For the holidays my girlfriend and I had planned to travel home and enjoy some time in our home area and visit with all our families. She has several siblings and both our parents are divorced and living separately so it was a really busy time traveling around visiting each home.
My girlfriend was never a JW, but as for me I have been df'd for about 7 years now. My grandmother lives in the vicinity of our parents and she is a active JW since the 80's. She studied with me, and played a major role in grooming me to be a witness. When I was disfellowshipped, naturally she was upset and told me she could not talk to me no more.
Through the years, and her being married to my unbelieving Grandfather, we still maintained somewhat of a relationship. If I came into town I would visit with her, or she might have a meal with me and a few other family members. Occasionally she would bring up if I would ever return, or if I still believed in the Bible. I would always tell her respectfully that I would never return and that once I had learned real truths about the organization that it wasn't a possibility. I was aways careful not to push too hard and tried not to come off as trying to deceive her into apostasy.
Recently, being busy with school, work and moving to a new city, I had not kept in touch with my grandmother and started to feel a little bad about it. So I decided to give her a call and see how she was doing. The phone call was nice, and I knew she was pretty happy I had called. My grandfather passed away 2 years ago, so I know she feels lonely and the family altogether is more distant than we use to be. When I came into town this past week I had planned on seeing my grandmother, even kind of expected to see her come over and eat with my mom and introduce her to my pregnant girlfriend. When I got to my moms I asked her if grandma was coming over and she said no. I asked her why and she said "you know how your grandma can be". So a little later I pressed the question again asking why she didn't come and I didn't understand why, and my mother said that she said it was because "she feels she shouldn't associate with you".
I felt a little stab. I had just spoken to her a few weeks before and she seemed OK with a little communication. I then felt angry and told my girlfriend I would never try to speak to her again. A few days passed and my anger subsided. I was still a little hurt but I knew its what she has believed for so long. I just didn't understand why seemingly out of nowhere she decided to impose the no communication policy with me after the several years of me having somewhat of a relationship with her. It wasn't until the other night I was browsing through this website that I found out there was a study article recently in the WT about cutting ties with people who left the organization, that made me realize the timing of her actions.
I was lucky to escape in my mid twenties, others spend decades and like my grandmother some will see there own death not knowing the TTATT. I wonder, if some on their death beds finally realize that they've wasted there lives and sacrificed so much for a lie.
