay "in" may seem happy, but they are completely living in denial.

24

General health after learning TTATT

by Darkknight757 in

4 months ago i was conducting the watchtower study along with a long list of responsibilities that come with being an elder in a very goofy congregation.

during this time my health was going down hill.

i've always had a low blood pressure,(102/65 or abouts) but for the past year it had creeped up to 135/90 range.. so 2 months ago after learning ttatt, i'm still considered an elder because the brothers won't let me step down, but i haven't done anything in that time except comment once at a meeting a few weeks ago.

Heartsafire

Well, since I've been missing meetings I haven't been as nauseated!

But seriously, yes, every elder/super-active jdub I know has either very bad health problems (mental and/or physical) or is on medication.

I can honestly say I cannot recall ever meeting a super healthy, happy Jdub elder.

3

CULTS: Inside Scientology & Escaping Jehovah's Witnesses

by Finkelstein in

here is an interesting documentary about people being exploited and manipulated by cults, one which we all know about.. note the coercive tactics that these separate cults use to lure people into them and to eventually control these individuals once they are there .

.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ug1mf4kvkwq.

Heartsafire

Fink,

Thanks for this. Good stuff.

54

"Even if it isn't the truth, it's still the best way to live"

by Simon in

have you heard that old chestnut?

i have.. typically it's the last resort when you have dismantled a jws beliefs and they have no way of defending them.

they know they are beat so they come out with that one.. its effectively an admission that you are right and they have no argument but they are still going to attend meetings because they like the social club.. what a lame way to defend your faith..

Heartsafire

I have very close "worldly" friends that go above and beyond morality compared to many JWs I know. They are very honest, do not cheat on their spouses, volunteer and reach out in the community, encourage others to do good, etc. From what I've learned, the standards practiced in life are unique to each individual whether a JW or not.

53

Finally posting and I'm FRUSTRATED!!!

by stephanie61092 in

okay, i'm about to engage in a major word vomit.

just giving you fair warning as your time may be better spent somewhere else.. so, i'm sitting on my lunch break, bawling my eyes out, and writing on this forum to people i don't know yet probably have a great deal in common with but at the same time, used to scare the daylights out of me.

for years, i would come across this forum and 'lurk' awhile if you will, or see things on youtube.

Heartsafire

Steph,

Two thumbs way up for your heartfelt rant. You are among friends here. I am still baptized and have been inactive for several months now. I envy that you are completely out and you know the truth about the truth (ttatt).

You have big decisions in life headed your way--to go back to the org and live a lie for your family or live authentically according to your own moral compass and face losing them. Unfortunately, I am having to live a lie for my family right now, and it tears me up inside. One of our members (freemindfade) used a really good metaphor today that the JW's are the ones in "prison" and we are the ones walking out into freedom. It is not your fault they choose to stay in this horrible cult.

From what I can see, you're smart, you're strong, you're witty, and you damn sure deserve much better than this right now!

HAF

46

Evolution a Fact - Agreed but So What?

by LAWHFol in

in many debates between believers and non believers (nb), the nb uses evolution as some sort of proof to support the non existence of god.. i agree that evolution is a fact, however i feel that evolution is proof of some sort of benevolent original cause.. if i were to create an a.i.

, i would program into it the ability to self-refactor and evolve.. i would also randomly inject viruses into the program (evil) where the a.i.

would be forced to stretch its current capabilities & modify it's operating functions in order to get through the random virus, and continue living.. with a steady flow of different viruses, the a.i.

Heartsafire

David Jay,

Appreciate your post. Particularly when you discuss the terminology behind theory and fact. Could one say the theory of evolution is factual? I have personally seen the fossils of animals we recognize today in their early evolutionary processes. Also, I totally agree with you on Wikipedia information. I avoid any info from that source like the plague. One source for research I do prefer is google scholar.

46

Evolution a Fact - Agreed but So What?

by LAWHFol in

in many debates between believers and non believers (nb), the nb uses evolution as some sort of proof to support the non existence of god.. i agree that evolution is a fact, however i feel that evolution is proof of some sort of benevolent original cause.. if i were to create an a.i.

, i would program into it the ability to self-refactor and evolve.. i would also randomly inject viruses into the program (evil) where the a.i.

would be forced to stretch its current capabilities & modify it's operating functions in order to get through the random virus, and continue living.. with a steady flow of different viruses, the a.i.

Heartsafire

Wow, great thread guys. I'm not a fundie but I am a believer. Evolution is a fact. It did happen. Also, I think the Bible should not be taken literally especially the OT--not that it's all wrong, but it needs to be put into the perspective of faith stories handed down from one gen to the next. Also, suggesting a creator would be interested in keeping creatures completely out of harms way would not be conducive to the realities of natural selection and evolution. So, if God exists, perhaps God is not all "good" or at least "good" from human perspective. I know this is getting into a branch of philosophy (which, as you know, was once the original science). I'll leave it at this: evolution is fact. But is there a grand designer or creator who started it all? Perhaps it is not probable, but it is not beyond the scope of possibility.

34

JW's Funerals, Forget About The Person! Let's Preach.

by new boy in

jw
friends

god forbid you would talk about the dead person at his funeral.

so what do most people get after living 70-80 years?.

a 5-10 minutes eulogy.

Heartsafire

Such a good point. So many times throughout the years I've heard of a tragic and/or early death of a dub only to be told that, "so many showed up to the funeral and got a good witness that wouldn't have otherwise." The last time I was told this, I mentioned how many more people would've been reached door-to-door had the dead ones lived out a full life expectancy. That got me some dirty looks. Lol.

20

Memorial Invitation

by sloppyjoe2 in

jw
friends

how do you faders/inactive handle being asked to the memorial by family?

Heartsafire

Last year I told my husband there was no point in being present because I'm just gonna pass the wine and bread like everyone else. The only dubs who actually need to be there are the ones who partake. He was so shocked by that his mouth gaped open like a large mouth bass. I guess that thought had never crossed his mind.