contramundum

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Posts by contramundum

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  43

  Help Please - Finding It Hard Adjusting To The Real World

  by pale.emperor in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  im asking for you guys help in a phase im going through right now.

  im sure it’ll pass but id appreciate your advice..

  born in, my family consists of mum, dad, two brothers and two sisters.

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  contramundum

  @xelder

  Waving back

  
  
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  8

  couples therapy

  by zeb in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i have often wished i knew better words to give here when i see couples 'bleeding'.

  1. avoid letting the children take over your lives.

  although you need to love and care for your children in the very best ways that you can, it’s also important that they don’t dominate your entire relationship.. children are an important part of your relationship.

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  contramundum

  I agree wholeheartedly with all of these comments.

  Zeb's tips are well thought out but only if both partners work at it together.

  I stayed in an unhappy marriage for years, feeling unloved and dreadfully lonely. I see many JW marriages the same. It is a very sad place to be.
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  17

  JW over-rode our Choice of Funeral music

  by snugglebunny in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  a few years on and the funeral of my jw momma still galls me.

  she left instructions for which kingdom songs to be sung and we gladly abided by her wishes.

  the funeral was held in a public crematorium, not a kingdom hall.

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  contramundum

  Perfect choice - this is one of my all time favourite pieces of music. I definitely want Rachmaninoff played at my funeral

  
  
  
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  43

  At a regional convention today....

  by Nobodyspecial in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it really stands out to me just how phoney the bonds of forced brotherhood are.

  the smiles are paper thin when they see each other in hotels.

  the laughs forced.

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  contramundum

  Splash - I should clarify that remark. I did eventually manage to enlist the help of a very kind brother who immediately saw the situation for what it was. He steered my friend through the wall of obstruction and she found a suitable seat. It's good to know that there are some people still 'in' who have true values.
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  43

  At a regional convention today....

  by Nobodyspecial in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  it really stands out to me just how phoney the bonds of forced brotherhood are.

  the smiles are paper thin when they see each other in hotels.

  the laughs forced.

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  contramundum

  Last RC I gave a lift to a friend in her 60's. She had recently had an operation on her foot , which was well bandaged and she could not walk without the help of crutches.

  She hadn't managed to obtain a 'ticket' in advance to allow her to sit in the coveted elderly and infirm seats on the ground floor, but I felt sure the attendants , seeing her predicament, would show compassion .

  I could not believe the lack of love, common sense and plain human decency she encountered. We were practically physically barred entry and my poor friend was abandoned in tears on an isolated chair in the foyer. She was not able to climb the steps to the other seating yet not one attendant would bend the rules in favour of showing Christian kindness and allow her access to an area she could comfortably reach. Ironic since the whole convention programme was about following the loving example of Jesus.

  I was already questioning doctrine by this stage, but this experience shockingly brought home to me the truth that so many of you have also realised - there is no real love in JW land. Obeying orders without question takes precedence over compassion and kindness every time.

  "I was only following orders". Now where have I heard that before? 😕
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  47

  My 14-year-old niece is being disfellowshipped

  by keyser soze in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was contacted by my ex sister-in-law yesterday.

  she asked me if i wanted to spend some time with my niece, while she went to her sister's baby shower.

  it turns out my niece can't go because she's about to be disfellowshipped at the ripe old age of 14. .

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  contramundum

  How sad.

  My daughter wanted to become a publisher and work towards baptism around age 9 or 10. I thought she was too young and not mature enough to realise the implications. I am so glad she didn't persevere. She too went through a tough time from age 14 and would have been df'd.

  If that had happened, I would have felt severe pressure to abandon her when she needed me most. WT practice of shunning, especially regarding young people is very cruel
  

  
  
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  30

  not all JW's are asleep

  by Damascus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i am an 'active' jw but i do not agree with most of the doctrines inc blood, baptism, the memorial etc etc.i took the emblems at the memorial because i think we all should recognise and accept jesus' command to remember him.

  not for one minute do i think this is only for the so called anointed.

  i know it is full of man made error and that my fellow brothers and sisters are in a state of mindless, spiritual unawareness.

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  contramundum

  Hi Damascus

  I also feel very similar to you - I am still dragging myself to meetings (admittedly only 2 or 3 a month now) and spend the whole time wishing I was not there.

  I listen with growing disbelief to the paper thin reasonings being parroted by unquestioning and uneducated men who have lost the ability to think for themselves and feel so sad as I look around the hall and see people I care about lapping it up , blind to how shallow and manipulative the teachings really are.

  I have stopped going on the ministry because I could not in good faith promote a religion that I now see as deluded at best, harmful and destructive often. But it does worry me at times that I am not active in making disciples . I try to compensate by being a better, more `Christian` person.

  Why do some of us keep going? We all have different reasons. For me, even though I no longer believe it is The Truth, there is a tiny voice in my brain that whispers to me "but what if it IS right?". The indoctrination and fear culture of 40+ years is tough to shake off.

  CM
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  7

  A Conversation with my Mom about Anthony Morris, Spanx, and Tight Pan

  by Brokeback Watchtower in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  you get them ac.. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jhj4vyo6myu.

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  contramundum

  This really made me laugh - yes, 'at' AMIII, not with him
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  17

  Vacation Time! Going To A Regional?

  by millie210 in

  1. watchtower
  2. beliefs

  this is the first year i have not been at a summer assembly.. the friends here locally just got back from the regional in our area.. they mostly took their vacation time from work to attend.. while they were gone i had an epiphany...... why is it that the rank and file take their summer vacation time to attend an assembly (we have all heard this hammered in from the platform) whereas the governing body attend as part of their "work".. it cant be as simple as "well, they are giving talks" because there are many brothers that give talks from the rank and file also who have used up precious vacation hours and drug their entire family there plus give their parts.. or what about other brothers and sisters who volunteer and clean at the assembly.

  on vacation.. so the pubs.

  travel at their own expense, pay for their own rooms and food, and give parts and it is supposed to be viewed as their vacation.. the gb and c.o.s travel to the same assembly and stay in provided for accomadations, give a talk or two and they are "working".. what is that about?.

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  contramundum

  I know one family who save all year so they can afford the expected 'donation' to travel to the RC each day on the congregation organised coach. It is a huge pressure on their already tight finances.
  Every convention I have ever attended for work always has lunch, drinks and snacks provided without charge (often the highlight in an otherwise tedious day)
  Come to think of it, when I was a child, the food at conventions was still the highlight of the day for me
  
  
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  29

  Assemblies - Before and After Waking Up

  by Funchback in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  happy friday to all!.

  i haven't been to a meeting for maybe 10 years.

  i only know what's happening nowadays from the experiences i read here or the internet in general.. anyway, on to the topic: i started attending meetings at the age of 7. as a kid, the only thing i looked forward to at the assemblies (circuit/district) was walking around veteran's stadium (philadelphia district convention) during intermission, hanging with friends, looking at girls (as i got a little older) and trying to have enough tickets to get pizza!.

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  contramundum

  The memories I have as a child in the '70s at Twickenham Rugby Stadium: - sitting on concrete steps (no seats) under plastic sheeting in the pouring rain wiping condensation away so I could see the drama - counting the number of aeroplanes passing overhead approaching Heathrow Airport. It was especially exciting when Concorde flew past - so loud the speaker had to stop talking - saving up food tickets to binge on chocolate at the end of the convention
  I'm afraid I don't seem to remember any 'spiritual gems' - maybe my subconscious has deliberately erased the more unpleasant memories