Posts by Sorry

10

Depression, Anger and Anxiety

by Sorry in

for the last few months, i feel like i've been going through the 5 stages of grief.

lately, it's been happening simultaneously.

in my other posts, i've expressed anger at my family and congregation for their thoughtless ways.

For the last few months, I feel like I've been going through the 5 stages of grief. Lately, it's been happening simultaneously. In my other posts, I've expressed anger at my family and congregation for their thoughtless ways. Yet at the same time, I get incredibly saddened with the thought that one day, my family will never contact me again and act like I don't exist. Yes, it makes me angry and somewhat hate them, but it still hurts. Before my baptism, my panic attacks were controlled, they rarely occurred anymore. Now they've been happening non stop, at least twice a week for the past two months. I've been really wanting to restart my therapy sessions, but since we're in a rough spot financially, I know it's now possible. Crying spells, panic attacks, snapping on people for little to no reason and my suicidal thoughts have been the norm for a while. My boyfriend has taken notice and has greatly helped me, even tried to get one of his friends whose a therapist to talk to me (unfortunately, due to this therapist's distant location and revolving schedule, it hasn't helped much). He has stayed by my side, listened to me vent, even understood and forgiven the times I snapped at him (which I feel incredibly guilty for). The other day, he spontaneously took me out to lunch and bowling. Doesn't sound like much, but I felt great all that day.

He has been much more supportive than my family. "Oh you're sad? Obviously you're not doing enough for Jehovah and he's not blessing you. Either do more or suffer and shut up." My sadness is a sign of my spiritual weakness, and I need to get over if I want to make it into the new system. Never have I wanted to breakdown and punch someone at the same time in my life. They keep saying I must want to be depressed because I'm not happy. It's honestly sickening and fuels my anger. I hate what the WT has done to them.

I just wanted to get my feelings out there. This forum is the only place that truly understands the struggle.

21

Canada Bethel (Georgetown) to begin renovations early 2017

by Richard_I in

jw
friends

a letter was just read at my midweek meeting that georgetown (canada bethel) will have renovations done on it beginning spring 2017. the letter asked for publishers who are electricians/plumbers/etc.

and in good standing to apply to help out.

those helping out will be considered "part-time commuters" and will only be at the property for about 3 days a week and must reside outside of bethel and pay for all their own expenses.

Sorry

Have any other J-dubs put two and two together and realized their "loving volunteer work" is just free labor and a ruse to raise the Kingdumb Hell properties' market values? Minimize the costs, maximize the profits, simple business 101. I can see why people have called it a pyramid scheme. The higher ups get rich, rank and file are encouraged to work as little "secular" hours as possible to dedicate their lives to making the org richer. Sickening.

8

Slaves and Sheeps

by Sorry in

disclaimer: while this may be a sensitive topic to some, i don't wish to offend anyone.

please don't turn this into a political discussion with name calling and yelling.

i can see why the borg hates higher education.

Sorry

DISCLAIMER: while this may be a sensitive topic to some, I don't wish to offend anyone. Please don't turn this into a political discussion with name calling and yelling. Thank you.

I can see why the Borg hates higher education. Since attending college, many things I have never thought about or previously ignored made me question things. One such thing is the Bible and slavery. If you've taken a history class, you'll know that, at least in the US, Christianity was used as a tool to keep the oppressed in line (slavery and imperialism as main examples). Scriptures such as Ephesians 6:5 "slaves, obey your Earthly masters with respect" were used as a way to prevent uprisings. The Bible was pretty much used as a tool to justify their inhumane treatment of other human beings.

Given the unsavory history of slavery and the near universal negative connotations associated with slaves, it makes me question the WT as to why they keep comparing JW's to slaves. The talk on the Broadcast about "Being a Slave to Jehovah" made me squirm. Common excuses I've heard is that "the Bible wasn't written back then, so it's not talking about that" or "Jehovah is a loving master, who wouldn't be a slave for him?" Still, given the stigma and the fact the Bible was used as a tool of manipulation, you'd think they'd avoid it and simply use words just as "followers" to describe JW's.

Another one is sheep. In any other place, sheep are used to describe a brainless person who unquestionably follows orders. Yet the WT is quick to praise people who are "sheep-like". How can we possess "free will" like they claim, but we are encouraged to act like sheep and follow orders, even "if they don't make sense from a human standpoint".

If they view being "slaves" to them and "sheep" as a good thing, that's kinda cult-ish, don't you think?

30

So, how did the 'beard article' go over yesterday at your congregation?

by neat blue dog in

at mine the conductor was somewhat awkward and minimal and there were nervous chuckles from the audience.

two people, including an elder, gave reasonable comments that it's okay as long as it's not extreme styles, etc.

but then another one of the elders commented that nothing has changed and they still aren't proper locally.

Sorry

Another prime example how the WT likes to claim that Jehovah 'lovingly' gave us free will but will micro manage the pettiest crap like facial hair. Like a previous poster said, either big J finds it acceptable or he doesn't. They should stop being so passive aggressive and just say beards aren't allowed.

As far as the "all things lawful are not advantageous" and the "stumbling" bullcrap, I highly doubt anyone is that pressed over someone else's beard. No one cares. Really.

I think the organization gets off on their special snowflake status: "Oh, we have the most clean cut and wholsomely dress people! We're just so special. God's chosen people." Give me a break. If God is so petty he will rebuke you for hair on your face, that's a God I personally don't feel comfortable serving.

6

RANT: Isn't Cognitive Dissonance Amazing?

by Sorry in

this is piggybacking off my previous post (about my 'personal study').

while i haven't been a long time member, i'm sure if you have my posts you'll know that i'm disenchanted with the wt and am just grunting and bearing until i have a stable enough support system to break away.

however, lately i'm just getting extremely angry at nearly everything that's going on.

Sorry

This is piggybacking off my previous post (about my 'personal study'). While I haven't been a long time member, I'm sure if you have my posts you'll know that I'm disenchanted with the WT and am just grunting and bearing until I have a stable enough support system to break away. However, lately I'm just getting extremely angry at nearly everything that's going on.

Me and another sister were talking about a DF guy who came back twice only to finally leave. I asked her how putting his mother through that was loving. She said 1) it protects the flock from their negative influence and 2) it helps the sinner come back to Jehovah. Having been friends with the guy, I knew the only reason he came back at all was because he wanted his mom back, but he finally had to leave for the sake of his sanity. His mom has been completely depressed for a year and the congregation has been hounding her about her lack of field service and meeting attendance. I brought that up to the sister "What if they only come back for their family? What if they don't love Jehovah at all?" At first she paused, then she said Jehovah would never let the elders make such a grave error. This lit a fire in me, because we all know how much WT has erred. I suddenly came up with a litany of questions. So I said, what about the errors of the GB? New light! was her automatic answer (playback to the conversation with my mom). What about people who have died due to past doctrines like no blood and organ transplants? Why can't those who were right about doctrine being wrong be reinstated? Her answer: They died in the name of Jehovah, as good of death as most of us can hope to get. And those 'apostates' didn't wait on Jehovah, that's why they aren't reinstated. Why are you pressuring the DF guy's mom when she healing is different for everyone? Answer: Her son shouldn't have hurt her like that, her mom need to see it's not her fault. She won't feel better until she serves Jehovah wholeheartedly.

I couldn't take it anymore. I was too angry. I grabbed a travel bag and packed all my clothes. I was seriously considering just leaving and never coming back. The sheer audacity to think this is loving and okay! If you're upset about it, you clearly aren't doing enough for Jehovah. It makes me sick, and I really don't want to be a part of this anymore. I just needed to vent because I'm seriously considering cursing these people out for their harmful behavior. I no longer care about my family's or congregations feelings. When you don't care about anyone's feelings, why should I care about theirs? At first I cried day and night at the thought of losing my family and friends, now I don't care. As awful as it is to say, I'm going to shun them too. They talk so much smack about terrorists commuting atrocities in the name of religion, smearing God's name. They're too stupid to realize they're doing the exact same thing. I'm just done with all of it. Sorry for being angry, I just needed to vent.

24

Shunning & separation from family

by CJxfarmx in

i was raised in jw as a child.

my dad was a jw my mom was not, they are divorced now.

i was never baptized or anything but i stopped going once i had the choice at age 12. now i am 41 and my dad will not associate with me, my wife or my 3 kids.

Sorry

Hi CJxfarmx, I'm sorry your father is treating you this way. I find it unusual he stopped associating with you since you were never baptised. Shunning is usually reserved for those who are 'disfellowshipped' (JW talk for excommunication) or 'disassociated' (JW talk for leaving the religion). They urge you to limit contact with non believers, but not to flat out shun them. Your father's behavior sounds appalling, like he's one of those 'everything by the Watchtower' JWs. Again, I'm sorry for what J-Dubs have done to your relationship with your dad. One of my worst fears is being abandoned by my family once I finally leave this religion. My family is by the book like your father sounds. My advice to you would be to continue to have a strong relationship with your wife and kids, and be the father to them your father couldn't be to you.

12

1 Step Forward and 3 Steps Back: Trying to Get My Mom to See 'The Light' (Oh the Irony!)

by Sorry in

recently, my mother's been hounding me to do personal study (i think she's slowly realizing i'm becoming disillusioned with the organization and is trying to reign me back in).

i don't know what made me do this, but i decided to test the waters by challenging 'new light'.

she asked me what i learned in personal study, so i brought up organ transplants and the wt flip floppy stance on them (thanks jwfacts!).

Sorry

Recently, my mother's been hounding me to do personal study (I think she's slowly realizing I'm becoming disillusioned with the organization and is trying to reign me back in). I don't know what made me do this, but I decided to test the waters by challenging 'new light'. She asked me what I learned in personal study, so I brought up organ transplants and the WT flip floppy stance on them (thanks JWFacts!). I had the pages lined up and highlighted. As we all know, GB praised them in the 50s, outlawed them in the 70s and called it a 'conscience' matter in the 80s (code for they're okay now). My mother, on cue, said "the light gets brighter". Then I brought up the fact the WT has said before "old light should never contradict old light." I told her that reversing a doctrine only to go back to your original stance is contradicting "old light".

The amazing thing is she pointedly ignores my last statement and goes on about how it wouldn't have been changed if Jehovah didn't see fit. The GB isn't perfect. The apostles weren't perfect themselves. Then I said that while the apostles were far from perfect, they never had to change their teachings because they were right. At this point, my entire family gets involved and my father rants that "Jehovah knows all, we lowly humans can't comprehend everything. If he revealed everything to us, we couldn't handle it." Then my sister jumps in and says "We don't have a collection plate every Sunday, we actually hold our members accountable instead unlike churches that let everyone get away with it and we're very close-knit. That's proof this is the true religion! So what if the GB gets it wrong every now and than. Theyre humans!" My mother became the most defensive, "Why question Jehovah? That's exactly what Satan and Eve did, look what happened. He sacrificed his son for us, we don't deserve his kindness." At this point I just get quiet before they can accused me of being an apostate.

My mother hasn't asked me about 'personal study since (this was about a week ago). However, this is why I hate bringing things like this up to them. I usually end up feeling like I'm the crazy one.

21

Org Is RACIST! Towards Sisters Of COLOR In Particular--IMO!

by HiddlesWife in

i'm sorry--i'm getting this very sensitive vibe that the org (mainly those at the top) don't have any respect--forget about love--for sisters of color.

i'm coming to this conclusion from a couple of videos on jw broadcasting about single sisters.. after watching this video: .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tnjrbkggp4g.

Sorry

Yup, Scully summed it up beautifully. Women in general are treated as second class citizens, despite WTs saying stuff like "a man shouldn't dominate his wife, he should consider her input and make his own decision". However, I noticed women who are more submissive fare much better in the Org (Asians and some Caucasians as previously mentioned) as opposed to women who are more "fiesty" and "having attitude" (Africans and Latinas).

I read in Barbara Anderson's page about how a sister accused another brother of rape. He did say they had consensual sex. He was simply reproved for being repentant while she was DF'd for lying. Sisters believed her but didn't dare say anything for fear of repercussions.

JW is like a boys club. If you're a woman shame on you. If you're a "fiery" woman of color, thats a double whammy.

31

1000 Years is Like 1 Day?

by Sorry in

anyone else hear about this.

as all j-dubs know, whenever someone complains about how long the "new system" is taking too arrive, they use the excuse that jehovah works on his own time.

quite a few times during the public talks, i've heard speakers say the phrase "1000 years to us is only one day to jehovah" (my parents never stop talking about this).

Sorry

Anyone else hear about this. As all j-dubs know, whenever someone complains about how long the "new system" is taking too arrive, they use the excuse that Jehovah works on his own time. Quite a few times during the public talks, I've heard speakers say the phrase "1000 years to us is only one day to Jehovah" (my parents never stop talking about this). I don't recall seeing this in any literature. Whenever I ask other witnesses, some have heard it, but many have not. Have any of you seen or heard this? Where did that particular number come from (because others have said it's only 100)?

21

My Story

by SamTheGinge in

jw
friends

so, i joined just yesterday after coming across this forum looking at beth sarim, and i though that i would share my story with you.

it will no doubt be very similar to a lot of others, but it's a way of getting to know me at least.. i was brought up as witness from the age of 4 years old, my dad picked up the 'truth' from one of his friends in the pub and it seemed to go from there, he would quickly get baptised and progress to becoming a ministerial servant and then an elder.

from a young age i wanted to be like my dad and become a pioneer, a ministerial servant and then an elder... perhaps even becoming a co. the world, spiritually speaking, was my oyster.

Sorry

Welcome! You are not alone, I feel or stories are similar (wanting to impress parents, baptised for wrong reasons).

It sounds you've made peace with everything, started thinking for yourself and have become much happier as a result. I wish you all the best.