Posts by CovertsadJW

35

The Constant Mindchatter After You Leave

by pale.emperor in

i've been out almost 2 years now and consider myself wide awake to watchtower propaganda and well on my way to recovery from the mental abuse we've all experienced.. one thing that just will not go is that i constantly think of jwism and watchtower and get myself all annoyed at their lies and blatant twisting of facts in their broadcasts and magazines.

it's so bad that it's the first thing i think of when i wake up, then i have these mental arguments in my head proving the jw teachings false and then getting annoyed because no jw will listen even if you tried to tell them.

i call this constant thinking and mental reasoning and mental arguing "mindchatter".

CovertsadJW

I’ve thought of the same things and have some of the same issues - what I may try and do is give myself a time limit everyday to address and mourn my loss and losses. We are all severely impacted by this cult so it will always be a part of who we are. Just as war , famine , rape physical abuse and emotional abuse , etc will always be a part of those who have experienced it firsthand. I have been mourning he loss of my “ faith “ and my family does not undersntad - my parents most likely think I’m “nuts” I can’t share how I feel with my JW wife - I literally feel like I’m going crazy at times. I don’t know allot but I feel like I know the following: I am a good person who has been abused by a cult. I no longer want to be a part of that cult. I want to also help others to avoid the JW cult like practices. It also drives me crazy that people “ don’t get it “ , but they never will unless the research and dig. .....

49

How Many People Here Still Believe In “God”?

by minimus in

jw
friends

because of this site i realized that there were many people who were active jehovah’s witnesses really didn’t believe in god at all.

i’m curious how many people believe in god?

i’m not interested in debating why you shouldn’t have a belief in a god or should.

CovertsadJW

Nope

25

Thanks For being helpful

by Jrjw in

to the person who reported me to the elders from here - thank you for making me be able to leave the organisation a whole lot easier and sooner than i'd planned.

you did me a huge favour 😊.

CovertsadJW

Someday I too will be 100% free

4

Wow , it’s all so very clear -

by CovertsadJW in

the late great christopher hitchens states that religion is poison and i believe that with my soul.

we are “ born sick and commanded to be well.” under threat of death- both of my parents were abused both physically and emotionally, my wife was what it sounds like verbally abused - the strange part is they don’t see that they are attached to a very abusive religion.

thoughts ?

CovertsadJW

The late great Christopher Hitchens states that religion is poison and I believe that with my soul. We are “ born sick and commanded to be well.” Under threat of death- Both of my parents were abused both physically and emotionally, my wife was what it sounds like verbally abused - the strange part is they don’t see that they are attached to a very abusive religion. Thoughts ? I pout out abuseve practices but my parents do not see it - but that’s not a new problem and I’m not unique. I just now see how it damages people , relationships , causes depression , anxiety , etc. It’s a horribly devistating faith with no room for humanity. The fuzzy parts are far outweighed by the Pharisee - like teachings

315

Pillowgate - John Cedars

by CitizenofEarth in

is this true?

is this really true?!.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qirjv48c55m.

CovertsadJW

While so funny; its really sad-I mean not one JW is taught how to grow up and address his or her sexuality in a health, non destructive way. We are taught to suppress , sex is dirty, desire is dirty, that leads to all kinds of problems. Just stack this on top of all the other controlling behavior and Wow thats all I can say.

28

What was your trigger to waking up ?

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i wanted to ask everyone here , what was your trigger to waking up ?

i have been waking up for a long time , but in looking back it’s hard for me to look at one event and say “ ah ha “ , i think mine is like a slow leak - like a crack in a damn - and then hold on , because after that it’s just a flood of information.

CovertsadJW

Thank you everyone

44

I've Disassociated. It's getting announced tomorrow.

by Heathen Dan in

jw
friends

this is my first post to this site, im pale.emperor's brother:).

first of all, i've left being a jw in june.

since then my family have tried to convince me it's "the truth" and force me to go back even though it's my own decision.

CovertsadJW

Welcome Dan,

When I think about love and respect one quote comes to mind. “ What you do speaks so loudly I can’t hear what you say.” The actions are not loving and kind - words included - you did something I wish I could do today - you are strong and find and surround yourself with people who love and respect you.

Warm regards

28

What was your trigger to waking up ?

by CovertsadJW in

good afternoon , .

i wanted to ask everyone here , what was your trigger to waking up ?

i have been waking up for a long time , but in looking back it’s hard for me to look at one event and say “ ah ha “ , i think mine is like a slow leak - like a crack in a damn - and then hold on , because after that it’s just a flood of information.

CovertsadJW

Good afternoon ,

I wanted to ask everyone here , what was your trigger to waking up ? I have been waking up for a long time , but in looking back it’s hard for me to look at one event and say “ ah ha “ , I think mine is like a slow leak - like a crack in a damn - and then hold on , because after that it’s just a flood of information. Side point- I was in a semi not so rare mood lately , not over the top but just amazed and disgusted at rh same time. In speaking with my dad I said “ I cannot believe “ Tony the Tight Pants Morris “ can sit there and provide graphics detail on how you will “ die” at Armageddon, lay dead in the streets, smell of the flesh , etc and think that’s okay - that is abuseive and threatening people with death 💀, - then I realized I have been threatened with death my whole life - My dads thought - well don’t let your emetions control you. What ? Wait ? This is okay ? Inhad strong words but not emotional crazy- I said I reject the people “ threatening me with permanent destruction. Inaslo said my kids should not be listening to this crap- fear and emotional control - but he make me out to be he slightly emotional one. I did tell him that I am not the one threatening a group with death- how is that moral or healthy to hear your whole life ?

37

You or Family at Uni? Bye bye Ministerial Servants Position

by snugglebunny in

kingdom ministry school.

2018 service year.

programme for congregation elders: file:///c:/users/michael/downloads/kms-tk18-e_no8.pdf.

CovertsadJW

The more iI dig , the more I can’t stomach it. The GB talks out of both sides of their “ arses “ - this is designed to put maximum pressure on those who take “ the lead “ - in turn they can put maximum pressure on the followers - who then can eventually put maximum pressure on their kids , the studies , etc. Brain washing at its finest - this makes me so mad - that’s why I don’t want my kids part of this damn cult. What a bunch of bull shit -!

59

A Little Direction Please

by Brian J in

i'm an active elder, cobe, just got home from the meeting where i handled the treasures part and concluded by announcing a friend of mine has been d/f,.....blah blah blah...and over the last year have woken up.

i simply cannot spill my guts to my wife and children as it would be family suicide.

i have zero desire to bash, spread my feelings, or become an "apostate".

CovertsadJW

I am in the same position, but unfortunately I am unable to poke holes in the teachings-so I am mostly silent. I am fading, but my wife sees that and she gets so angry. I have come to the conclusion over so many months that their is no good -pain free options-only what may work for you. If my wife would accept and discuss the failings of the WT, that would make life so much easier. She refuses to discuss anything WT-reality not negative-with me. I have the right to stand up for what I believe just as much as she does, and I have just as much right to explain to the kids that the WT is not the right place to put your trust, and future. I have read stories of people planting seeds of doubt, but I am unable to do that; my wife picks up on that and gets angry every time. I love the examples of family research, family discussion about topics, and a slow process where everyone eventually comes to the same conclusion. I am unable to take that path in my home-I have tried multiple times. I am painted in a bad light to my kids; so it is painful and more painful. She immediately knows what I am up to, but its so hard to stay silent as when you really listen to the " language" used at the KH's ,its depressing, manipulative, guilt-ridden, anxiety producing bull-shit. She was proud of our son that was reading along during the last WT about education( Jan 21) -I almost vomited when I read that crap. Manipulation, Manipulation, controlling-watching my kids be partially brainwashed is very hard. This is not going to end well I don't think- I cannot even close to fake it anymore. I want my kids to have a normal life, be confident, pursue a dream, fin their place in the world out side of some crazy cult.

Frustrated.