Posts by CovertsadJW

20

Best way to deal with anger at the GB while waking up?

by CovertsadJW in

good morning everyone , .

i am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the gb when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing .

i have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days.

CovertsadJW

Thank you everyone,

My wife sees this in me ( previous post) , so I won't go down that road. I am college educated , but I would like to get an advanced degree for myself and no other reason. I would love to help my kids understand that life is very, very special and take the time to really understand who you are, what you represent, what you enjoy in life. What most people may not understand that you will change as a person as you get older, your views will change, and as you get educated it is okay to remove old belief systems that do not work any longer, take to much of your emotional input with no return. I see being a JW as a one way street only-what can you do for us- The GB does not care who we are, what we like, what our passions in life is, what makes us special in the universe. Its such a one sided cult and its amazing that I was in it for so long. But I agree with so many of the comments and I would like to thank all of you-this is my therapy. I went to a therapist, but at $ 160.00 per hour that is so expensive. I will go in the new future, but I need to have kind of a plan and goal for therapy and this is helping me. I have been in contact with Marlene Winell, Phd who started the " RTS" or Religious Trauma Syndrome-I don't live too far from her but she "Skypes". I understand that I will be going through these emotions, and I cannot let them control me, but I guess recognize as part of the process. But yes, it feels like I lost a very close person in death-seriously. I am in my 40's and have never felt like this. Thank you everyone. !!

Warm regards and carry on.

20

Best way to deal with anger at the GB while waking up?

by CovertsadJW in

good morning everyone , .

i am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the gb when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing .

i have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days.

CovertsadJW

Thanks much for the input- I am a happy guy ( I can separate the anger ) at GB and I don’t take it out on others - but i do have to be kinder to myself as we are not taught that as J-Dubs. I was born in with about 30+!family members, cousins , grandparents , etc in- so that’s a huge motivator to stay in.

20

Best way to deal with anger at the GB while waking up?

by CovertsadJW in

good morning everyone , .

i am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the gb when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing .

i have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days.

CovertsadJW

I thinks it’s a combination of deceit , lies , wasted time. I also feel that it’s so much about 80%-90% of the fact that once realized that’s pain enough. In a normal club , faith of the non-cult type I could just walk away without a second more damaging injury of loosing family , etc. I think now that I am writing about it , yes I could turn the page on that part of my life in a normal non cult faith and move on, focus on myself and positive things. That would not be too bad. It’s the waking up knowing the consequences of waking up I think - if that makes sense.

20

Best way to deal with anger at the GB while waking up?

by CovertsadJW in

good morning everyone , .

i am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the gb when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing .

i have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days.

CovertsadJW

Good morning everyone ,

I am wondering how people have personally delt with the anger at the GB when waking up and realizing it’s a scam, lie , and it’s awfully depressing . I have had difficulty concentrating at work , have had an emotional roller coaster between okay days and awful days. I am almost fixated on reading and watching Videos on the GB, false prophecies , etc . II know everyone’s personal battles are different, I think I am fairly tough emotionally - but I feel like I have been run over by a truck - and have mixed feelings of sadness, anger , almost a hatred . Is this proportionate with others experiences ? I have never experienced anything like this emotionally before in my entire life.

Thank you

30

Couple of real gems in the WT study for this upcoming weekend

by sir82 in

since blondie seems to still be on sabbatical, i'll take the liberty of highlighting a couple of "gems" from this week's upcoming study, from the article "reject worldly thinking".. from paragraph 12:.

is it true that succeeding in a secular career that offers power and prestige leads to lasting happiness?

remember that the craving to control others and the longing to be admired are the desires that enticed satan, but he is angry, not happy.. .

CovertsadJW

A brother I knew pinstriped and chromed cars out in the lower half of the quarter panels a long time ago .....it seems so many brothers were doing similar things. I was in construction right out of high school - as were most of the brothers I knew. Damn GB, screwed up so many lives

57

What to Do....Please Help. Awakening JW for a very long time

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i have been having doubts for many years and as most jw's i have certainly not done myself a favor by suppressing all of my critical thinking.

i am married with 3 kids and my wife and i are inactive, but my wife has made it very clear in speech and action that she wants to go to all meetings, field service, and indoctrinate our kids.

CovertsadJW

What do you do about the anger that one experiences when waking up. Anger of being lied to for decades, anger about wasting allot of time on nonsense. I am sure its a normal reaction , but I am wondering what others have done? I watched a video of " Tight Pants Tony" giving a talk where he was obsessed with armageddon , death, talked about people rotting, split open , smelly, and the streets full of them. I saw that on " John Cedars Channel" and I was so pissed. The amount of fear being dispensed was incredible, and to think I have been getting a constant diet of that my entire life. I spoke with this to my JW parents tonight and my dad listened, but just laughed. I said what part of that talk is moral or humane and I cant imagine my kids listening to it; not one part was moral, humane, or positive. Im pissed that I have been to countless assemblies, and listened to this crap but never really listened. He also said " look around at the store next time and just imagine those people " ...bla,bla,bla.

57

What to Do....Please Help. Awakening JW for a very long time

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i have been having doubts for many years and as most jw's i have certainly not done myself a favor by suppressing all of my critical thinking.

i am married with 3 kids and my wife and i are inactive, but my wife has made it very clear in speech and action that she wants to go to all meetings, field service, and indoctrinate our kids.

CovertsadJW

Thank you everyone , and I so much appreciate your kind words. I have had doubts for a very long time - I think I have been waking up for a very long time. This is the most I have been able to talk about this ever; I am amazed and very appreciate everyone. So if I’m long winded or maybe reapeat myself a little - I apologize:) I think I worry about the kids the most. These problems are not new at all, just reached a boil over point. Again thank you everyone - thanks for the sheparding talk ....lol

57

What to Do....Please Help. Awakening JW for a very long time

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i have been having doubts for many years and as most jw's i have certainly not done myself a favor by suppressing all of my critical thinking.

i am married with 3 kids and my wife and i are inactive, but my wife has made it very clear in speech and action that she wants to go to all meetings, field service, and indoctrinate our kids.

CovertsadJW

Thank you and I look forward to your input as I am having some “ self harm” thoughts at times - no where near that point - but hearing from you later would help - have a good day at work ...I’m folding laundry , time to pick up the kids at school

57

What to Do....Please Help. Awakening JW for a very long time

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i have been having doubts for many years and as most jw's i have certainly not done myself a favor by suppressing all of my critical thinking.

i am married with 3 kids and my wife and i are inactive, but my wife has made it very clear in speech and action that she wants to go to all meetings, field service, and indoctrinate our kids.

CovertsadJW

Thanks ,

I will be purchasing that book and read it myself.

57

What to Do....Please Help. Awakening JW for a very long time

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i have been having doubts for many years and as most jw's i have certainly not done myself a favor by suppressing all of my critical thinking.

i am married with 3 kids and my wife and i are inactive, but my wife has made it very clear in speech and action that she wants to go to all meetings, field service, and indoctrinate our kids.

CovertsadJW

Do you think the “ cult was making you unhappy “ ? I ask because that all she talks about - how we are not doing enough, late for meetings , don’t have a family bible study , etc , etc. She was off and mad about something and I said “ I am very happy internally “ and I don’t need others approval. Wow that went over well , happiness is based on an internal locus and not and external locus for sure - people are chasing everything to be happy to no avail. The hardest part is watching affect me and the kids fairly significantly and it’s getting worse. She cannot and will not verbalize her “ behavior “ as inappropriate, has never said sorry. It’s a hard position to be in - religion issues and wife issues all tied up in one. She is too proud to go to therapy , see faults in herself , but so quick to blame me for her unhappiness all the time. Am I crazy ? Knowing the truth is a “ lie “ and my wife will not bend , look at facts , communicate without anger and cutting remarks says much. I am serious when I I have said ....is she trying to destroy our relationship and blame me or is she that blind to her behavior that she thinks she is doing good. She has really pushed me away , but now I look like “ a spiritually weak one “ when in fact that’s not true. I won’t say what I do for a living but when people ask me “ how can I be successful in this job .” I always say be humble so you can learn from others - same applies to waking up from the truth. You have to be very humble to wake up, you have to want truth and facts as it’s a very very painful process based on so many factors. Not one person says “ give me all of this pain “ Man I have nothing better to do than be a jerk , trash my religion, cause myself psychological harm , and maybe loose my family and friends for leaving - what craziness. But the facts are the facts