Posts by DogGone

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

The bottom line.... Underage is illegal. Against the law regardless of the "cultural norms" of the JW cult.

The conversation keeps equivocating on this point. Is the issue the law, in which case you have to consider the location of the OP and whether the young lady was 16 or 15, or is the issue what is acceptable, normal, and not creepy?

I think the pertinent issue is the creepy factor. When the law is brought up, you have to be willing to accept that US law on such things as alcohol consumption, gun ownership, or the age of consent (which varies by state, anyway) is not somehow the moral yardstick for the rest of humanity. America is pretty damn important, but not THAT important.

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

There is a wide gulf of experience, emotional and intellectual maturity. I mean, what's he going to do, help her with her math homework?

That made me laugh... so true.

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

Pedophile?

Or how to ensure the original poster dismisses your otherwise well thought out post. That last insult was uncalled for and completely invalid for the situation under discussion.

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

Sorry for upsetting you cognac, it wasn't my intent. Hope you feel better.

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

I agree, the effects can be devastating. I've also seen it first hand.

16 is ok, why not 15? The kid we are talking about might be 16. Why not 14, it's only the difference of a year. Could we push for 13?

Doesn't the same logic work with any other age? If 18 is ok, why not 17?

Anyway, I never made any of the laws, I'm just a Bubble Puppy. I told you that I find the 1/2 age plus 7 to be reasonable guide. I'm not defending the different laws or societal norms, just pointing out what they are.

Don't get all mad at the JWs for child molestation on a young teenager when at the same time you are ok with someone playing with this sort of fire.

Um, are you talking to me or is this meant for another poster?

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

Big difference between legal and "perfectly acceptable" cognac!

But, yes, what you call child molestation is perfectly legal in many other countries. In some, it is even perfectly acceptable. I'm sorry this is upsetting, is this new information for you?

It seems you are incorrect about the US age of consent laws. What is perfectly legal in Washington state and Nevada is a sex crime in California and Oregon.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_consent

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

GrownMidget,

You are right, morality and the law are not the same thing. The age limit is 16 in Canada, too, so a 16 year old with a 50 year old is perfectly legal here too.

But, as you say, "socially acceptable or not...."... feelings about social acceptance influence how a parent reacts. It can also depend on the maturity and experience of the youth and on the family's sense of morality. I simply don't have enough information to condemn either yourself or the parents. As Simon said, though, parents often err on the side of protection and that is good thing. Therefore, without condemning anyone, I'd answer your original question with a, "likely not".

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

Wow, it is terrible to think of an 18 year old getting convicted and having to register as a sex offender for a summer tryst with a 17 year old.

61

Over-protective parent?

by GrownMidget in

i was something like 20-21 and there was this young sister, maybe 16 who i happened to like back in the day ... uh oh ...we met in the summer convention because i made the first move while she was playing board games with her friend.

we kept in touch via skype and text messages because lived kinda far from each other.

eventually her mother heard of the stuff and said to her daughter that the chatting must stop.... well, when two people have a little crush on one another, it sure doesn't.

DogGone

If you are 20 or 21 it is illegal to have relations with someone under 18 in the US? That is surprising. I was under the impression age laws were state by state and that some have age proximity exceptions, like we do in Canada.

At any rate, this doesn't speak to the OP's range of 15 to 21. In Canada the age is 16 nationally with a 5 year close in age exception, so it is near the border depending on the exact ages.

I've always thought the half your age plus 7 rule captures the limits of creepiness fairly well. 14<>14, 18<>16, 20<>17, 24<>19, 46<>30 My brother in law, however, is in his mid 20's and has a long term relationship with a gent approaching 60. Seems like a good relationship, so there are exceptions, just not on the low end.

183

JWs have more good points than bad

by lsw1961 in

1) many who were on the destructive path have been transformed by their teachings (this includes me who was once vicious, and presumptuous and atheistic).

2) equal monthly pay to all members of the bethel community regardless of whether they are bc members or sweepers.

this is something that still remains as an unattainable dream for the world.

DogGone

A warm welcome to you. The JW religion is not all bad. It certainly was a benefit to me in my growth and development... until it very much wasn't.

Please understand, you are in a room with many people who have been hurt and abused by this religion. We have developed a different frame of reference and now look at our experience differently. Just maybe, after all, it was OK we didn't have dinner ready on time. It might seem unbalanced, but consider if you joined a forum of incest survivors, you would hear expressions of trauma and rage. Pointing out all the ways daddy was such a great guy, what with all the kind things he has done... well, you can imagine the reaction.

Many of us have lost a lot. If it seems unbalanced, well it is. Healing often is.

Jehovah's Witnesses have many great qualities. The organization is also impressive in many many ways. That is beside the point, though. Monsters do good things too.

Please keep posting. Challenge us. Call us out. It is how I got free and happy - it started with trying to prove Apostates wrong just as my journey into the JW's started with trying to prove them wrong. Keep on seeking, someone once said....