Posts by NoviceLocs14

6

The REAL Reason I Stopped Going to Meetings

by NoviceLocs14 in

to sum it up in all one word...pride.. i've always kind of attributed my subconscious "fade" to shame for living a double life by dating my non-jw boyfriend (now husband) while serving as a pioneer in the foreign language field.

but i was actually pretty regular for awhile.. my pioneer hours did start to dwindle, however.

i had always struggled with the hourly requirement, but i was really struggling now.

NoviceLocs14

To sum it up in all one word...PRIDE.

I've always kind of attributed my subconscious "fade" to shame for living a double life by dating my non-JW boyfriend (now husband) while serving as a pioneer in the foreign language field. But I was actually pretty regular for awhile.

My pioneer hours did start to dwindle, however. I had always struggled with the hourly requirement, but I was really struggling now. I had taken to "fudging" hours on my time report, but I made sure even those hours were less than the required hours, since I didn't want anyone becoming suspicious lol.

The elders finally said they had to meet with me. I agreed to meet them at the Kingdom Hall. When I got there, there were 3 elders standing in front of me. I inwardly started freaking out because I thought my double life had caught up with me. Then mysteriously, they dismissed the third elder and took me in the back room. They pretty much told me that I should probably come off the pioneer list. I agreed, kind of relieved they made that decision for me.

Until I realized that they were going to announce that I was stepping down as a pioneer at the meeting in front of the entire congregation. I had never had my name announced on the podium for anything other than good news, so an announcement like that and the subsequent judging from my so called brothers and sisters mortified me.

So I decided to avoid the humiliation altogether by not going to the meetings, especially since I didn't know which meeting they were going to make the announcement.

So I guess you could say pride and fear of humiliation led to my unknowing fade...

42

To Fade or Disassociate

by Jules Saturn in

hello to all, so i did want to talk about this topic because i think it is very important to me.

i have a grandfather who faded several decades ago.

he occasionally attends an assembly and the memorial but no longer attends meetings or goes on field service.

NoviceLocs14

I wasn't even familiar with the term fade until after I disassociated. Unfortunately, I was naive and still playing by the borg's rules, so I didn't realize that was an option. Plus I wanted to stop the harassment from the elders, who kept trying to meet with me. Of course, I don't have contact with most of my family, who considers it worse that I left of my own accord instead of allowing the arseholes to kick me out.

But I share dubstep's sentiments as well. I'm happy to not have the negativity in my life, and I was able to completely cut ties with the BS.

30

Had twin babies with a married JW?!?!?!?!?!?! advice & thoughts

by Gokumonkey in

before i begin i just wanna say, im not proud of what i did, it was wrong but it happened now im just trying to do the right thing.. ok so im a "worldly" person and i meet a jw women at my job.

i had no idea she was married due to the fact that she hid her wedding ring.

i even ask if she was in a relationship and she denied it.

NoviceLocs14

Lawyer up. This woman sounds manipulative. If you're in the US, she can sic the courts after you for child support whether or not you have visitation rights and/or are providing for the kids by giving her money directly. Once the courts get involved, it can get pretty ugly, and they tend to side with the custodial parent (typically the mother).

5

God bless the man who invented yoga pants

by Chook in

sitting with my son in shopping centre, a girl walks past and then he said the above statement.

i thought it he said it.

.

NoviceLocs14

Or Spanx, as our dear Bro. Morris would call them.

12

Worse than the maggots apparently...

by NoviceLocs14 in

so after a couple of years, i've finally re-established contact with a close relative (not revealing too much for privacy reasons).

it turns out that he is dfd (for the typical jw reasons, of course).

we caught up about a lot of things, including family.

NoviceLocs14

So after a couple of years, I've finally re-established contact with a close relative (not revealing too much for privacy reasons). It turns out that he is DFd (for the typical JW reasons, of course). We caught up about a lot of things, including family. He actually has very limited contact with my immediate JW family despite formally being out of the org.

Anyway, he later told me she told another close JW relative that he had been in touch with me, and I was doing well. The relative told him to be careful talking with me because I was a "dangerous aPAWstate" for disassociating.

So basically people who decide that the truth is a lie are worse than people who are kicked out for breaking their rules...

I still don't regret leaving this cult, but the hypocrisy of it all kind of pisses me off.

34

Oct 2017 WT again shunning instructions

by Daniel1555 in

.

NoviceLocs14

34

Oct 2017 WT again shunning instructions

by Daniel1555 in

.

NoviceLocs14

Aaannndd this is why I regret reverse shunning my JW family less and less. When I decided to distance myself from "da troof", I knew what was coming. I had seen it happen to other DFed family members and friends, and I was guilty of doing it myself. It's a shame how much control this organization desires over its members.

72

Favorite/least favorite CO's and DO's

by HereIgo in

i posted this thread sometime last year but thought i would revive it due to the new ones on the board, and to change things up a bit.

my favorite?

bro murikami, from hawaii, very humble, kind bro.

NoviceLocs14

@dugout that Bro. Dyson sounded like the same CO in my grandma's circuit. He sounded really intimidating from the stage when I would attend meetings and assemblies while visiting her. And she had some horror stories of her own about him as well.

24

Last Memorial Experiences

by NoviceLocs14 in

i'll share mine first.... i had never missed a memorial for at least a quarter of a century of my life.

i was kind of raised to believe that missing the memorial was a sin in itself.. by 2013 memorial season, i was missing most of my meetings (even though i was still technically part of my foreign language congregation), and i had just come off the pioneer list.

i still made plans to attend the memorial (god forbid if i missed that lol).. i knew that typically our memorials were around 9 pm, since we usually got last priority (being a foreign language hall and all).

NoviceLocs14

@Crazyguy I'm actually not an atheist but I have learned the error of my ways lol.

24

Last Memorial Experiences

by NoviceLocs14 in

i'll share mine first.... i had never missed a memorial for at least a quarter of a century of my life.

i was kind of raised to believe that missing the memorial was a sin in itself.. by 2013 memorial season, i was missing most of my meetings (even though i was still technically part of my foreign language congregation), and i had just come off the pioneer list.

i still made plans to attend the memorial (god forbid if i missed that lol).. i knew that typically our memorials were around 9 pm, since we usually got last priority (being a foreign language hall and all).

NoviceLocs14

I'll share mine first...

I had never missed a memorial for at least a quarter of a century of my life. I was kind of raised to believe that missing the memorial was a sin in itself.

By 2013 memorial season, I was missing most of my meetings (even though I was still technically part of my foreign language congregation), and I had just come off the pioneer list. I still made plans to attend the Memorial (God forbid if I missed that lol).

I knew that typically our memorials were around 9 pm, since we usually got last priority (being a foreign language hall and all). The problem was I hadn't been to a meeting in several weeks, so I couldn't confirm the time.

So I get to my kingdumb hall at 9, and to my horror, I see people from my congregation walking out the doors into the parking lot. It turns out, the memorial was actually at 7:30, despite 3 straight years of being later than that. I don't know how the heck I got out of that parking lot without anyone catching me.

I ended up driving all over Atlanta, where I lived at the time, praying to Jehovah all the way to help me find a Memorial to go to. The guilt I had for possibly missing the memorial was overwhelming (what a shame). I ended up driving to 3 different kingdumb halls across Atlanta before I found a memorial that was still in session (by now, it's almost 10 o'clock at night). I made it just in time to pass the emblems.

I remember actually making it to one of my meetings to field circus after that and my FS overseer giving me the side eye and cold shoulder, almost like "How DARE you miss the memorial!"

Anyway, I'd love to hear your stories...